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AIBU?

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Original poster

Older man on holiday

108 replies

lplo · 20/07/2018 16:27

Currently on holiday in Spain. (All inclusive)

Just venting and wondering if you would be annoyed to.

There's an older man with his family he must be around 80 years old. He likes to sit and stare at people but seems very bitter and concerned with others.

Situation 1- dp asked me at dinner if I would go get him some more potatoes, older man was watching and as I sat back down he turned to his daughter and clicked his fingers to his daughter ( to say oh she's under the thumb), he was sitting beside us just staring so I glared at him. Dp does loads for me so why would I not.

Situation 2- dd aged 3 was running towards the pool so I got up and followed her. Older man moved a chair to sit and watch people playing table tennis and I stood on an empty plastic cup he owned which had been under the chair. I was occupied by reaching my daughter so walked in and when I got her and looked back he passive aggressively picked up his own cup and put it in the bin whilst tutting at me.

He's really pissing me off

OP posts:
user1471517900 · 20/07/2018 16:55

Also if you didn't apologise for crushing his cup (which I agree was an accident) then you were the one being rude there.

Worzil10 · 20/07/2018 16:56

He has nothing better to do carry on about your business and laugh it off. Old git.

ClosdesMouches · 20/07/2018 16:56
Hmm
cardibach · 20/07/2018 16:56

You didn’t stay stormed or glared before. That’s aggressive, not passive aggressive. Which was he?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 20/07/2018 16:56

Effendi - did you read the explanation from the Op as to why she got him the potatoes?

Prestonsflowers · 20/07/2018 16:57

You do sound a bit anxious
Try and relax and enjoy your holiday and ignore him.
Find a table/ seat well away from him.
I couldn’t give a toss if you got potatoes for your DH

MiggledyHiggins · 20/07/2018 16:58

He might just have bitchy resting face OP.

Original poster
lplo · 20/07/2018 16:58

@cardibach I didn't realise I would have to go into that much detail at the start to justify it. I'm not imagining things. He's being annoying.

It was passive aggressive because he was directing his annoyance at me without speaking to me or being confrontational.

OP posts:
ThePlanetGoesOnBeingRound3 · 20/07/2018 16:58

Don't let him get in your head anymore, just smile at him whenever your eyes meet, whatever his expression.
Smile and float above it.
Don't worry about what he's thinking, after all, you don't actually know what he's thinking.
Just smile at him and take away the power.

Quite right he put the cup in the bin, it was his litter.

petrolpump28 · 20/07/2018 16:59

shut is out of your mind and avoid him. Take a book with you.

Original poster
lplo · 20/07/2018 16:59

I will ignore him from now on. He's just being a busy body

OP posts:
NicoAndTheNiners · 20/07/2018 17:00

There’s some grumpy bonkers people around, just be glad you’re not them.

cardibach · 20/07/2018 17:00

Detail would help us to work out whether you are over reacting (perhaps because of your anxiety) or whether he’s being really irritating. I vote the former.

InsomniacAnonymous · 20/07/2018 17:01

I think that, even in a rush, if I'd accidentally stood on someone's cup I would have quickly said, "Oops! Sorry about that" as I chased after my daughter. It's not difficult. He probably thought you were rude.

Original poster
lplo · 20/07/2018 17:01

I don't think it's fair for people to assume that because someone has anxiety they are imaging scenarios.

I know exactly what I saw but all I said was my anxiety is making me paranoid and aware when he's near.

OP posts:
Original poster
lplo · 20/07/2018 17:03

@InsomniacAnonymous I didn't see the cup and was too busy worrying about my child to apologise as I wasn't thinking.

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 20/07/2018 17:03

You don't even know he was annoyed at you. Why would he be annoyed over an empty plastic cup?

Anonymumm · 20/07/2018 17:03

I think you get to that age, you're kind of entitled to behave however you wish - let it go - you're on holiday, go and enjoy it!

5foot5 · 20/07/2018 17:03

With the best will in the world, I think you are making a mountain out of a molehill......

This with bells on. Just ignore - you are probably reading more in to it than is really there anyway.

I think it's nice someone has taken their 80 year old Dad away on holiday.

Original poster
lplo · 20/07/2018 17:03

@Nicknacky because I stood on it and continued running.

OP posts:
NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking · 20/07/2018 17:04

Tbh, if these two very minor incidents are affecting your holiday... I have no idea how you cope day to day.

Some people are arse holes, they’re everywhere 🤷🏻‍♀️

PrivatePike · 20/07/2018 17:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking · 20/07/2018 17:05

@Anonymumm

I think you get to that age, you're kind of entitled to behave however you wish - let it go - you're on holiday, go and enjoy it!

Couldn’t disagree more with this though!

Nicknacky · 20/07/2018 17:05

So how do you know he's annoyed with you? You said yourself you were paying attention to your kid.

NoelHeadbands · 20/07/2018 17:05

I was waiting for the annoying stuff...

If that really is it, I do think you’re making mountains out of molehills. Ignore and enjoy the rest of your holiday

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