to be annoyed by people who let their kids run round supermarkets 'playing'

[ProperLavs]

Actually screaming and running into people.
I had an interesting 'conversation' with a woman when i muttered for someone to stop them screaming and running around. This woman, who didn't actually have anything to do with the kids, who were roughly 4 and 2, told me they were only playing.

I told her it was a very busy supermarket and they shouldn't be playing here
She then muttered about some people having to take their children shopping. I told her I had had to take all of mine (6 under 8) and no they were't ever allowed to run round screaming whilst I ignored them.
Wtf is wrong with people?

... and I'm also agreeing with QueenoftheSilverDollar's post. I'm going to take a leaf out of her book and start saying something rather then ruefully looking at the parent waiting for them to stop their child from running into people.

Your kids -> Your absolute responsibility

Audit and Queen's rels

I'm astounded any 'parent' even allowing their dc to enter any shop using a scooter, those awful heelies skates etc. It would just seem completely alien to me.

I had two older dc about 9,10 ish tousling and running around by me the other day and one stood on back of my flip flop. I turned with a load 'ouch!! do you mind'

Cannot stand it.

QueenoftheSilverDollar12 I'd have told you to wind your neck in had you spoke to me like that.

GreatDuck If I'd been Queen, I'd have told you to parent and stop being ineffective. Horses for courses, isn't it?

We choose to have children, it's up to us to stop them being a menace to other people and, if they are, then we've failed to parent. It's that simple really. Not terminal though and better that the behaviour's corrected before the rot really sets in.

I like kids a lot - other people's well-behaved children are also a joy to me.

GreatDuckCookery if your crap parenting impacts on those around you then people have every right to stick their necks out and say something.I guess you are one of those parents who lets their kids run round supermarkets and trains shouting an screaming,

Why? Someone had to do it...

It's so much easier these days as well. I mean there were none of these plastic trays on trolleys for car seats. None of these moulded plastic seats for babies . None of these lovely lightweight buggies that make getting on and off buses and round supermarkets easy.

Asbsoon as your legs worked you had to walk and sit in a trolley because those massive prams were a nightmare to push around shops.

We sure as hell didn't have the luxury if being able to watch Peppa pig on an iPhone whole mummy and daddy shopped

If people cant cope with all these modern day additions that make life alot easier than it was for our parents , and still wanna play all hard done by cos someone stepped up and controlled some tearaways then I dread to think what the next generation will be like tbh.

Yoir kids won't really remember having to sit still in a trolley for half an hour

That old person they knocked over though may well never step foot outside again through pure fear

Bit of an assumption that I have crap parenting skills. My dc are older now but when they were little they were always in a trolley or pram in the supermarket. No running or screaming.

Plus the dc in Queens post weren't running or screaming in the supermarket.

So many perfect parents with perfect children here.
I love this textbook MN reply.

People have entirely reasonable opinions about something which is largely considered negative.
Someone turns up 'oh there's so many perfect parents /perfect wives /perfect people /perfect children here'.

The idea that people can be less than perfect and still have an issue with poor attitide, rudeness and poor behaviour seems to escape some people.

@GreatDuckCookery and I'd have told you straight back to get yourself on a parenting course. Kids both want and need boundaries - that's basic behaviour management psychology. They need parameters, sanctions and rewards set by known and trusted adults. I'm a bloody good behaviour manager at school and I use techniques like this in loco parentis. I'm regularly given kids to work with whom others have reached the end of their tether.
So, quite frankly, you'd maybe regret telling me to wind my neck in as the rest of the plane who had endured Cressida and Tarquin's (not their real names, at least I don't think, I was being ironic for the benefit of the PP who missed it and said I was being sneery 🙄) offspring for the whole three hour flight. Get a grip and parent your kids instead of making excuses for their shoddy behaviour. You're to blame for that, not the kids.

greatduck let me help you here. Running and screaming are not the only forms of inappropriate and antisocial behaviour by children.

I think we've maybe touched a teeny weeny raw nerve with @GreatDuckCookery

queen I do this at work too ( school based). I am too I'm bloody good with the kids whom no one else can control. Sometimes I'm asked what I do. I can't work it out. Basically I call them on their shitty/ inappropriate behaviour and tell them to stop and get a grip. In between I am really nice to them. seems to work.

Exactly @ProperLavs kids need tough love in equal measures, especially those who don't get it at home.

The responses on this thread are really interesting. They definitely explain some posts I've seen previously on other threads from particular posters.

@WilburIsSomePig ??

Not at all Queen! I just don't agree with poking my nose in where it doesn't belong that's all.

Bloody hell. The whining posters complaining about feeling judged, sneery posts, and so on. As I said well before we heard about Audit's poor father, my big fear with my mum was her being knocked in a supermarket. She was frail and nervous at the best of times. So sorry for your Dad Audit and I hope he can regain full mobility and confidence. Same to all those who've experienced elderly loved ones on the receiving end of these mostly completely avoidable accidents.
For the affronted parents who are whinging about judging, negativity and how poop this makes them feel. This is who it is not directed at;

• Those who are with their DC and know what they are doing.
• Those making an effort to locate/catch etc a D.C. who has slipped off (as opposed to relishing the peace at others' expense)
• Those who are at least genuinely attempting to parent effectively when it goes go awry, as it undoubtedly will sometimes. Not feeble, "don't do that's" with zero commitment or consequences.

I say this as mum to a DD, now 11, who has had awful behaviour at times. My DS less so. But I never took an easy option. I shopped on line a lot or went out late at night when DH Home. I realise this won't work for everyone. When we had to go to a shop I'd have a chat about what was expected in car on way. I'd make DD have hand on trolley if she got unruly. I'd get down and talk sternly to her. No one else ever had to tell her off. Never once did I not know where she was. I'm not smug or boasty- I could have panic attacks at the mere thought if setting foot in a shop. But I never ever took the lazy option and let the DC impact, or worse, injure others. She did misbehave- none of this was perfect. But there were consequences and I always always followed through. Not forgot after. I've got some rage reading this. I for one would give my full support to any supermarket that property dealt with this issue. I was in a well known supermarket about two years ago, trying to keep my very frail DM safe, who wanted to go shopping herself, as well as parenting my two DC. Bloody hard. Past whizzes a child on balance bike. Straight past DM who luckily had me to grab, and straight past a member of staff. I asked the staff if that was ok and he just shrugged. I'd give my support to any supermarket that banned bikes, scooters, heelies and that had a security guard who could ask children not to run and return them to their parents. I don't need this for my benefit. My DM passed away in March, but it's right and it's a start in this world where some parents just throw their hands up and say "poor me, nothing I can do." Rubbish. At least try. But supermarkets seem too scared of losing business. They need to wake up to the fact that only a minority are these entitled types who couldn't give a stuff about the consequences of their lack of boundaries, and that 95% plus would welcome supermarkets where this just wasn't tolerated. I'm not perfect, far from it. But I try my bloody hardest not to let my DC impact on others. My DD's ADHD has never been an excuse but it makes it harder. But she's capable of learning and trying. People will have empathy if they see you at least trying to stop your DC impacting badly or dangerously on others. If you don't try, yes you'll be judged but what do you expect. It's not much of the week - the rest you can take them to parks, outings, spaces they can run wild. The supermarket should not count as that letting off steam outing.

wilbur do expand- or will this remain annoyingly cryptic?

Stands back nervously and awaits the outrage (from a few)

greatduck let me help you here. Running and screaming are not the only forms of inappropriate and antisocial behaviour by children I used running and screaming because you had 🤷‍♀️

In my old work a kid was using heelies and slipped and hit her head. Then the mum tried to say it was because the floor was wet and she was going to put in a claim. Luckily we had the CCTV and witnesses.

greatduck if your kids are being annoying in public then it is other people's business.

@GreatDuckCookery ah that's where I'd need to disagree with you. As would the folk who gave me a round of applause, after enduring the crew I mentioned for so long. And this is just one example, I call out bad behaviour in supermarkets too. Hope I don't ever bump into you and your kids eh?

'In my old work a kid was using heelies and slipped and hit her head. Then the mum tried to say it was because the floor was wet and she was going to put in a claim. Luckily we had the CCTV and witnesses.'

Oh absolutely

And you find it is these types, yes 'types' who would always say it's someone else's fault etc.