Jilly Cooper time

[Disabrie22]

It’s that time of year again - when I want to be a character in a Jolly Cooper novel - and only eat orange and steak for a week so I can squeeze into a too tight dress with a stain I’ve artfully covered with a brooch, after I have drenched myself in scent so I can get off with a dangerous drunk mysterious man who is loaded with cash and will whip me away to San Tropez, where I will only have an old bathing dress with moth in the seat which I keep falling out of. There I will meet a loveable old lech covered in Man Tan and flirt wildly while getting tight after too much gin.

It's a quarter past 11 at night where I am, but after reading this I have to get the key for the shed and dig out my Jillies. It's been at least a year since my last read!

Never read but am inspired!

With fabulous timing, Rivals, TMWMHJ, Polo and Appassionata are going to be released next week...

I just spotted this and could not be happier!

@Thisnamechanger

I know! I'm counting the days to hundreds of hours of Jilly Cooper audio!

I finished Riders on audible last month. Adored it.

Now I've got Jump! Which is only just bearable. Are the others def coming out?

I'm off to Stroud now to pick up a nice quiche and have my hair highlighted to look tortoiseshell. Might buy some grey cords or white dungarees too.

@LorelaiVictoriaGilmore

With fabulous timing, Rivals, TMWMHJ, Polo and Appassionata are going to be released next week...

Yay! That's made my day!

yeah i agree Agatha Jump was just about bearable - was that written when Leo was really sick or shortly after he died? Think it was bad times. I found Mount better.

Should we revive the JC Book Club?? Jilly books are the perfect summer read...

I've dug out my Jillies again inspired by this thread. I'm re-listening to Riders on audible & already have next week's releases in my wish list ready for a 'get 3 credits cheap' splurge.

Wonder how much they are on kindle

@Loopytiles I think I paid less than €2 on Kindle.

I am a sexy, curvy and adorably hopeless hippie in bad clothes, wafting Je Reviens, loving the countryside in all her bluebell and wild garlic glory and racketing about my ramshackle cottage with a big dog, singing to Lionel Richie. I'm waiting for my adulterous, masterful polo playing lover to give the hunt the slip and come to ravish me whilst my boobs fall out of my too small bikini and my bum judders adorably as I make scrambled eggs. That will teach his Sloaney bitch of a wife to force me into her maternity clothes. I hope my dependable Laura Ashley-bedecked middle daughter doesn't come home and catch us at it.

Faves- in order: Rivals, MWMHH, Riders, Polo, Appasionata, Score! Score is the last decent one imo. I stop my rereading after that. Pandora-onwards just leave me cold and I haven't forgiven her for killing Billy although Rupe cheating eventually was a bit inevitable.

It's not my favourite but I do find myself coming back to Polo for comfort when my love life hits the skids, so finding out she wrote it whilst being cheated on kind of makes sense.

It's probably been done but pleeeeaaaasssse can we have a Cooper-esque AIBU?

Ooh I love Jilly... such a comforting read!

Just relaxing watching Love Island. I wouldn't normally but Charlene the nanny left it on and my grumpy sexy womanising husband isn't due back from Aachen for 3 more days.

I hope he won't mind that I pranged the Porsche yesterday!

YY to the Prussian blue - and also the palest pink roses.

I am currently getting tight. Am rather hoping that DH will whisk me off to the moth-infested Ikea bed four poster and snore loudly ravish me so that we giggle and gasp with pleasure, much to Mrs Bodkin's disapproval...

I am a committed feminist but bloody hell you'd have to prise my Jilly novels from my cold, dead hands. Bloody love her!

Say what you like about Jilly, she writes beautifully about the English countryside. I think in that reason the she is very underrated.

Having been on a crash diet for 5 days to fit into my younger sister's skintight black sheath dress for tonight's hunt ball, where I was determined to finally declare my love for Piers the rakish head groom who looks devastating in black tie, I overheard my mother arranging to meet him in the Crown and Cushion, a darling dog friendly hostelry that does ice cold Sancerre by the bucket and a delectable ploughmans.

Watching her skulk out when she thought I was in the bath in a cloud of Diorissimo and a fur coat and little else, I devoured the contents of the fridge and took a huge bowl of pavlova with extra double cream to bed with me, along with 40 Marlboro red and my faithful cat Pickle, who manages to maintain his balance heroically on my sobbing shoulders.

Oh and I've also sloshed 4 fingers of whisky into a tooth mug to take with me and drawn a moustache on mother's full nude self portrait hung above the fireplace, a gift from her third husband, the movie director with bad breath and roaming hands.

I'm heartbroken, the man I'm in love with is getting off with a blonde with a lisp and I'm stuck with the big boobed passive aggressive singer.

Blossom, angel - you're absolutely above a groom! Come for kitchen sups next week and I'll wheel out all my gorgeous husband's (with a wandering eye but not wandering hands) single rakish cad friends.

I know he is super chums with a frite-fully hunky American whose father owns an airline. He was hung up on some jumped up bitch of girl who fancies herself as a polo player. He's also friends with some revolting handshakes twins. They bound all over the lawn like a pair of glorious happy otters.

Best - I think, to sound like an utter wanker, that within her genre she’s a bloody towering genius! Who else writes chick lit/bonkbusters that are so well written? And she has an absolutely unique turn of phrase, where you’d know instantly a paragraph was hers. Obviously it’s not great literary fiction, nor would she claim it is, but if you’re looking for that sort of fun book, nobody holds a candle to jilly!

I love Octavia and Imogen. I think I would secretly love a tall, dark, well-built, impossibly handsome bit of rough who had made millions with his own Art and Antiques firm in London. He would whisk me off to the South of France for the summer because he needed a PA on his yacht and I needed a job (having given the last of my nheritance to my beautiful but dissolute brother to get him out of a mess with his gambling debts) where we'd fight like cat and dog but be desperately attracted to each other underneath it all. Then I'd be kidnapped by impassive French gangsters who mistook me for his wife and were furious because of his success buying an undiscovered masterpiece by Monet, and I'd be terribly brave for a week until my hero rescued me having not slept for a second, and put his own lfe at risk, ignoring the warnings of terrible danger from Interpol. I would fall into his arms with my hair needing a good wash and my dress filthy. We'd return to the amazing Queen Anne house he had just bought in the South Downs, get married, have lots of wonderful sex and babies, two dogs, drink champagne and never fight again.
However, should the opportunity arrise at any point, I would have to decide what to do with DH.

Been reading this thread for a few days, and I've just picked up Bella from the library! It's the only one I couldn't remember the plot of.