To ask what you’d tell your 30 year old self?

[Gravitatewhere12]

It was my 30th birthday yesterday and today I’m feeling thoroughly depressed for a number of reasons although I know I’ve got everything in the world to look forward to.

I thought it might be interesting to hear what people would say to their 30 year old self if they could. I don’t want to look back with any regrets.

Take the trip get more stamps in your passport than pages in it

Make a budget that includes savings and stick to it - the stuff you’re excited to will be the stuff you’re excited to get rid of after a year.

Spend as much time with the people you love as possible.

Listen to radio 4 every morning to keep up to date!

Your parents will never love you. You will never be good enough. They will end up abusing your dcs (you're not infertile.) Go no contact now.
Also you're high functioning autistic. This is why you feel different. Obsessively read about it!

I would tell myself that 30 is young and you can change your path now!

the internet turns out to be a mistake.

Don't settle for 2nd best.

Look after your skin!

Get into an exercise regime.

Life is shorter than you think. Make it count.

Your family might be a pain in the arse, but you'll miss them when they aren't all here. Spend time with them.

Pay more money into your pension.

Don't let life happen around you. Decide how you want your life to be and work to make it happen.

Stop smoking.

Leave him.

You don't need to be so self conscious about how you look.

Your life at 40 will be hugely different to your life at 30, you have so much to look forward to.

Those mood swings? You get really bad PMT. you just haven't joined the dots yet.

Do something amazing, something you wouldn’t normally do, something you will remember. Mine was a balloon flight.

I have regrets and advice I would give myself if I could at age 30 but my advice to you is to enjoy life. Do something to make yourself feel good even if it’s a small thing.

Work will get tougher & you’ll thrive with the extra responsibility. Put every spare penny from the pay rises, into your pension so you can retire at 55, not 60

LEAVE THE CUNT.

Take everything you are entitled to when you go, because he is going to spend the next ten years backstabbing you anyway.

Save as much money as you can. Don't gain all the weight back.

Use face cream.

Leave your child husband. Who's also violent and will never change. You WILL find real love and a REAL man, who puts you before all others. Forgive yourself; just because your dad said "you made your bed, now lie in it" don't try to prove him wrong.

Enjoy yourself and don’t worry about anything!! Time goes way too quickly and I think I spent too much time worrying. Enjoy being 30 OP you are bloody young, no matter what you may think (that’s what I’d say to me too). Also to people with kids who think their babies have grown up when they are only 2 or 4 or 6 years old. I used to think oh they are so old now. Nope, they are still very young. I’d say to myself back in those times, they are little still, so just enjoy them😍. There is plenty of time for them to be older and leave home. You don’t get that time back.

Mine would be... Make your mum go to the doctors now, go with her if you have to

Also, you will have another baby, hang in there

Save, save, save money

Don’t settle for this job you’re in and enjoy every second of your first child’s baby years

Stop worrying about what people think, it really genuinely doesn’t matter anyway as life will just keep coming at you regardless

I would tell myself to keep exercising and to start saving!

Leave the marriage ASAP, the child who is your everything, will turn on you in adulthood will become an angry alcoholic. In three years time your world will turn upside down, your father will be dead and you will have no job, due to witnessing an event at the family business which was nothing to do with you. But you will be fine.

Don't be so afraid to be on your own. You'll be lonelier married than single
Maintain friendships. They're so important.
Your mental health is nothing to be ashamed of. You'll have one more breakdown before you realise this, but when you do you'll start to get better
Stop playing dumb. You're an intelligent woman - show it
So you're short. Get over it.
You're sister will become your lifeline. Appreciate her for the kind, generous person she is and try and be more like her.
Stop the desperate desire to be liked. Some people won't like you, you won't like some people. That's ok.
You don't need to hide your fondness for Steps. They will become retro and cool again.

When my DH asked me what I wanted for my 30th I said a baby. Little did I know that it would be 7 1/2 years of TTC, miscarriage, failed IVF cycles etc before I finally got and stayed pregnant on IVF cycle three. So I would tell myself that the road ahead will be long and bumpy but it will make us stronger as a couple and the wait will be worth it.

to the many who have had very hard times

I would say -

Forget trying for promotion - it’s not for you and you waste time and energy on it
Be a little less daft with money
Enjoy being skinny for another couple of years but know that life is just the same a stone heavier
Read more

Id say being extravert doesnt mean you are confident. You are not confident because you have no sense of your self and you are a people pleaser. Have therapy, build your self esteem and dont worry about being single. Try and tune out expectation and figure out what might make you happy.

I was well depressed turning 30. Since did bsc and msc. Now getting to 40 and am content. But not sure whether to do numerous things, have health problems.
Advice: dont get married, stay away from him. Stay single.

Dear 30yo me: in the next 12 years you are going to LEARN some shit. It will be painful, it will be upsetting, it will be necessary. You will learn about what matters, and what doesn't.

Oh, and that baby you are cuddling will turn out to be an excellent big brother. You asked the right question when you asked the sonographer "how many are there?" at his 12wk scan - you just asked it 11½ years too early.

30 was shit for me too. Id just been dumped. I felt depressed but also "behind schedule". Who's schedule.
I wish i could go back and chat to myself. Tell her you will end up with job house child pension!! and.... with a higher self esteem. Im single still but i dont feel scared of that now. Looking forward to 50s even though i will likely be single

Plan now, what sort of life you want in your 50's and later, you have enough time to change your life.

Enjoy them. It's an age were you can still enjoy alcohol, after 45 it isn't your friend. If your single, shag lots, sex can change after the Menopause. I had lots of younger FB and don't regret any of them. I'm sorry that I din't go on a few 'party' type holidays.

Don't be convinced that you should be in a relationship.

Wake up to Feminist issues and see most Men for how they really are.

Don't sweat the small stuff, if it won't matter in five years time it doesn't matter now.
Accept that not everyone's the same, everyone doesn't have to be like me.
Not everyone one will like me, the ones who matter are those who do.
Be kind.

Friends matter.

Value the little things
Take out critical illness cover.

Be confident enough to take care of your health - physical and mental
Your career will be your lifeline. Invest in it

Life is short leave the bastard now cause things can (and will) actually get worse and at 30 you were in the position to start all over again.