Done before but it’s fun. So guess the book and the mil

[Seasawride]

Help! I have one dd. My mil has lived with us since we have been married.

She is a very strong woman and overruled me on everything. She sends me to bed if I sneeze.

When dd was 2 dh pissed off capturing butterflies in Africa and I havnt heard off him for years. Bastard. So mil got friendly with a wierd lady next door. She has big hair coils round her ears, writes books and has lots of kids.

I am concerned she is also involved in modern slavery as she has a woman living with her called Anna who does everything.

Anyway mil and this wierd Jo woman have colluded to send dd to a boarding school.

Aibu to just want to move away with dd. Start again and have some fun?

Guess the book and keep going.

The Jacobite one - I feel I should know it. Long ago I read a Jacobite trilogy by D. K. Broster and can remember nothing at all about it now except the name. Is it that?

Yes, Mr Stark, that was a very easy one. One of my A level set texts.

Yes! It's the Flight of the Heron, the first of the trilogy. Well done guessing it without knowing anything about it at all! It's a fab book.

I'm a promising student at an elite sports academy owned and run by my Mother and Uncle. I hear rumours Mother has moved on from my filmmaker Father's suicide - with a large variety of intriguing men (and classmates, and relatives). I talk to my big brother often by phone, but worry he's up to something v dodgy after he left for college. He may be embroiled with some French Canadian Assassin Terrorists who all use wheelchairs and are killing people using my Father's last movie. My disabled little brother is oblivious and tells me I'm imagining everything.

Starting to worry I have a drug problem, but handily there's a halfway house just down the hill, chock full of weird and wonderful characters who have tried to quit drugs themselves.

Also we don't use numbers to denote years anymore - we have them sponsored by companies. So I'm writing one chapter in the Year of the Whataburger and the next in the Year of the Depend Adult Undergarment, just so you have fun spending hours piecing the order of events together in the hope it all makes sense..)

Just don't watch the film cartridge with a smiley face sticker on it.

Scrambled ‘The Enchanted April’?

Roomba ‘Infinite Jest’?

My husband lacks ambition so I have to push him. He recently got some career advice which pointed out that he has the ability to go all the way if he really makes the effort. Unfortunately, it would require doing something bloody unpleasant. AIBU to tell him to screw his courage to the sticking place and get on with it?

On another matter, I think I may have OCD. Can't seem to get my hands clean whatever I do.

I don't know what Roombas is but it sounds great.

As Miss Lingoss, I'm rather surprised none of my co-workers have appeared on this thread yet. I know they're popular on Mumsnet.

One more from me, then I must do some work

I'm a forensic archaeologist. I was consulted by the police about some bones that were found. Over the course of the investigation, I got to know the investigating officer. Things got very stressful, and we ended up having a ONS. I was quite shocked at myself, because he's happily married, and being the OW is not something I do. I was even more shocked to find I was pregnant. Now I have dd.

He doesn't want to leave his wife, and I don't want him to. But I have to keep seeing him, because he wants to be a good dad to dd (he already has two grown up dds) and our paths keep crossing professionally, and I think I'm falling for him in a big way.

iismum, thanks - I still have the book so must dig it and have another read. I remember I loved it at the time.

Still haven't got Mr Stark's society ball one.

MacBeth!

*MissLingoes' One of Elly Griffiths's crime novels featuring Ruth Galloway?

Right! I've spent the whole morning doing a task that should have taken about an hour because I've been on here so much, and I've just discovered that I have to get to the kid's summer camp early this afternoon because there's a special performance for the parents (sigh) so I'm closing down mumsnet until I get home!

It's been a lot of fun, looking forward to catching up with the thread later ...

I am being unreasonable to think my best friend is a psychopath ?

He talks a lot about inventing his own species and altering genetic code so the worst parts of being human are erased but now he's actually going it.

He invented a sex drug to rival Viagra but I think he has sinister intent.

I am also sleeping with his girlfriend and I think he knows

Dottie, yes.

Gasp, it's the very beginning of the book

From there we embarked on an affair which is fine in our circles as long as you're discreet, which we weren't, so now I've lost custody of DS

I’m seriously worried about my new wife. I’m sure she’s seeing things and I’m not sure what to do.

I thought at first she was clairvoyant. We’d bought a new house and she seemed to instinctively know where a door was that had been blocked up. Then she told me she’d foreseen wallpaper, would you believe!

She got into a real tizz over a play - claimed she’d seen a murder! Well, yes of course she had - it was in the play! But no, not that murder, apparently; another one

She’s not making any sense at all and I’d like her to get psychiatric help, but she prefers to confide in this little old lady who just turned up out of the blue. They know each other from somewhere, she says. I’m beginning to wonder if it’s all a conspiracy.

Aibu to shove the old woman into the sea and pack DW off to the nearest asylum?

I grew up with a life of petty crime. Eventually I got caught and sent to Borstal where they discovered I had an athletic talent. They say I could go far with this but I have one more trick up my sleeve.

Sleeping Murder?

My sister dumps her three kids on me at every possible opportunity, which is a good thing for my own daughter as she seems really confused about whether she's a boy or a girl. I'm not great with keeping them occupied away from my overly invested workaholic husband who does loads of weird experiments in the back room so I ship them and the pet dog off every chance I get in the hope of a bit of peace and quiet.

They seem to have some kind of death wish or are compulsive liars though, because they always nearly end up getting kidnapped or knowing someone who does... they also really seem to hate gypsies and poor children. Little snobs.

Sleeping Murder it is, one of my comfort reads.

Loneliness of a Long Distance Runner?

Yes, Dottie! It’s lovely to know that other people have read it too.

Glamourous 'The Loneliness of the long-distance runner'?

The Loneliness of the Long Distance Runner?

Loneliness of a Long Distance Runner? Yes

Famous Five

Scrambled yes, it's a lovely book isn't it? Also wonderfully cheering.