To think its totally fine to do this in your own garden?

[InTheLightOfTheMoon]

Would you have a problem with a neighbour sunbathing topless or in a thong bikini in their garden?

This was a huge issue with my SIL and family.

Apparently SIL started sunbathing in her back garden and attracted the attention of male neighbour who would shout innuendos over the fence. Her teenage daughter asked her to stop, was embarrassed by it, but she didn’t. We know this because teenage daughter posted about it on FB!

Long story short, her H asked her to stop as the neighbour was becoming a problem shouting out to teenage daughter etc as well as SIL. SIL wouldn’t stop. It caused huge rows.

SIL and BIL are now divorced (more to it but it was this type of thing that broke the marriage) DN doesn’t see much of her mother who regularly posts adult shots on the social network sites. She’s nearly 50.

I really don't understand what is offensive about boobs? Or why anyone's kids would be traumatised by seeing them?

I really don't understand what is offensive about boobs? Or why anyone's kids would be traumatised by seeing them?

Boobs are just sacks of flesh for feeding babies. Nothing wrong with them- it's just a prudish thing to say that the sacks of skin are fine but the areola is private. Honestly it's ridiculous- if an overweight flabby man can walk about with his nipples out so can a woman. Nipples are not sex objects, they are made to have babies suckle on.

Actually I've just thought about this a bit more and the body shame women face just for having a body is disgusting. A man would not get this kind of criticism. What archaic attitudes this country has!

So it's alright for men to swan about with no tops on in this heat but a woman shouldn't sunbathe topless in her own garden? What a load of bollocks.

Yanbu.

If you catch a glance and are offended I think you need to ask yourself why.

When did the UK get so bloody uptight and worried about what other peopke think?!
Totally agree. I'm old, so my parents were of the war generation and some of the comments on here remind me of what they would say. So repressed. I thought we'd moved on from that.

I don't flaunt anything hoping anyone will be looking, I just take my top off in the privacy of my garden and as a PP said, I have my top close to hand should I need to pop it on quickly. I never have though and no one can see me

Some people really need to lighten up or you will be passing on this 'oooh errr matron, showing flesh is disgusting' attitude onto children with all the problems that can bring. The human form can be beautiful, I've just got back from being on the beach and there were some gorgeous young things in thongs and sometimes topless. I loved how they look. There were a few older women topless too (I hate a wet bikini top so although I keep it on to lie out, I take it off at the waters edge to swim, it's very freeing swimming in beauttiful clear water with everything free!). No one was looking disgusted and if they were, that's their peculiar problem to have. Embrace your body! I'm probably older than anyone on here (sixties) and I am so surprised this attitude is out there in this day and age.

As for why, my tits aren't that much different in colour to the rest of me, quite brown, and I like it

I don't understand how it's any different than sunbathing topless at the beach which people find it acceptable.

I'm also surprised that "your friend" wants to sunbathe as we are all aware of the risks these days. I like laying in the sun with a book but under a massive umbrella in the shade.

If there’s a possibility that her neighbours can see I wouldn’t, out of respect for her neighbours. Yeah I get that it’s your body and there’s nothing wrong with tits and you can do what you want but if there’s a possibility it might offend or embarrass someone who doesn’t share that view it’s best to go with what’s socially acceptable out of mutual respect. If her neighbour glanced out of their window and she caught them looking, it’s going to be awkward and embarrassing. That’s the point when it’s suddenly not ‘tits, we’ve all got them’ but ‘omg #metoo why can’t people keep their filthy impulses to themselves??’.

Would you ask the same or would the reactions be the same if it was a bloke walking around topless in his garden? Nope. So why should it be different for a female? It's just breast tissue - women just have more of it. I would do it. I quite often have had to run in the garden with just my pants on to grab a bra off the line - if someone looked out the window into my garden and saw me, well, that's their issue for looking into my space.

Her garden to walk around naked in if she wants to but I'd worry about photos or video by a pervy neighbour from an upstairs window.

My NDN was topless sunbathing yesterday. First I knew about it was seeing my husband leaning over the fence talking to her!

I sunbathe topless in my garden occasionally, there's only 2 bedroom windows overlooking my garden from the neighbour next door. No children/teens live there, I if there was I probably wouldn't do it.
Oh and I'm a mum to 2 they know I sunbathe topless, I want them to grow up body confident and not feel they have to hide and cover up

Wouldn’t bother me in the slightest - in fact, my neighbours are frequently completely naked, I was surprised the first time, but it barely registers these days.

I walk around naked in my own home and people probably can see in if they put some effort into it, but they’ll only do it once - if they’ve any sense 😂

I can’t see why people get so worked up about it, they’re bodies...we all have one. Some are ‘nicer’ than others, but they’re not that different really.

I wouldn’t mind! I just wish my body was good enough to do the same!

Of course your body is good enough purple it's sunbathing on your own garden not a beauty pageant.

Personally when out in public I don’t want to see topless men either (beaches, pools etc notable exceptions).

In your own garden it’s different, but I would still be very conscious that, if you live in terraced housing or have close neighbours who can see in, that they might find it inconsiderate, or that someone would take pictures which would be all over the internet before the day’s out.

I’ve sunbathed topless on beaches in Europe, so I’m not against it, but it’s definitely not going to kill your friend if she can’t do it. She’ll need to weigh up her neighbours and decide if this is the hill she really wants to die on if they’re the type to complain.

I'm socially conditioned to get a bit embarrassed at women's breasts / nipples and mens penis' on display bit tbh if I have to go upstairs to look out a window to stare I'm a bit over invested. And it's not my body so good luck to them!

I would do it & can’t see any issue with anyone else doing it.

Why are other people staring into each other’s gardens & bothered by what they’re doing? Unless it’s full on sex & kids can see, couldn’t give less of a fuck.

I sunbathe topless in my garden, my garden, my boobs, my choice. I don't look over the fence into my neighbour's garden, I've chosen the most private bit, I play the radio while I'm there. I think my neighbours came and looked what the noise was the first time and now know that radio means naked person. My 25 year old daughter has started doing the same and so if she's now confident enough to get her body out to worship the sun then that's what matters and any neighbours who would prefer for women to be wrapped up pretending we don't have boobs which like to feel the sun can carry on twitching their curtains and feeling disgusted.

the same women who do this are the ones who scream like banshees when having sex

This has to be my favourite part of this whole thread.
Apparently if you don't want tan lines, you also scream while having sex. I can see how the two things are related...

FWIW, I have and will sunbath topless if I am wearing a formal dress which had a different type of neckline. EG when I was bridesmaid, my dress had a low neck line and no back so I sunbathed topless in the weeks building up.

I couldn't care less if you can see me from your window, again I'm not changing my behaviour because a man can't cope with seeing my boobs.

Depends on how visible they are. If they are only overlooked by people in upstairs rooms then I think it’s ok (people tend to just use upstairs for sleeping and not spending large chunks of day looking out of window). If it’s overlooked from ground floor level then I think it is unreasonable

Personally I think there's nothing wrong with it. However my father was a peeping tom and he was always spying on neighbours or places he worked where there were people who did this (obviously they didn't realise) and that is gross. Thank god that was before mobile phones of he'd of taken photos I'm sure. So I think people just need to be careful about if they can be seen and buy whom.

Wouldn’t bother me.

I often wander around in knickers and a vest. Wouldn’t open the front door like that but back gardens are private. Anyone watching through windows or peering over fences is the problem, of a person enjoying the sun.

*not a person enjoying the sun.