To change their name!

[Chesternut]

My DD is 4 years old and I gave her a name which, I thought, was very original as I hadn't heard another girl called it in about 20 years. Only to find when she started nursery another girl called the same but spelt differently. DD is due to start full time education in September and there will be 2 other girls with the same name so 3 in the class including DD. Now there's another in other DC's class.
Totally hacked off and really upset by this. Maybe an over reaction but in the 1970's I was one of 5 named the same in my class and vowed never to have my DC's live with the same. Now history is being repeated.
AIBU to change my DD's name before September? I love her name but HATE it's so common now.

I have 2 friends with daughter’s called Esmé. Both spelt the same but one pronounces it Es me & the other Es may.

Utterly ridiculous idea to contemplate changing a 4 year old's name because other children have the same name.

Maybe you should go into school and tell all the other parents that they need to change the name of their DDs because you chose that name and it belongs to you. That would be just as silly.

I was one of five girls out of the eighteen girls in my class in senior school with the same name. It didn't bother me in the least. It was a popular name when I was born and now you never hear it except in women of my generation.

Names come and go in and out of fashion. Are you planning on changing it throughout her life if the particular name you give her then becomes popular?

Yes YABVVU! Once it’s her name, it’s her name, it’s not up to you to change her name just because you don’t fancy her having it anymore. It’s not going to hurt her.

I swear every other child in my kid’s dance school is called Amelie. Bet their parents all thought they were being terribly original aswell!!

A bit annoying but you can’t change her name now. Esme is pretty popular though. My friend has a 21 year old Esme.

I refused to have a name in the top 100 when I named my daughter 21 years ago. It’s in the top ten now.

Sirfredfredgeorge Yep my money was on Pratchett, in all fairness Ms Weatherwax was a wise,wise, woman, who wouldn't want to be named after her....
Ps Chesternut my son's also got a "common" name that's a multiple in the class and I wish it was something else, as it wasn't my choice and people still get his "full name" (always shortened )wrong but as he came with and answers to that name I stuck with it, although the shortened version does suit him I still wish it was a name I chose

Esme is a smashing name. Iam spelling it the way my grandmother spelt her own name. I get what your beef is but drastic...when she leaves school and goes into the workforce and someone else has her name also..will she... or you change it again? My eldest dd octavia is the only one in her school...i wouldnt dream if changing it if another girl had the same name...i would just be from afar secretly congratulating her parents on an excellent name choice.

My dd had a name that was common when she was that age. By the end of primary she was the only one in the school.

I never encountered another person with my name until my late 20s. I now have heard of only 2 other children with my name, and both attend primary with my children.
I would have loved to have have known someone with the same name when I were in school. Hate people telling me how unusual it is, so I don't think knowing few other people with that name in her class will be an issue. My dd has the same thing and has never minded, they just get there surname initial added to there fornames.

You can’t change her name at 4.

I’m baffled as to how people thought esme was unusual, it’s been in the top 100 for a decade now!

names.darkgreener.com/#esme

YABU, she's 4! Don't change her name now. The name we picked for our daughter was rare at the time, it was picked for sentimental reasons for me but now everywhere we go we hear other girls being called it. It happens, names have phases.

This is ridiculous- you cannot seriously be considering this?! She is four years old!! If the worst thing that could happen to her is sharing her name with others at school then you are doing pretty well. Please be mindful to leave your own issues and insecurities in your own past and not dump them on your DD who obviously does not share your feelings on the matter.

She is 4 and her name is her identity, the only one she has ever had. Imagine how confused she will feel starting a new school with a new name/identity to get used to while other girls are using the only name she has ever known. It's not about you, it's not your name, your child us an individual in her own right not a toy to play with.

@Chesternut

In French Esmée is pronounced Ez-May not Ez-Mee.

See, I read it the way you say you pronounce it, and in the UK I’ve only ever heard it pronounced that way!

Never heard it sounding like ‘me’ at the end. So at least many will pronounce it as you intended...

Well it's her name now, does she want to change it?

God you sound a pretentious nutcase.

It’s a beautiful name. Do what if another child has it. If you change it (which I think is totally unreasonable) what will you do when she goes to secondary school, or university and another child has the same name? Change it again?

It’s not YOUR name to change.

I know exactly how you feel. Throughout school I was never called just by my first name by staff or pupils. I was ALWAYS CherriesF. The 4 other little cherries in my class were also called by their first name plus initial of last name. My mum really hated it as she thought she had chosen a traditional but uncommon name. I still can date a woman’s age to about a three year period if she has the same first name as me. Goodness knows why it suddenly became so popular and then faded away never to be heard again. Then I ended up doing exactly the same thing (with a different name)to my DD. I couldn’t believe it when she started nursery and there were 4 other CherriesJuniors, and exactly the same thing happened with First name plus initial of last name. She was rather more assertive at 4 than I was though, and insisted that was NOT her name every time someone said it. She electively and unilaterally decided to use her first and second name together, rather than her first name plus initial of last name. It worked because she chose to do it that way, but I wouldn’t have imposed in on her. When she got to about 10 she dropped the hyphenation and went back to just her first name. I still think her name is pretty, but do wish I’d called her something else.

Not for any pretentious reasons about her needing a unique name, but simply as it was SO common during a 4-5 year period that every class had anything up to 8 in them. One year only one child in her brownie pack had a different name.

My daughters name is never in the top 100 most common names and I have only ever met one other person called (even though it's not THAT uncommon). But if it suddenly became super popular (which I doubt) then I wouldn't dream of changing it.

As if you'd ever do this 😂. Ridiculous! Nothing more to say.

Really upset by this?! A little precious don’t you think? Leave it FFS. I’ve been around plenty of girls through nursery and schools and never met one girl with that name, whatever the spelling. If you’re seriously considering changing your daughters name at the age of 4 then you have to really get your priorities straight. She will curse you when she’s an adult and have to fill out extra details of previous names etc when filling out paperwork like for passports etc. Reason for name change? ‘My mum didn’t want me to have that name anymore because there were other kids at school with the same name...’

At secondary there were 3 of us with the same name (I don't think it's even a particularly popular name), one of which is still my best friend many years later. Started working at a place and met someone else with the same name, again good friends with her.

It really has never bothered me.

Not RTFT but YABU I have a very common name and meet people with the same name all the time, it has never bothered me in the slightest. There are two of us with the same name at my work, still doesn't bother me. My DD on the other hand has a very traditional name and is the only one at both her nursery and school.

There were seven girls in my class with the same name as me it didn't bother me then and it has never affected me through my life. In fact these days I hardly ever hear of anyone with my name even in my age group. Esme is a lovely name and when your daughter goes out into the wider world she won't meets lots of people with her name. What would you even change it to? Something weird that would make her different and unusual? She may not thank you for it . Leave it be.