How can people speak to their dc like this.. So sad

[INeedMoreCakeInMyLife]

So went shopping this morning. As going bk to car there was a lady having a full on rage at her young DS. He was approx 3-4 years old.. He was screaming and crying. (obviously I have no idea why)
She was saying just get in the fing car. Sometimes you're such a little prick! He said ' I'm goingto run away from here.'
To which she said good ill put the bastard flags out and pack Your bags, have some fing respect I'm your mother.
With that an older gentleman looked up to her and said. Your child will never have respect for you if you speak like that.. Maybe if you spoke calmly he would calm down.
She said you don't know me, or what kind of day I've had , how dare you judge me! (he then took a photo of her and her reg plate?)

It was awful.. I know we all have bad days, but really? Speaking like that to a young child?
It makes me. Wonder what Goes. On Begind closed doors.. Poor child.

I actually called the police on a situation like this once. I was deeply concerned for the child. They had already had another call and blue lights arrived while I was on the phone.

You might think an overreaction but I couldn't have lived with myself if I didn't do something and could tell that talking to the person was likely to involve physical violence towards me (I was with my children). Very sad. I think about that child a lot and wonder how he is.

Mummyto3 I can see how very difficult it must be for you to see that behaviour. Much for you.

It is hard and forever will be. Children are a blessing. 6 weeks later I gave birth to her sister. It's been a hell of a journey. As well as having my 10 year old too. Why do people have kids. What would they do if they lost them.. how would they feel. Broken hearted isn't close to how im feeling

Why are there actually apologists for shit parenting? In what universe is it appropriate for an adult to swear like that to a young child? All it is teaching that child is how to normalise swearing and aggression. Imagine what's going to happen to that child at school......at work......in their adult relationships.

I think it comes from a place of ‘theyre mine I can talk to them/ raise them how I want’.
There is no universal way to raise a child but because you created a life doesn’t give you the right to speak to them as if they are any less human. If it were a husband and wife and one was saying these sorts of things to the other we would tell them to leave that person because it’s emotional abuse but somehow when it’s their own children, it’s okay because theyre having a hard time, they’re stressed ‘it doesn’t count as abuse’ when in actual fact it’s worse, children can’t leave, they can’t stand up for themselves, they are dependent and they didn’t choose to be in that situation. It’s maddening. There is no excuse.

For lots of people, swearing isn't a big deal. It also has nothing to do with respect so that seems an odd conclusion for the old man to draw.

It has everything to do with respect. Come into my work place swearing and security will kick you out. Swear at the police and you'll get arrested. Excessive abusive swearing is not acceptable in our society, especially when aimed at kids. Just because a parent thinks it is doesn't mean society should lower its standards to that!

Honestly, some of the things dc are in their lives is absolutely unbelievable to the majority of us.

I had an experience at the beach one where a grandmother was talking to her hamrandaughter like this because she dared to sit in the boot withought removing wellies, then granny proceeded to pick up her massive fucking hairy dog soaked and cover in sand and put it in the boot of the car. She was calling the little girl names, swearing at her, it was horrendous. What made it worse the child's mother was there and did nothing.
Anger and shock got the better of me and I went over and told her exactly what I thought and took her reg.
I have never heard a child spoken to like that. It was so degrading for the little girl. My heart broke for her.

Another who is pleased the guy took her picture and hopefully sent it to SS - Child abuse is so prevalent because so many turn a blind eye.

As for the 'snapshot' brigade - see above. Child abuse is prevalent because so many turn a blind eye. To do something so vile as a parent calling her child a prick and swearing at him/her? It's nothing to do with 'well we swear in my family' and normalising it - You will no doubt give a damn but yes, I bloody well judge you - as common, dragged up and dragging your poor children up. And If I'd witnessed what OP had I'd definitely say something at the time and have - I got a mouthful of abuse in return but she did actually have the grace to look embarrassed and I'd like to think it may have stopped her - very much doubt it though sadly

I wouldn't use those words to anyone. Really hate the c word. Makes me cringe every time I hear it.
As for the bad parenting remember you reap what you sow.

I can’t think of a circumstance where that’s ok even as a “snapshot”

This. I’m glad the man spoke to her and I don’t know what he’ll do with photo but hopefully it might lead to the mother getting some help.

My neighbours behave like this - it’s vile and I always think that if they’re prepared to behave like that in public, what are they like behind closed doors

I know it isn’t just a one off snap shot in a stressy day. They, especially the step dad, speak to the son like it all the time.

“Fucking cunt” “you fucking gay bastard” “just fuck off, I fucking hate you” are a few of the highlights from the weekend.

I seen them out and about in public a lot - totally different, until the mask slips and they forget themselves.

I’ve reported it several times, as have the neighbours the other side but nothing seems to have changed.

Nobody should be spoken to like this let alone a child. I don't care how stressed out a parent is, it's just not right. I feel sorry for the child because that's how he'll learn to talk to others. There are so many other ways to convey frustration without using mean language.

Much love to you mummyto3