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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

For wanting to ring dd’s boss up and tear her a new arsehole?

227 replies

NicoAndTheNiners · 08/08/2018 17:33

I won’t actually do it but feel like it.

Dd is 17yo, in sixth form. Good, polite, hard working kid. She’s been desperate for a job and heard that a business in the village was employing.

I had slight reservations as I know this business gets through staff quickly and I’ve also seen them asking for people to work unpaid for a week on trial before potentially getting a job.

Anyway dd started working for them on a Sunday. Gets £25 for 8 hours so not even minimum wage which isn’t good. No break either. But enjoys the work and gets on with the manager ok. Manager told dd she was the best person they’d had in ages and was professional as she works hard and isn’t on her phone like others have been.

She was asked if she wanted more work over the summer and texted back to say she could work but not Tuesdays or Saturdays. They texted her back saying they wanted her to work this Tuesday (2 days before). She had plans but didn’t want to upset them so texted back and said she could work but only till 12. So did 4 hours work.

During this shift the manager made her aware of some comments that the business owner had written in a staff handbook about dd. Dd said it was an A4 page of ranting saying that dds work the previous weekend had not been up to scratch. Lots of swearing, “I’m fucking sick of x, she’s a fucking lazy bitch and I’m running out of patience”.

Dd has only told me today and broke down in tears. She says it’s not even true. She did everything she was supposed to do and spent 4 hours making the place spotless. The business involves animals and the boss was basically mad because the next morning there was animal poo about.....odd that dd finishes at 4pm so by the next morning the animals will have produced more shit. Dd Is adamant she cleaned all the poo up on her shift.

When she finished at 12 the owner refused to pay her anything because she said she hadn’t done a full shift. They’ve asked dd to work next Tuesday and said they’re doing it to teach a lesson because if she was an adult she would have to prioritise her job over driving lessons. Dd has told them she can only work the morning again and says she will do it even though she doesn’t think they will pay her again.

I’ve told her not to go back. I’ve offered to ring up and either politely or ideally not very politely tell them she won’t be coming back. I really want to ring the woman up and say I think she’s a disgusting excuse of a human who is bullying a teenager and not even paying her. I’m fucking furious. Dd says she doesn’t want any conflict and will just carry on working until the end of the summer and then tell them she needs to stop,work to concentrate on a levels.

I’m certainly planning on reporting them to whoever cares about minimum wage breaches.

OP posts:
PolloDePrimavera · 09/08/2018 20:17

I'm sorry your daughter has had such a bad experience. They sound horrendous and I certainly wouldn't have had the wherewithal to do anything myself at 17 so hats off to those of you who could (I've made up for it since).
I also strongly think the kennels should be reported: I'm on holiday atm and spent ages researching kennels for my dog and the small space doesn't sound right.
Finally, I cannot stand women being bitches to other, esp young women. What a mean, unprofessional and classless cow the owner must be! I'd say don't go in, only because they will NEVER agree and you may just end up being upset. But you must do something.

ToftyAC · 09/08/2018 20:35

ACAS
HMRC
RSPCA
Local Council for the licence
Social Media
Ruin the bastards....

Shezza71 · 09/08/2018 20:44

Your DD should be getting payslips and the company could get into trouble for not informing HMRC of the employment. Possibly your DD as well. So definitely ring them for advice. I would also encourage your DD to try and sort this herself, she may need a lot of support from you to do this. I have 2 DDs 18 & 20 who have had their share of horrible bosses already and they felt much better for standing up to them themselves. Although daunting at the time.

Arian1 · 09/08/2018 21:00

Please publish their address on the cruelty for animals league. They will probably bring a dingy and sit in the middle of her yard with a speaker phone and a waving scarfs around and get there business shut down.....or is that green peace?? Anyway contact any animal rights activists about the excessive poo from the animals, they may be feeding the animals laxatives for all you know!!! Good luck comrade

133jkc · 09/08/2018 21:55

My DD will be of working age soon, that’s horrendous, but as mums, (do we?) have to let them have these lessons? You said they go through staff regularly, so IMO she should either confront bosses, or put this under her belt and grab a better gig. They don’t deserve her.

Lifetheuniverseandeverything · 09/08/2018 22:42

Sounds like the vile woman that runs the cattery/kennels in our village. The animals are kept in their pens all day but she tells the owners they are walked daily. Screams at kids working there on work placements or working part time to get free work out of them. Your daughter sounds lovely and I hope she finds something else soon. This was the owner's psycho carry on and she shouldn't take it to heart.

dieseldriver · 09/08/2018 22:48

I think there are genuine anti slavery laws to deal with these types of people. Involve the police if he wont pay your daughter. She cant go back. Yes- tear several new arseholes

Nothing to do with police. A civil matter, not a criminal offence. Police will tell you what I already posted.

Contact ASAS now! The longer you leave it, the less chance of ASAC getting an agreement with the employer.

Angiemum23 · 09/08/2018 23:15

I would report him for wages fraud

deifersmum · 10/08/2018 00:25

Please please report these people to the rspca the conditions thos animals are living in don't sound too good.

With regards to your dd's money she worked the hours she's entitled to be paid sounds like her boss is a bully and needs taking down.

strawberrisc · 10/08/2018 06:15

Such a shame for your daughter. She sounds conscientious and should be working, not lying in bed crying. Is there NO way she could find a waitressing job somewhere?

Nearly47 · 10/08/2018 07:45

Don't allow you daughter to go back to this place. This is serious bullying. She is still young and need to learn she shouldnt accept this kind of behaviour from a employer. Tell her not go back. Keep your promise of not talking to the boss and report to the authorities. If she wants to work as a waitress tell her to try an agency that cater to events. They find casual work so she can get started. Few hours shifts a day. Doing weddings, etc.

JaneEB · 10/08/2018 08:14

Devils advocate here.

You might struggle to prove she was not an apprentice and did not have a break.

What you need to do if you can is ask around and find out who else "worked" there.

Either way, something needs doing. Maybe someone like BBC Watchdog would be interested, especially if there is serious bullying. Do they advertise in any local papers? Would it be worth getting a small story in the paper they advertise in>

Here is information as to the national minimum wage www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1902

Don't forget that she has been doing this for some time, she will have her get out of jail cards all lined up, you need to keep notes of everything

HDG1234 · 10/08/2018 10:18

Oh my goodness, this is outrageous! No adult wage earner would put up with it and they are taking the piss because your daughter is a teenager and they think she will put up with it. No break??? Illegal, surely, for 8 hours?? If you need to, show her this thread so she knows it’s not just you. She really mustn’t go back.

fridgepants · 10/08/2018 13:14

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the user's request.

twattymctwatterson · 10/08/2018 13:39

Your daughter is being exploited. Teaching her not to accept awful behaviour is an important life skill. If she'll accept this, she'll accept abuse in other relationships

dieseldriver · 10/08/2018 20:38

I would report him for wages fraud

Report to who? Like I posted earlier, its a civil dispute that ACAS deals with.
If ACAS unable to get a resolution, then depending on circumstances, either an industrial tribunal on the grounds of breach of contract, or small claims court? Either way, a solicitor that specialises in employment law needed to help.

Also like I posted earlier, as a union rep I have won many cases of lose of earnings. All the information you need can be found on the ACAS website.

kezibear · 10/08/2018 20:48

I understand your daughter doesn't want you to get involved re her job and her wages BUT the dog haven't got a voice. Please call the rspca, they will visit and hopefully help the dogs.

sashadjas · 10/08/2018 22:18

Personally, I'd do all the legal stuff first and make sure DD has her wages and has left - THEN I'd go and tear that baggage of a boss a new arsehole!

Larrythecat · 11/08/2018 13:58

twattymctwatterson
Your daughter is being exploited. Teaching her not to accept awful behaviour is an important life skill. If she'll accept this, she'll accept abuse in other relationships

^ This!!!
It's important that she stands up to abuse of any kind. This is not just a badly paid job.

dieseldriver · 11/08/2018 22:11

Personally, I'd do all the legal stuff first and make sure DD has her wages and has left - THEN I'd go and tear that baggage of a boss a new arsehole

Hit the nail on the head with this. If don't go the way ACAS advises, a lost case

KarmaStar · 12/08/2018 08:47

Hi op not only would I not allow my dc back if have concerns about the dogs welfare.sorry to go off track here,but if your dd left at 2pm and nobody tended to the dogs until the next day,that is extremely worrying and if be speaking to the rspca.
Your dd sounds lovely and I hope she finds a job where she is treated with the respect she deserves.
Is your only evidence,apart from lack of wages,of what the owner wrote verbal?could you get hold of photo the staff notebook to check if this is actually true?
Best to have all your facts and as much hard evidence as possible,it will be better than "she told me that she had said".
Good luck.Flowers

NicoAndTheNiners · 12/08/2018 08:56

Well dd quit. She texted her boss last night to say she wouldn’t be coming back but made up a reason of a new job rather than tell her it’s because you treat me like shit/don’t pay me.

Boss just texted back “no problem”.

I’m going to report to rspca and hmrc tomorrow. Don’t think I’m going to go and get the £12.50 of missing wages she’s owed. Part of me wants to just to not let her get away with it but after dd has told me of incidents where the boss has been screaming and swearing at paying customers I think it would be a stressful experience for the sake of £12. I’ll give dd the money myself and start badmouthing the kennels locally. Dog is off to the village groomers tomorrow so will start there! Grin

OP posts:
Hideandgo · 12/08/2018 09:01

You show her what to do, you don’t do it for her. This is an opportunity to teach her one of the MOST critical lessons in life, especially as a woman. How not to be taken advantage of.

Get her to write out the facts in bullet points. Then help her make the call to quit while preparing her for the abuse over the phone she’ll likely get. And prepare her to tell them who she is reporting them to for employment violations. Then take her out to celebrate standing up for herself.

You should NOT step in for her and do her dirty work. She’s 17, not 12.

dieseldriver · 12/08/2018 09:38

Hideandgo

Who will you be reporting employment violations to?

ASAC is the people that deal with this. And have no power to take any action. You will be told any employment violations have be dealt with by the person concerned or the persons representative.

Hideandgo · 12/08/2018 11:25

Diesel, thank god you’re here to clarify. That’s exactly the sort of thing I’d be helping her research, who she can report them to.

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