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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Getting pregnant while using condoms properly...

55 replies

Flatearthersphere · 15/07/2018 16:30

How does this happen?

If you use them properly, so no messing about before the condom is on, condom doesn't visibly split etc, partner removes himself once finished...
how??

I am having a mild freak out as I am a few days late and have been vomiting on and off for a couple of days. But I swear to god we use them as they say in the instructions.

Wouldn't be the end of the world, I am aware they're only 98% effective but I guess I thought that I would know if they had failed and would have warning so that I could get the morning after pill.

I also know AIBU is probably not the best section to post in, but I need people to talk me down out of this freak out, and I would love to get a test but my husband thinks I am being ludicrous and I am too "sicky" to face the outside world today.

OP posts:
dangermouseisace · 15/07/2018 18:19

My GP said that the 98% is on the assumption that they are used 100% correctly, but because people are human and might not realise they’ve done something wrong they are actually only around 70% effective.

onalongsabbatical · 15/07/2018 18:21

So he thinks, basically, that you're overreacting and being a bit silly. If you show him the examples of posters here who have got pregnant in these circs will he then understand your worry and go and buy a test to (hopefully) set your mind at rest?

Paranormalbouquet · 15/07/2018 18:23

I got pregnant using them correctly. 17 weeks now! They were stored in bathroom which can apparently interfere with effectiveness. Was awaiting surgery for investigation of recurrent miscarriages so came as quite the surprise. Nothing is 100% effective.

tor8181 · 15/07/2018 18:25

6 pound a test!!!! ,3 for a pound in poundland and they do work i found out when i was 2 and a half weeks

jfirohi · 15/07/2018 18:31

I think it's very unlikely OP unless there was a hole in the condom.

MimiSunshine · 15/07/2018 18:32

FoxandBear andvyou sound like an aggressive, angry, man hater.
Not true? 🤷‍♀️

It’s sunday evening people where are all these puns shops that are still open near you?

MimiSunshine · 15/07/2018 18:33

😄 at pun shop

POUND shop

NotUmbongoUnchained · 15/07/2018 18:35

My son survived a condom and the morning after pill! 😂

GeekyBlinders · 15/07/2018 18:40

I don’t live anywhere near a poundshop - it would cost me more in petrol, time and parking to go to the nearest one, than it would to get one from Tesco nearby.

OP there could have been a microscopic hole... still, you may as well wait a couple of days, as that won’t affect the outcome!

Pepper123123 · 15/07/2018 18:43

Why are you paying £6 for a test?

I've always used the pack of three for 75p. They're the same quality doctors use and in most cases are just as or more sensitive than the money grabbing expensive brands.

Just pop to the nearest pound shop

FoxAndBear · 15/07/2018 18:49

@MimiSunshine hardly, but my husband wouldn't minimise and laugh off my concerns about something as major as a potential unwanted pregnancy. And even if he thought I was over reacting he would still get me a test when he realised it mattered to me and I was freaking out.
That's hardly the highest standard someone has to meet as a decent husband (or friend etc). Maybe your standards are lower if you think that makes me man hating Hmm

userabcname · 15/07/2018 18:56

Honestly I have heard of stranger things than a condom fail pregnancy. One may have split without you noticing or have had a hole or have expired or something. Definitely do a test. Order them on Amazon and get them delivered tomorrow.

MimiSunshine · 15/07/2018 19:01

Oh FFS FoxandBear wind your neck in. The OP has already said its more of a laugh it off kind of refusal and I think she knows him better than your projection of him.

And my point about you being man hating was to show that a few simple sentences of yours could make me think that about you, when in reality I highly doubt you are just like OPs DH is probably a very caring individual and is just thinking what’s the point in driving round to find an open chemist tonight when the same result will be the case tomorrow morning

DuchyDuke · 15/07/2018 19:01

Condoms are only effective if they fit properly and you know how to put them on properly. That is you have to leave a gap at the tip for the sperm to collect else it will split.

Grilledaubergines · 15/07/2018 19:06

Oh OP, you should have known that by even making a joke about your husband not wanting to waste money, you end up with strangers insulting him. Have you been told to get your ducks in a row and clear the joint account yet?😂

As an aside, 15 years agibwgen I did my last test, the cheapest available was over £10 for a single test.

FuckMyUterus · 15/07/2018 19:14

😂 all these people implying your husband is some kind of psychopathic abusive bunny boiler!
My son was conceived using condoms whilst on Microgynon pill... I'm still not overly sure how it happened to be honest!

Original poster
Flatearthersphere · 15/07/2018 19:25

Oh my god my husband is bloody lovely! I'm not worried! I'm wondering and feeling sorry for myself. I have 3 little ones already how hard can 4 be? Grin I don't like my husband being insulted really, and yes they really are 6 quid here. I live in the middle of nowhere, and all we have is a morrisons which is obviously closed as it's late on a Sunday and a pharmacy which has about 10 items in it. I have no idea where the nearest pound shop is Confused
Anyway, I'm sure my abusive husband will get me a test tomorrow because he will want to see if his hole-poking (in more ways than one) was successful won't he? Grin thank you for the people who replied properly! Some of your experiences are a bit unsettling haha!

OP posts:
Grilledaubergines · 15/07/2018 19:39

Flat hope you feel better soon and good luck, whatever the outcome! With your extravagant overpriced non-Poundland test! I still think £6 is a bargain. £1 each and I’d be doing tests as a hobby!

Original poster
Flatearthersphere · 15/07/2018 19:46

Thank you @grilledaubergines I will update when I know!

OP posts:
NotAnotherHeffalump · 15/07/2018 19:54

Ooh let us know how it goes. I didn't realise you could get pregnant unless there was an obvious split or something either!

Mousefunky · 15/07/2018 19:57

What some men forget to do is hold it properly when withdrawing so some can leak out then. Alternatively if they hang around in there for a while or, dare I say, continue to push in and out (?!) after cumming, it’s possible some could leak. There’s always a possibility with any contraceptive sadly. As for tests, order one on amazon prime.

beautifulblue · 15/07/2018 19:59

.

thenewaveragebear1983 · 15/07/2018 20:33

I thought it was 98% effective over a year? So if 100 couples use condoms completely by the instructions for a year, 2 will get pregnant?

helpmum2003 · 15/07/2018 20:40

The risks with condoms other than obvious splits are:

Pre-ejaculate has sperm in so penis shouldn't be unprotected in/at entrance vagina

Hold condom on when pulling out

Wash hands/penis before going near vagina again after withdrawal

Some oil based lubes/vaginally treatments (eg canesten) can affect condom integrity.

They're not straightforward. ....

Hope it turns out how you want.....

user56 · 15/07/2018 20:42

Hope you get the outcome you're hoping for !!