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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Celebrities should at least be civil?

133 replies

Aprilsinparis · 06/08/2018 10:26

AIBU to at least expect Celeb's to be civil, when approached. I understand they may be having a bad day, but because they are celeb's the impression they leave with fans will last a life time good or bad.

OP posts:

ElspethFlashman · 06/08/2018 11:22

I also read another story about someone (I think it was someone like Al Pacino or Robert De Niro or Jack Nicholson) who always refused autographs at baseball games. The reason was cos the person waiting for the autograph would stand there and completely block the view of everyone behind, and once other people saw someone getting an autograph there would literally be a line of people across the seats. And it wasn't fair to the people behind who'd paid for their tickets to see the game.

Original poster

Aprilsinparis · 06/08/2018 11:24

LikeIDo1 The shop assistants.

OP posts:

theOtherPamAyres · 06/08/2018 11:24

People should be civil when approaching celebrities - or at least by aware that they may be intruding.

A rock star and his wife were having an argument in a street. I slowed down.

From what I could gather they were late because he said he knew the way, but he didn't, and wouldn't ask for directions. It was something like that.

It probably wasn't the right time to approach him and ask for a selfie, but that didn't stop a middle-aged man with a bad case of hero-worship. He actually stood beside them, smiling, waiting for a break in the sniping and recriminations, fiddling with his phone, and lining up a shot.

NoProbLlama78 · 06/08/2018 11:25

If they're at an appearance or meeting people backstage after a show or doing some sort of event they should be friendly and civil. If they're having lunch with family or something they should be left alone.

JacquesHammer · 06/08/2018 11:25

Whilst they're meeting fans as part of their work (meet and greets, book signings etc) then yes, celebrities should always be pleasant.

Out and about then no, they should be permitted to go about their day unhindered like anyone else.

I think the OP's situation is slightly different in that the celebrity wasn't approached for an autograph; and in fact like any other member of the public might have been. However it is easy to see how it could be the final straw.

Mousefunky · 06/08/2018 11:26

I’ve seen a couple of TV ‘celebs’ in public before and I’ve never approached them. I was with my DM when we saw one out with his family for the day, she really wanted to approach for a photo and I told her not to. They are normal people with families and they deserve privacy.

GetInTheBin · 06/08/2018 11:27

Meh. I'm "known". I'm nice when I'm working, usually nice when I'm not, but I don't always want to talk or do something else when I'm trying to live my life. For every 10 nice people to chat to me about what I do, there's always 1 scary/creepy/over obsessed person. Makes you weary and wary.

sleepsleepandmoresleep · 06/08/2018 11:27

I always think of how annoyed I feel when I'm walking down the local high street and the charity chuggers approach me ten times in an hour. It's infuriating and I hear no end of people moan about it. I normally start with a polite 'no thank you' and by the end of my trip either ignore them or am down to a curt 'no'.

That's what I think it must feel like being a celeb. Imagine that, all the bloody time. No thanks!

YABU OP. Unless the celeb is in a work situation where they can reasonably be expected to be interacting with fans as part of the job then leave them to it or don't be surprised when they're less than pleased to be bothered.

scarbados · 06/08/2018 11:28

My husband's late uncle was a professional musician and famous in his genre. He regularly used to be asked for autographs and selfies while erm ... occupied at public loo urinals. When he died, there were a lot of famous people at his funeral - as we arrived at the crematorium there were people rushing across to ask for selfies. At a bloody funeral!

AlonsosLeftPinky · 06/08/2018 11:29

EVERYBODY should be civil. And that extends to not intruding on someone's personal time uninvited.

loveka · 06/08/2018 11:29

IDont. Really, really most peole in Eastenders have become actors because they want to be actors. I don't watch it, but know plenty of people who have been in it. Eastenders is a working actors job.

They may have wanted a career at the RSC or the National Theatre, or in film but that doesn't happen for everyone.

bimbobaggins · 06/08/2018 11:30

That’s a bit harsh racecar , it’s rude to speak to a stranger unless to say sorry or warn of danger?? Never heard of that before and glad I don’t live like that.

VanGoghsDog · 06/08/2018 11:31

Your nieve was quite rude talking to a complete stranger for any reason other than to say sorry or to warn them of an emergency. The celebrity thing is a red herring here.

Well, that's abject nonsense isn't it? I told a woman in the street the other day that I loved her shoes, she looked pleased as punch. So, I was 'quite rude' was I? Don't think I was.

I was also sitting next to a young girl on the Tube who was trying to tell her dad about the 'driverless train' but couldn't remember which one it was, and he didn't know, so I told her DLR is driverless, and she seemed happy enough.

Maybe I'll just stop being pleasant to people if it's so rude!

IDontEatFriedTurtle · 06/08/2018 11:35

Your nieve was quite rude talking to a complete stranger for any reason other than to say sorry or to warn them of an emergency.

That is completely bonkers and you know that.

LikeIDo1 · 06/08/2018 11:36

The celeb probably thought your niece knew who she was then and didn't want to be approached that day.

It applies across the board on any jobs. A shop assistant in Asda has to be polite and friendly to customers whilst at work but outside of work they don't have to smile at you if they don't want to Work hat vs out of work hat!

IDontEatFriedTurtle · 06/08/2018 11:36

How would you ever actually get to know anyone if that were true? Don't make any friends except in natural disasters?

Timefortea99 · 06/08/2018 11:38

I used to live in central London. I have seen many celebs, never once felt the need to disturb them as they go about their business. As someone mentioned above, how annoying it is to walk down a High St and chuggers etc punctuate your walk with requests for you to stop, how annoying that is. It must be a million times worse for celebs.

Some celebs do court attention - the ones who have no discernible talent but whose fame is reliant on being seen. But the ones who aren’t reality show fodder are just living their lives. They are human, they have off days, their budgie May have diet, their bunions may be a throbbing, late for an appointment, want to spend quality time with their family.

I was in a shopping centre in Bristol and this young girl (extremely beautiful, fantastic clothes, looked out of place) was being chased by a disparate group of people clutching phones, trying to film as they went. They looked crazed. I have no idea who she was but she looked scared. It was bloody ridiculous.

MaMaMaBelle · 06/08/2018 11:38

Your nieve was quite rude talking to a complete stranger for any reason other than to say sorry or to warn them of an emergency

Really? So you've never struck up a conversation with someone on the train or in a shop etc?

Paddley · 06/08/2018 11:40

If I was famous I absolutely know I would be rude to members of the public if they caught me at a bad moment. Because I'm a human being not a robot.

I'd be named a dozen times on one of those horrible celebrity threads.

DarlingNikita · 06/08/2018 11:40

Thingy from East Enders isn't doing it for the love of the craft

That's just snobbish. Soap sets are one of the most tough and disciplined professional environments out there. More than one actor has cited their start in a soap as being the best training they could have asked for.

MaMaMaBelle · 06/08/2018 11:41

Cross posted with a few of you there!

wizzywig · 06/08/2018 11:44

Im assuming anyome in a public type role like teachers, doctors, priests etc similarly just want to get on with buying their athletes foot cream in private in their freetime

slinkysaluki · 06/08/2018 11:44

I was at Southend on Sea one day at Adventureland with my kids. Rid Stewart and Penny Lancaster were there with their kids. No way I'd have approached them
It was their family time.

Also saw Dennis Wise and his family and Vic Reeves and his family on days out, again would never approach in their private time.

Sometimes it's just not appropriate

RideOn · 06/08/2018 11:46

Making friends only when there is natural disaster

HelpTheTigers · 06/08/2018 11:48

I have the start of a thread that I'm considering posting, with photographic evidence of a really offensive word (in my opinion) that a celebrity wrote when signing my book at an official event. I no longer have any respect or regard for that person and he ruined my evening and put a damper on my day for the next few days.

I've been in touch with the MN mods and they have agreed that it's ok to post although any legal backlash would be my responsibility, which is fine. The evidence is all there in black, white and red though.

Otherwise, it would drive me nuts if people approached me constantly although I hope that I would be polite to everyone. Not that I'm ever going to be in that sort of position! Maybe your celebrity was having a bad day.

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