Wedding day....England are playing?????

[arghhhhhhh]

Just been on fb and someone I know (though not well and I am nit invited to the wedding!) is getting married on Saturday. Obviously England are playing.

She has it a status on saying she has had multiple requests from guests wanting to know if the football will be shown.

Her status basically says she's angry at the messages she's had and under no circumstances will the football be shown. It's her wedding and the day is about that and that only. She's asked that no one checks their phones during the match and is even going to have a sign made for when people enter the venue as a reminder it's a football free zone.

Now she's had a fair few comments - a couple even say they wouldn't attend if they were invited due to her attitude.

What's everyone's opinions?

Me personally, I'd show it! I love football though, I've followed the World Cup through out and I'd be gutted if I couldn't watch it! I'd be making arrangements with the venue to make sure it's on.

The atmosphere would be amazing. I'd be jumping around with everyone else in my dress.....

Also a great way to break up the day. The day goes so fast for the bride and groom but the day guests....it can be such a long and tiring day. What a great way to break up the day!

Also, we are doing well, we haven't been in this situation where we may actually have a good chance of WINNING!!!! for years and probably never will again. The whole country is routing for them. Even people who don't like football are into it. I just don't think it's fair to expect people not to watch it, or not even check their phones!

Saying that....I do understand this lady's frustrations. She's been planning this wedding for over a year. I got married quite recently and know the stress etc of planning....but yeah, wouldn't make any difference to me. I'd be so excited for it to be shown!

Opinions? Is she being unreasonable? It's her and her partners day at the end of it.....I'd be worried my guests wouldn't show up though....

Oh, we are doing Pride this Saturday. Oh dear. I can see that all getting a bit unpleasant.

I agree with honeyroar there has to be balance - I would not expect to have to find a means of watching the match but I also would not stop people checking

But in fairness the draw was done on 1 December 2017 I suspect her wedding was long booked by then and the chances of the quarter final England being in would be the one at 3pm is longer than 1 in 3

It’s our wedding anniversary on Saturday and if our wedding day had fallen on the same day as the World Cup I would have had it shown at our reception but I do love football so.....

If the bride or groom dislikes it then that's fine. But you have to respect the feelings of some guests. It's going to be a massive deal for them

What about
You have to respect the bride and the groom and the fact they dislike football
The wedding is a massive deal for them. It’s a once in a lifetime event compare to the World Cup that happens once every 4 years.

You see the respect goes both ways....
Yu can’t ask the bride and groom to put up with something they hate in their wedding day on te grounds they shouod be more accommodating to this very special event.
The wedding IS a very special event for them too. The guests can also be asked to be more accommodating!!

Re the no phone. I suspect she is now expecting her guests to be with their nose I their phone, not takmingto anyone, not ‘being there’ atvt wedding because they are either watching the football in their phone or thinking about it.
If it was any other subject, everyone would be horrified and the guests would be told they are CF.

I'd show it. Shes fighting a losing battle else. Let people enjoy themselves.

The same day as England made the quarter finals in the World Cup that should say.

Football or not, she can't dictate in this way to her guests although many brides think it's OK .

Im assuming there is going to be a bar at the wedding reception so I don’t think the bride will be treated to very nice drunken comments.

Scribblegirl I didn't. I don't think I've got any friends that would be rude enough to expect me to make a wedding all about a football match though. Like I said, if you get an invitation you decide whether you've got something else important on that day before you accept..

I'd just show the match, knowing that otherwise, despite the planned signs and commands not to, a significant proportion of the guests will be watching it/ listening to it/ checking for updates on the phones throughout anyway. You don't have to like football or agree that the world cup is of any importance to understand that England playing in a World Cup quarter final against opponents who we actually have some chance of beating is going to be seen as a Big Deal by an awful lot of people!

I do feel sorry for her, but I do think it would be better for everyone if she could just embrace it.

Fair enough if its the time of the ceremony and it is impossible to change it, but for most weddings 3-5 is the dead time anyway, when the B&G are being photographed and if you're lucky you get to drink fizz and eat canapes and if you're unlucky you get a cup of tea and a bit of shortbread. Far better to get a screen up show the match and just contain it to one room and get everyone's full attention once it's done.

It's just plan churlish to tell people they can't even check on the results, and she'll probably get people calling off as a result.

We went to a wedding on the day of an England World Cup match - most men disappeared for 2 hours at a point. It's a big event, if you get married end of June - July on a world cup year you take the risk.

Talk about your bad luck, any other WC and you’d have bet that England would have bombed in the Group or not even qualified.

Not really.

England qualify for most international tournaments and usually reach the knock out stages once there then lose. Since being internationally unbanned, there have been 15 major tournaments. England have been in 12 of them and reached the knock out stages in 10. Whenever the world cup is on, and I realise not everyone would know this in advance, there is a realistic chance of an England knock out game happening.

As someone with no interest whatsoever in football, I can see her point of view. I wouldn't show the match, and I would be disappointed that people would rate a match over my wedding. It is not even the final.

That said, I think she is silly saying people can't check their phones. There is no way she can ensure they don't, and I would have thought it was the ideal compromise to those who love football. A few people sneakily checking their phones wouldn't spoil the day for the bride, surely?

And just how many other events would people feel entitled to disrupt because of sport (particularly men's sports) being on television. A funeral? An awards ceremony? Your kids' school play? A major birthday party (for someone who is not interested in sport)?

These are all quite unlike weddings in that your RSVP doesn't result in significant expense being incurred by the holder, that is they don't book you a meal. So with that in mind, there would likely be more icant last minute non-attendance from the people most interested in watching the game, in a way that there isn't if someone has paid £50 for your dinner. But for those attending, I'd certainly expect some of them to follow the game on their phones, by text, whilst nipping to the loo or for a cigarette etc, and would advise anyone involved in hosting such an event that they're on a hiding to absolutely fuck all telling people it's a world cup free zone.

Also, those of you who keep telling us how much you don't like football, nobody is impressed. Inability to understand things that are important to other people but that you don't like isn't a positive trait.

We got married in 2014 when the World Cup was on we had booked 3 years in advance however dh was clued up when the fixtures would likely be and we married in August after the World Cup and before the football season started again. We had attended a wedding prior with a championship league on and lots of guest left to watch the match.

I'm not a football fan at all but even so, if this was my wedding I'd work around it somehow or arrange for it to be on in a side room. Not doing so will result in people staying away, going off to a nearby pub or hiding on the toilet somewhere with their phones for large periods of time.She'll end up feeling like the World Cup spoilt her wedding which would be sad.

I have no interest in football. Don't even have a t.v. so no idea what's been going on at all? No idea. I wouldn't show the football but you cant really ban adults looking at phones lol.

Priest: Does anyone know of any just cause why these two should not be wed?
Congregation: Yaayyyyyyyyyyy

Priest: I know pronounce you man and wife:
Congregation: Nooooooooooo!!!!

I think it depends on the guests really - if it was a tiny wedding for close friends and family only then I'd be devastated if they sloped off to watch partway through, but as someone else said, most weddings include random great aunts and coworkers' partners and those sorts of people. In which case i definitely wouldn't expect them to care more about some stranger's wedding than the match!

Also for people talking about guests who aren't interested being forced to watch it, I don't think anyone's suggesting the bride tie them all to chairs in front of a cinema screen! She could have a screen at one end of the reception hall or a small side room with a TV or whatever the venue allows.

I don't know @ReanimatedSGB, I know a fair few who are doing both Pride and the football !

I'm not a huge football fan by any means, but we all watched and really enjoyed the match last night. It's every 4 years and to be honest, anyone who books a wedding or event during the world cup is taking a chance that there could be a match on..... and it was advertised long enough ago. If it were me, I'd embrace it, get a screen sorted and let everyone enjoy it together rather than people sneaking off to watch in their rooms/in the bar. She sounds a very precious bride tbh................

We lost a number of football watching guests for a couple of hours at a wedding I attended. There were enough not watching for it to still be special, and the others had a whale of a time cheering on England en masse rather than at home, on a small screen.That wedding was memorable.

She needs to accept the inevitable.

if she does show it, she better put it on mute

Good luck with that; even in the unlikely event the footie fans don't turn it up again there'd still be the braying and cussing to cope with - which is why I'd personally have it well away from the main crowd

And why the assumption that lots will want to watch anyway? Despite the hype the Columbia match was seen by less than half the population and plenty of those will have only seen it because "it was on and looked fun so I gave it a whirl"

Not everybody's into football or even believes it matters, but as I said it's a question of knowing your guests

I have zero interest in football but I sat with DH last night and watched the penalty shoot out. He's English - we live in Scotland - and I can see that this matters to him. Not in a life or death sort of way, but it's important to him, if we were invited to a wedding on Saturday, unless it was a very close relative, I could see him not going if he was not allowed to watch the match, however childish that makes him sound.

B2B has two ways to go about this - the high way or the gracious way. I accept it's hard when she will have spent a lot of time planning for the day - I'm not sure that I would have gone the zen route at the point I was getting married - but trying to pretend its not happening is very short sighted and will lead to hard feelings all round.

She'll have to confiscate everyone's phones to stop them looking!