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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Celebrities should at least be civil?

133 replies

Aprilsinparis · 06/08/2018 10:26

AIBU to at least expect Celeb's to be civil, when approached. I understand they may be having a bad day, but because they are celeb's the impression they leave with fans will last a life time good or bad.

OP posts:
allertse · 06/08/2018 10:53

Only if it's a work event.

I don't agree that they "owe it" to their fans when they're just out and about. Watch their shows/movies, listen to their songs, watch their sports if you like them. All they "owe you" as a fan is the best performance they can do.

Fabellini · 06/08/2018 10:56

Wait...what? So your niece didn’t approach them then? So you’ve no idea if they would have been “civil” or not?

DarlingNikita · 06/08/2018 10:56

I think it's civil to leave them alone, generally, when they're obviously buying loo roll/trying to talk to their kids etc.

In this case though I agree; your niece didn't approach her because she was famous but with the kind of query I might approach a non-celeb with. Assuming she was polite I think it's only decent to be polite back.

LikeIDo1 · 06/08/2018 10:56

So how did your niece find out she was a celeb after she approached them?

ColumboHere · 06/08/2018 11:00

Why celebrities though OP. If the person wasn't a celebrity and was rude to your niece would you still make an issue of it. Or are celebrities some special breed to you?

Willow2017 · 06/08/2018 11:03

So until you found out they were a 'celeb' you wouldnt have bothered posting to complain about them?

morningconstitutional2017 · 06/08/2018 11:04

Everyone deserves privacy, famous or not. I would expect civility of course if ever I were to approach someone famous in a shop or cafe etc but I wouldn't dream of doing so - I figure they're there as a private individual rather than in their professional capacity.

We have a famous actress living nearby and I saw her coming out of a supermarket but no way would I corner her for an autograph or selfie - I just don't think it's the right place and time.

Fallofrain · 06/08/2018 11:06

Difficulty is the frequency too. I went to an event and was sat near a vaguely famous person. They were polite but fans were just relentless. They left in front of me and people were "just asking for an autograph", fans seemed polite etc but literally i recon they got about 3 steps each time before people stopped them again. Watching them trying to eat was painful. Each mouthful was punctuated buy a new selfie request. I lost my patience just with people bumping my chair on the way to her!

I have a lot more respect for why people might decline autograph or pictures now.

I think the carpool karaoke with Paul McCartney was telling. He walked into a house and 15 min later people were swarmed outside, all wishing him well etc but that would drive me mad!

Fallofrain · 06/08/2018 11:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn - duplicate post.

RiceandBeans · 06/08/2018 11:07

AIBU to at least expect Celeb's to be civil, when approached

YABU. Why would you randomly approach someone? Just because someone is a public figure it doesn't give you the right as someone unknown to them to approach them. They are not public property. Sheesh!

MorningsEleven · 06/08/2018 11:08

You've just reminded me that I fell in love with a woman's jacket at Pride this weekend. And now I'm £45 lighter🤨. Jacket owning woman was lovely and very happy to share shopping tips.

hannnnnnnxo · 06/08/2018 11:10

No not at all. They shouldn’t be forced to chat, take photos/videos etc everywhere they go, they deserve privacy and a break. There’s a time and a place

SnowOnTheSeine · 06/08/2018 11:11

I was once on holiday in an AI hotel complex and an incredibly famous French singer-composer (he's written for himself but also Celine Dion, Johnny Hallyday etc.) was there.

Poor bloke was almost never left alone. We saw him every night at dinner (they ate "early" (7pm) like us - probably to avoid the crowds) and I also ended up swimming most days at the same time as him.

People would actually interupt his swim to tell him they liked such and such song (literally tapping him on the shoulder as he swam). He was ever so polite, but I couldn't believe that he was getting so much hassle.

Bibesia · 06/08/2018 11:11

The problem is that your niece may have been the umpteenth person approaching this person when she wanted a bit of peace. Put yourself in the celebrity's place - could you guarantee that, when you go out somewhere wanting to do whatever it is in peace, you will be sweet and nice to absolutely everyone who hassles you?

IDontEatFriedTurtle · 06/08/2018 11:12

But actors? They do it because they want to act, not have people approach them every 5 minutes

Actors on stage, amateur dramatic actors, actors in independent films etc. They all do it because they like acting.

Thingy from East Enders isn't doing it for the love of the craft. Hmm If you have become "famous" and weren't born into it (royalty) you chose it, and you courted it. That doesn't mean they shouldn't get privacy or that their children should be hassled but if you're at Starbucks and a kid asks about your jacket, suck it up and don't be a knob.

Norma27 · 06/08/2018 11:13

Even at their ‘work’it can be difficult too. I was recently at the Athletics British Championships and Paula Radcliffe walked past. I don’t particularly have an opinion of her but I felt so sorry for her. She was obviously on her way to the booth to be a commentator and even though she kept looking at her watch and was looking quite worried, more and more people kept piling over.
She seemed really lovely and took so many selfies and signed autographs for so many people. I don’t know if she ended up being late getting to where she had to be.

IDontEatFriedTurtle · 06/08/2018 11:13

If people weren't interested in their autograph they wouldn't continue to get the money and the parts they want. So they're happy enough to use their face to sell seats in theatres.

MrsSnootyPants2018 · 06/08/2018 11:14

You could have been the 100th personnto bother them that day and I'd hate it!

If you recognised it as a celeb you could have just said " they might have been bothered a lot today don't take it personally"

Just because they're famous doesn't mean they can't be annoyed when trying to have some downtime which is ruined.

allertse · 06/08/2018 11:14

@Aprilsinparis If I stopped someone to ask where their jacket was from and they were rude to me, I'd probably be annoyed - when it occasionally happens to me I see it as a huge compliment! But if I later found out they were a celebrity I hadn't recognised, I'd be far less annoyed, because I'd understand how irritating it is being bothered constantly...

DontDrinkDontSmoke · 06/08/2018 11:14

I was staying in a hotel Michael Bublé was staying. Witnessed him arriving back after a gig and an English man running the full length of reception from the bar to the lifts to grab MB and put him in a headlock shouting at his wife to catch up with their camera. Michael Bublé had just pressed the button for his lift and was in no way being “starry”. He refused pictures, shook himself free of the bloke and went on his way. The bloke and his wife spent the rest of the evening in the bar loudly going on about Michael Bublé being up himself.

I saw him the following day with fans and there’s no way that guy is up himself.

ElspethFlashman · 06/08/2018 11:16

I remember reading an article with SJP where she said the downside was that she always had to be pleasant in public, no matter what. She said she had really shitty rude service in shops and she could never ask to talk to the Manager, cos then the story would be "SJP is a bitch".

ppeatfruit · 06/08/2018 11:18

DS went to school with quite few 'celebrity' actors' children. He was good friends with a boy whose parents are both famous, the mum was very off ( I had said nothing to her, we were just arranging pick up details on the phone) but her dh was lovely, he collected and obviously knew we 'knew' who he was but he was friendly and polite.

It depends on the personalities of the people I suppose.

BuggerOffAndGoodDayToYou · 06/08/2018 11:20

I would never approach a celeb unless they were in a “working” situation. So at a book signing or similar appearance = fair game. However, when Sean Bean sat at the table next to me in a restaurant I smiled at him and carried on my discussion with DH despite the fact that we are huge fans of the Sharp series and would have LOVED to ask him about it.

In the same way that if I see one of our parents when I’m out shopping I do not expect to be stopped and asked about term dates or dinner money balances.

Racecardriver · 06/08/2018 11:21

Your nieve was quite rude talking to a complete stranger for any reason other than to say sorry or to warn them of an emergency. The celebrity thing is a red herring here.

hearmyvoice · 06/08/2018 11:21

I do understand that famous people deserve to be able to do normal things without being bothered but like the actor I mentioned earlier, a lot of actors are in it for the recognition too but can't just expect everyone to admire them from afar and never bother them.
In the toilets or out eating, with kids, in those situations they should be left alone.