Is it appropriate to wear a very very low cut wedding dress?

[mydogisthebest]

A friend has posted photos of a wedding she went to yesterday. When I saw photos of the bride I actually felt quite shocked.

Her wedding dress was so low cut you could actually see part of her nipples. She was bursting out of the dress and it looked about 3 sizes too small.

It was a church wedding and I feel it was really inappropriate to wear such a dress. A non church wedding would not have been so bad although the dress would still have looked tacky

So inappropriate for a church wedding.
She'll cringe in a few years no doubt

I don't understand how someone can dress like that in front of their father and grandfather let alone the vicar or minister.

Can you post the pic and fuzz out her face? She'll never know it was you

It do not think it will make a difference in the eyes of God, only in the eyes of mankind.
If it's a sin, it is so inside or outside the church, and if it's not, then he won't mind will he?

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone - but don't bend over to pick it up in case you flash anything!

Of course YANBU.
However, there are many MNers who don't feel anyone can have an opinion on another person's clothes choices.

In the eyes of God 😂 Give over, it's not the middle ages!

If it's not in the eyes of God then why are people objecting and claiming some sanctity about the church building?
If they don't believe in a God, what difference does it make?
If they do, then it's only God that matters, not them.

As for her middle - that would have them in rages not ages!

It's got nothing to do with the religious beliefs of the bride and everything to do with respecting the religion of the building you are in.
I wouldn't wear shoes in a mosque and I wouldn't wear something low cut in a church. It comes across as disrespectful.

I think a lot of it comes down to the fact that a lot of couples marry in a church because of the aesthetics and 'pretty pictures', which means they don't actually take in to consideration the religious implications to their wedding.

If churches stopped marrying all and sundry, unless they attended service regularly, it might diminish the problem.

I’ve just left a clothing group where the queen bee constantly posts pictures of all but her nipples showing in whatever her outfit of the day is, including what she wore to a work meeting. I agree with the ‘teach your sons not to rape’ and people should wear what they want, but I don’t see the need to have pretty much everything hanging out. IMO, it looks shit.

Yes, I’m judgey and I couldn’t care less if that offends.

LOL, hold on, the vows - the actual vows are 'supposedly' before God, and you're talking about respecting the views of the religion?

So lets get this right - a low cut dress is an absolute affront to the views of the religion, but the vows to their God (which is not believed in) - that's 'ok'.

Oh the irony of that.

If it's not in the eyes of God then why are people objecting and claiming some sanctity about the church building?

Because you are using a religious building and should respect that religion while you are in it. I'm an atheist but I cover my hair and take my shoes off in a mosque, and don't show my nipples (or shoulders, personally) in a church.
It's just basic politeness. If you don't have any respect for the religion, don't use it's buildings for your ceremonies.

Shambu. Oh do fuck off with the very Essex thing. It’s very old hat and boring now. 🙄

Because you are using a religious building and should respect that religion while you are in it. I'm an atheist but I cover my hair and take my shoes off in a mosque, and don't show my nipples (or shoulders, personally) in a church.
It's just basic politeness. If you don't have any respect for the religion, don't use it's buildings for your ceremonies.

That's missing the entire point. The whole point of their religion is their belief in God. A low cut dress might be an affront to their God, but nowhere near as much as making a vow before a God you don't believe in!

The uproar is about the dress, not the actual great big lie of the vows before God (when really they just want a nice building). That's the irony!

It's not missing the point, it IS the point. Your whataboutery misses the point. The topic at hand isn;t about people making vows they don;t beleive in (there are many such threads on same if you want to find out what people think), this one is specifically about clothing. Not vows. So yes, on a thread about a dress, the conversation is focused on the dress.
Odd that.

It's not though, it's the condemnation of the dress BECAUSE it's in a church. What difference does the building make? - the sanctity, and where's the sanctity coming from - God.

People are saying 'not appropriate for a church' - that's the key. I'm questioning what difference it makes if it's a church or not - which is where people say 'because it's not respectful to the religion' - hence the irony of the whole faux outrage.

Your words:

Because you are using a religious building and should respect that religion

That's the irony right there. That comment suggests it's ok outside of a church. You can't separate the religious argument you're using and then bypass God! You're saying 'the dress is wrong in God's house'. You've not even seen the dress!

I didn't say anything about gods house. Its disrespectful to the people who beleive, whos church it is. Its not difficult to follow. They have expectations about dress, you follow them. It's called "not being a dick".

The church is God's house. That's what their religion states.
You're knocking a woman you don't know, about a dress you've not seen, and saying it's disrespectful to a religion. And I'm explaining how that's a little ironic given the dress is the least of the affronts to their religion when you consider the vows being made.

We have no idea why the dress was the way it was, and it might have been an unfortunate fit for her. That's not necessarily disrespectful, it's just unlucky.

I think this woman's more likely to be condemned by Mumsnet than the church or God.

@perfectstorm I am very sorry to hear what you are going through My friend went through the same and her reconstruction was amazing - her scars were a circular one around where her nipple used to be and a low one below her bikini line - she wore a bikini on holiday with us for the first time in years and looked amazing, she said it was the only good thing about her treatment. I hope it’s the same for you.

You're knocking a woman you don't know, about a dress you've not seen, and saying it's disrespectful to a religion. And I'm explaining how that's a little ironic given the dress is the least of the affronts to their religion when you consider the vows being made

Its not abou any woman, we're talking about a concept. None of us know her, she may not even exist, so we are basically talking hypothetically.
If you would like to talk about the hypocrisy of taking vows you don't believe, we can do that too. But you are missing the point. We're talking specifically about clothes, not vows. Not sure why you are so confused, its very well explained?

perfectstorm What a lovely positive post and attitude to have towards other women. I am sorry for what your going through, You are a true survivor and a very positive lady. Wishing you the best of luck with your journey

God hates cleavage and boobs!!!

I was convinced this was a stirring journo thread, but OP has previous posts

I wore a strapless dress when I got married in a church. I was there because it was a place of worship - before god. I checked with the vicar that it was ok, and she said she’d worn a strapless dress to her own wedding too. I think I looked fab, and I’m sure she looked fab too.

Its not abou any woman, we're talking about a concept. None of us know her, she may not even exist, so we are basically talking hypothetically.
If you would like to talk about the hypocrisy of taking vows you don't believe, we can do that too. But you are missing the point. We're talking specifically about clothes, not vows. Not sure why you are so confused, its very well explained?

Stop strawmanning, I know perfectly well what the conversation's about. But the condemnation of the dress was specifically about it being in a church and in your own words disrespecting the religion. You made a specific differentiation between wearing a dress elsewhere and wearing it in church. I'm questioning the rationale for that. How it's disrespectful to God (which is essentially the core of the religion). That question inevitably leads to the observation that the entire ceremony is disrespectful if people don't believe in God in the first place.

Nobody's managed to actually explain how God is supposed to be offended by this dress.