Smoking during pregnancy

[Geordiegirl1988]

I know it's probably none of my business but my friend smokes between 15-20 a day and is pregnant . Should I say anything or keep my thoughts to myself on this subject ? She says it's her only vice and has gave up drinking so why shud she give up the tabs ? I have resisted giving her my thoughts as I don't know if I should say anything as I don't want to over step the mark . I get it's an emotive topic but I can't help but feel 15-20 cigarettes a day is bad for her unborn baby .

Helping people quit smoking is a big public health priority though. We had loads of seminars and workshops in med school specifically to help us support our patients to stop smoking. Its one of the first questions you ask when taking a history, and then there's a whole bunch of ways you're supposed to try and assess at what stage of being ready to quit the patient is so that you can intervene most effectively. When I quit smoking myself about 10 years ago, I was prescribed around £60 worth of nicorette patches and gum to help me, and there's definitely more funding targetted at it nowadays. It's actually a huge public health priority for the NHS.

As someone who has struggled with infertility, it does make my blood boil to know that I desperately tried to have children but didn't succeed whereas others get pregnant and make the conscious decision to do something that they know will hurt their child. It is child abuse to do something for your own pleasure that you know will hurt your own child. How some people do this I have no idea.

if smoking was that harmful do you not think it would have been made more of a priority? That is your proof right there

You remind me of what JK Rowling wrote about Harry Potter's uncle: he had full trust in the government and establishment.
Just Google WHO's figures for children exposed to passive smoking.
Actuallly sod that. Go read the statistics on how many people die everyday due to smoking then try and think on why we are still selling fags in every supermarket.
How many Americans die in gun violence every year? How many children have died in their schools only? Why has their government not banned the guns yet?

So some posters smoked while pregnant or have loved ones who did. They don’t want to feel like they are Bad People. Therefore smoking is not DEFINITELY a cause of disease. Tada! Mental gymnastics performed!

Ok, I’ll tell you my story. I had 2 kids 18 months apart. Child 1 I smoked throughout. He was 2 weeks overdue. 9lbs. Has been sick about 5 days in all his nearly 30 years. Child 2 I didn’t smoke. Not one. She came 6 weeks early, all through her childhood caught every cough and cold going. Is still quite a small, i was going to say girl but she’s now a woman.

I’m not saying that smoking while pregnant is “good” or “right” of course i’m not. But there are so so many other factors when it comes to birth, weight, childhood etc etc. Smoking is one small part of that. No one, absolutely.no one, can say that your friend will definitely encounter problems because she has smoked. They just can’t.

Yep she's a scumbag OP. Get nicer friends.

Ah, OK. Ignore the masses of medical literature everyone, false alarm. It’s fine to smoke while you’re pregnant because Storm4star did it and her child turned out fine.

@storm4star
Wow! Let’s all poison our unborn babies just like you did. It works out so well doesn’t it?

So, out of interest why did you care more about your second child’s health than your first?

Right, right, it turned out fine for me but that’s just “luck” is it? I could give you many other examples. Like my friend who never smoked and had a still birth and my other friend who smoked through all 3 pregnancies and had healthy kids. But no, it’s just me being lucky. Go back a few decades and a lot more people smoked, a large majority of whom had healthy babies. But no, I was just lucky. Right.

I’m all for “not my circus” but (as an ex smoker) I’m not sure o could stay very good friends with someone who could abuse an unborn baby like this and not even try to stop.

Stay on your high horses people, i’m done with this thread. Shame you can’t put all this energy into the kids that really need help.

Right, right, it turned out fine for me but that’s just “luck” is it?

Yes

Anacdata about "I did this and I was fine" means nothing.
Endless research has proven beyond doubt the damage which can be caused by smoking in pregnancy. It does affect lung and other development. Asthma is not monocausal so the correlation between asthma rates and smoking rates means nothing, but it is strongly linked to asthma in later life. Not guaranteed in every single case. Thalidomide didn't damage every single baby. But would you take the risk? If the effects of smoking manifested as physical deformity, the rates would be almost non-existent, but because you can't see them and they often don't become apparent until later in life you can kid yourself there aren't any.
As for the comments about research funding. I mean, I've seen that argument used that tobacco companies would fund research to try and prove isn't damaging. Why would anyone back the cause that it does? Not enough money in it compared to the Big Tobacco companies.

Thalidomide didn't damage every single baby. But would you take the risk? If the effects of smoking manifested as physical deformity, the rates would be almost non-existent, but because you can't see them and they often don't become apparent until later in life you can kid yourself there aren't any.

Very good points.

Anecdotes are not data. Storm, they looked at 100,000 pregnancies, a million smokers vs non-smokers. For years. Across the globe and made note of the patterns.

Of course it’s not instant death otherwise no one would do it. Maybe baby 1 was type O blood group and baby 2. Was type B or whatever and that’s what made the difference. The point is, we don’t know why some seem to escape without ill effect. Maybe she will feel the impact in middle age, maybe her children will, maybe nothing will happen.

The point is, science has shown that if you smoke, you are AT RISK of a whole host of problems. Why gamble like that?

Oh Ethel, if you put your hand in this box there might be a snake or there might not. What do I gain by doing it? Nothing. Why the fuck would I put my hand in the box. In the same way, why the fuck would I smoke? Especially during pregnancy.

@storm4star

We’ll stay on our high horses as we all chose not to poison our unborn babies. Wish you could join us!

storm4
You can't see genetic mutations. only scientists can. Just as you can't use your eyes to diagnose a cancer patient. Similarly, you won't be able to prove that some medical complication your exposed child or their children face was NOT because of your smoking. So please don't challenge this. What happened has happened but may be you can now stop people around you by being vocal against it all?
As for your second child having problems, the first thing that comes to my mind is this: when a chimd is born premature, their lungs are not strong enough to support their body and their immune system is not functioning properly either. That start can lead to a lot of complications down the line, right into their adulthood.
I will go one step further and say this: there is a chance that your second pregnancy was affected by your earlier smoking habits.

there is a lot to be said for the wine' o'clock habits of our nation too. I wonder how much resistance we will face for that when smoking in pregnancy is defended so strongly by so many people in this age.

OP, next time you see your friend and she says the same thing- oh I shouldn’t etc I’ll cut down etc. Could you say something like You’ll help her cut down? That at least she knows you’re there as a support but you’re not overly critising her as you’re talking about cutting down, not giving up. Or ask what did her midwife say but only when she’s raised the subject.

Bit odd to make smoking throughout one pregnancy better because your second child was poorly when you hadn’t smoked

I loved smoking, absolutely bloody loved it. But I quit as soon as i found out I was pregnant, I seen it as if I can't even bloody give the ciggies up for bump, there's not much hope in the sacrifices that may face me in motherhood when he's here. And have not had a cig since or a drink for that matter and he turns 1 in August. But not everyone is the same, it's just a massive shame people on here are actually trying to say it causes no potential issues to the baby.
I suppose op it depends on how close you are to this friend, as if it was my friend I would have to tell her I don't want to fall out but I need to say my piece and tell her exactly how I felt, the potential damage she was doing, and would not be able to sit and watch her smoking. Then after baby is here she shouldn't smoke around it or hold it whilst in the same clothes she's just had her stinky cig in. Hopefully once the baby is here it may hit home and she may stop.
I could still have a ciggie ever morning but just look at my LO and would never have forgiven myself if anything would happen to him

You speak sense tiger

Disgusting. Hope social services realises how little she cares for her baby and takes it away. I couldn't continue to be friends with such an awful person. All you can do is walk away though.

Of course it might not damage the foetus, as everyone is different. But the thing is, it might and why would you take the risk? In the same way, we protect our children by putting them in car seats. It's true that the likelihood is that you won't have an accident. But no one would suggest that you don't have to put your child in a car seat, are they?

Your friend is disgusting - there is nothing more low that seeing a pregnant woman fagging it - so I put your friend in this category - the lowest of the low. I imagine it would also be highly embarrassing going to the midwife stinking of fags and having a nigh carbon monoxide level at testing. Smoking effects growth, every cigarette smoked starves the baby of food for 2 hours and oxygen of 20 minutes, and I could go on and on.
She obviously doesn't care that much about the baby. You reap what you sow - if anything happens to the baby or if it was born with any defects then she would get her guilt then, but of course it's too late then.
If she is that desperate then suggest the e cigarette with very low nicotine, then go down to no nicotine - I don't know the ins & outs of e cigarettes, but it has to be better than what she is doing now at least.

Yes she knows how bad it is blah blah but I would still say something.