Demonisation of formula!!!

[Summertimehaze]

Don’t know if anyone watched the Dispatches programme last night on breastfeeding? The more I think about that programme the more annoyed I’m getting!!! The demonisation of formula really doesn’t help mothers who struggle to breastfeed and have to start using formula or even as a top up!! Most mothers want to do what’s right for their babies and know that breast is best. But some mums just can’t do it and so formula literally becomes a lifesaver. I’m sick of seeing mums feel so guilty about it and letting their children bloody starve because they surely can’t give them the evil formula!!!!!! The programme basically tells a new mum that it’s really tough to breastfeed, there is no support, they will be judged BUT formula is not an option!!! Grrrrrrrrr 😡. AIBU

It's difficult because something is obviously not working in Britain for us to have such low breastfeeding rates. It's obviously not that we have more women who are unable to breastfeed than other countries, which suggests it's either lack of support or some sort of social stigma around breastfeeding –both of which are things that need to be tackled. It's less to do with formula being the work of the devil than changing perceptions and support options so that breastfeeding is accessible and desirable to more women –and so more women know the benefits of it but also are prepared for how difficult it will be.

There was a statistic in the show: '40 per cent of women who stop breastfeeding by six weeks cite being judged, discouraged and shamed in public as a main reason.'

This is not good enough. We have to do better.

Lots of posters who haven't watched the programme commenting and agreeing with the op. I find that odd. Surely you can only have an opinion on if the programme demonised ff if you watched it. Comments about 'guilt' and general 'demonising' of ff is not what the post is about. Although I see that these types of threads often get hijacked and become a typical diatribe about bf v ff.

Having ff one and bf the other I find these discussions frustrating.

Surely we can talk about the lack of support for breastfeeding without it becoming an attack of formula feeding?

It has been described as a cruelty to tell women all the reasons why breastmilk is the best start for babies but yet not provide the necessary support for them to maintain it.

It is my belief that breastmilk IS the best start for babies but formula feeding is not poison and it is perfectly good as a substitute. I can’t see why that is so hard to accept.

Well, I can. It’s because women are so used to accepting the burden of guilt for every single choice and circumstance

🤷🏽‍♀️

Formula feed if you need to, that’s fine. Nothing wrong with pointing out that breast milk is better on every count than formula. Of course formula is better than no milk. But we’re so scared of offending people we twist ourselves into lies just to keep people happy. Breastfeeding is better for the baby. But pushing a woman to breastfeed without any support is terrible for the mother. We need to invest more money in supporting breastfeeding. There is no point bringing guilt into this unless you voted for this government and voted to have our healthcare system slashed. Then you should feel guilty for a whole lot more than formula feeding.

But please stop pretending like British women are just a different species who somehow can’t produce breast milk. There isn’t enough support and education. That’s why BF rates are so appallingly low in this country compared to the US or other similar developed countries. Pointing that out is not a means to guilt trip women who are formula feeding.

Also redirect your anger. If you had to formula feed because of inadequate support, direct your anger at the lack of lactation consultants and specialists available to new mums, lack of consistent training for health visitors, or lack of ongoing support and practical advice. Don't be defensive about it. I know it's hard if you feel like someone is insinuating you aren't doing the best for your child, but it doesn't do anyone favours to say stuff like 'Formula feeding is just as good' or 'My DC was formula-fed and is completely healthy!'. That's not helpful information. What is helpful is recognising the reasons women are unable to continue breastfeeding and finding out how to fix that.

I watched some of this and turned it over after a bit. It was good in parts, but a lot of it was very ignorant, lacking in empathy and a bit of an ego trip for the presenter I felt? Sorry if that’s a bit harsh. I don’t like to slag off women in the public eye but that was the impression I got.

The bit which was great I thought was when they interviewed someone from the ILCGB and she was saying what I’ve thought many times (and said on here many times). Something like “giving women this lovely long list of benefits their baby will get if they are breastfed but then not providing support to help mothers trying to breastfeed is inhumane”.

The bit which I found really ignorant was a comment from the scientist talking about the beneficial ‘ingredients’ in bm saying, something liked “if people knew about this I would like to THINK they would make better decisions based on this information”. As if it’s a simple choice! I want to breastfeed. Boom. Done .

And I say this as someone who is very much invested in the benefits of breast milk as I exclusively pump for my 6mo. It’s not an easy way to do things, so I’m definitely not someone who is anti breast milk in any way.

havent watched the programme so cannot directly comment on it.
That being said this country needs to get its breastfeeding rates up- not every mother who formula feeds has a baby with tongue tie or a poor milk supply- some people just reach for formula and that is who I imagine these programmes are aimed at.
People that scream "fed is best" are not helpful. How about education and support is best!

I don't understand why on mumsnet it is impossible to discuss breastfeeding without upsetting / offending people who formula feed. Each method of feeding presents its own sets of challenges and disadvantages. I don't doubt people who have tried breastfeeding and couldn't feel upset and guilty but that programme was fighting your corner - had you been given more / better support, it may have allowed breastfeeding to continue. If you chose to formula feed then that's fine. No one is demonising formula- it is a fact that breast milk does have a few more benefits than formula but it's a perfectly acceptable alternative. I don't know how people who don't breastfeed can possibly know whether those who do encounter negative comments from others about it. I do breastfeed and have had several negative / unhelpful comments. I hope programmes like Breastfeeding Uncovered can go some way to teach people why behaving like that is wrong. Rates of breastfeeding are low in this country. Normalising breastfeeding and educating people about it is not a criticism on those who ff. It is a way of encouraging future mothers to bf and seek appropriate help if they struggle. I'm sorry if you are still upset by your experience but I don't think that means mothers who breastfeed should shut up about it. We are entitled to talk about our experiences just as much as you.

@RosiePosy4 Where is your evidence that "formula is a poor second best"?

If you have a group of 2/3 year olds, can you tell who was BF and who was FF?

Formula today is manufactured to be as close to BM as possible not like in the 40s and 50s where some women had to water down condensed milk to give to their babies.

Baby feeding is such a touchy subject because it’s so difficult to talk about offence arising around the issue of breast or formula milk.

Many posters will come along and say we should support women’s own choices for how they want to feed their baby - but surely the point is that 80% of women would ideally choose to breast feed (and continue if they had the support) and we have very low breastfeeding rates in contrast with other comparable countries?

The aim of the programme I assume (though it didn’t seem well structured or reach a conclusion!) was to look at why so many women don’t feel supported in their first choice and how to improve it.

I have it on my watch list but haven't seen it yet so my comments may not be worth much.

I thought it was more about wanting to feed but not having the support? I suppose I'll find out when I see it. If it is that would ring true for me as I asked for help feeding tongue tied DS in hospital and after an hour of walking up and down with a screaming baby while they said someone was coming to help, gave up waiting and asked for formula which they brought in about 3 mins. That was pretty shocking to me considering how much my hospital and all the antenatal stuff focus on breastfeeding.

I watched it and didn't come away with a negative feeling at all. They did acknowledge that there is personal choice but that there are a lot of women who don't start or give up because of society and lack of support. I bf for 3 months both times but was mighty relieved to get my boobs back and move onto formula after that. My mum didn't bf at all. She was a great mum.

I didn't watch it for exactly this reason. I chose not to breastfeed - it was the best decision for our family. DS was also lactose intolerant so needed lactose free formula. I have a bright, healthy or who, ironically, he's ill far fewer times than his exclusively bf peers.

Fed is best. Happy mums and happy babies are best.

Such interesting replies, thank you. I guess everyone has their personal story and maybe I’m coming at this with my own “feeding baggage”. To cut a very long story short ... my LO would not latch. And I HAD support of midwives and lactation consultants. It just didn’t happen. So I pumped around the clock for her for over 3 months when I had to give it up for my sanity! The guilt and pressure I felt having to combi feed her formula was was palpable. Programmes like this of course are focusing on the lack of support for mothers with BF but the formula bashing helps no one either!!!! The scientist was particularly condemning. In my experience, mothers who want to BF do not just shrug and reach for the formula happily if it doesn’t work out ... they feel an over whelming sense of shame and inadequate. Well ... this is certainly how I felt. Maybe it’s all just too close to home for me 🤷‍♀️

I didn’t watch it. I’ve got a 9 week dd and I’m still bitter that breastfeeding hasn’t worked out for us after trying for 7 weeks and seeking endless support including dd having a tounge tie cut.
I think sadly, the reason I feel so bad that bf hasn’t worked out for me is because how I’m made to feel from others. Even health professionals. When asked if I’m breastfeeding, I say no and get a disapproving look, then a quick ‘well, it doesn’t matter’. They didn’t see me in tears all day every day for weeks or crying to my mum because I didn’t like my dd and regretted having her or begging my husband not to go to work because I didn’t want to be left with her, all because I couldn’t bf and felt crap about it.

I watch a bit if the show. I did think find it intestine about all the different things in breast milk that cannot be replicated in formula. I didn't know about pain relieving qualities for an infant who bf.

Iv fed both. U have no doubt breast milk is better BUT bf is incredibly tough and most woman don't have a good support network to help them

The actual evidence behind ‘breast is best’ is actually very weak - in the West with generally good nutrition there is hardly any difference between the two. Of quoted statements regarding things like IQ are based on studies with huge confounding variables.

Why do those who formula feed get so offended as soon as the benefits of breast milk are mentioned? The main thing is baby is fed and happy, and everyone has a choice.

A country like this should not have such poor breastfeeding rates , and many who turn to formula following difficulties could have continued with the right support. That’s what the programme was focusing on. It didn’t demonise formula at all.

Many women can’t or don’t want to breastfeed, but you don’t see so much outrage from breastfeeding mums when formula is mentioned 🤷🏻‍♀️

An occasional reminder that formula is a poor second best is not a bad thing imo

"poor second best"

second best maybe, but keeps babies alive - not poor.

But the fact is the vast majority of babies are ff and healthy. That shouldn't be swept under the carpet.

We all know the benefits. In this country the struggle to feed for many simple isn't worth the benefits particularly when you factor in the lack of support.

Why are there never ever documentaries re what babies and toddlers are weaned onto or what children are fed on or how much screen time they're being subjected to? We only this week had the education secretary highlighting the national scandal which is how literary unready vast numbers of children are prior to starting school. It has catastrophic impact on the futures of many children. Ditto the amount of shit many children are fed on and by shit I mean proper shit not a highly regulated perfectly healthy food such as formula. Last month the levels of obesity in 11 year olds was highlighted.Why no documentaries or angst re either?

I did not want to breastfeed. The thought of it made my skin crawl, I cannot explain why it just did. I formula fed mine and they grew well , were and are healthy. I agree fed is best.

Before the program I was actually discussing this with a friend and agree with pps that the people who try to bf but can’t, aren’t the government / pro-bf groups’ main concern. I think they want to get to a point where everyone tries, so stats go up. This is why they promote it to everyone. I get it. It used to be in certain areas and especially within the working class, people would say “oh no, not for me thanks. I don’t want to get my boobs out in public” etc. I think actually they have done a good job of promoting bf now and there is a lot less of these attitudes, thankfully. The problem is now, when people try and “fail” to do it. There does need to be much, much more and better support in this area.

My son (who I’m exclusively pumping for) was TT, but the idiotic mw responsible to diagnosing TT where I live missed it twice, despite me being referred to her by a bf counsellor. By the time it was finally snipped (by nhs consultant) at 3 mo, ds was so used to EBM from a bottle that he developed a preference for that, which is why I’m having to pump 🤷‍♀️.

It’s really irksome, and I agree that this is what we should be getting angry about. It just isn’t helpful when even the ‘experts’ say “oh if everyone knew how much better bm was they’d CHOOSE to bf”. I think the vast, vast majority of mums would choose if it was as simple as just saying “I’m bfing”. More education and more support is best. I like that, whoever said it.... katniss was it?

I found the follow-on milk con thing interesting!

Bet a couple of years down the line said presenter of Dispatches will be feeding her baby red meat,sugar etc and introducing it to the delights of her mobile phone without feeling the need to make a documentary about it. Funny that.

Breastfeeding rates are appallingly low in this country, many mothers reach straight for formula

And how exactly do you know how mothers make their choices about feeding their babies? It is this kind of smug ignorance that puts people's backs up. You have no right to state that using formula is the first or easiest choice for anyone.