Photo of nude baby

[Sailinghappy]

Genuinely interested to see if I'm being unreasonable here... what do you think?

So today my husband was playing with our baby daughter in the paddling pool having the loveliest time. She just splashes around in there nude in this heat and loves it! He took a funny photo of her playing with her duckie in the water and shared it on our family whatsapp group - with both aunties and uncles. I do think the photo is cute and I'm glad they had a lovely time playing but I'm fuming because my baby is nude in this photo and she has her legs wide open!! He way she's sitting isn't very dignified and I don't want everyone having photos of that!!!

Husband thinks it's just a funny photo shared with family - AIBU??

ikeepaforkinmypurse
What????
You make no sense.

Fgs it's like talking to a brick wall!

There's a lot of hysterical pearl clutching won't somebody think of the children on here this evening.

It was an innocent picture sent to family members by her Father ffs!

It was an innocent picture sent to family members by her Father ffs!

indeed!

I am also ignoring the personal attacks from a very unpleasant and disturbed poster

I think that means me!
😁👋 (🤪)

I see nothing wrong with sharing a photo of my baby on a private message to family, and see nothing right in sexualizing a baby's body. It's disgusting. If you agree with them, there's something very wrong with you.

It's not those on here who are doing the sexualising. Those on here who are anti, are merely acknowledging that there are people out there who will sexualise these things. Surely that's obvious? And even if it was only in a private WhatsApp group, potentially I think you have to assume that anything that gets out into the ether could potentially be seen by people outside the elected audience. Hackers are very clever.

There are none so blind as those who will not see.

Posters alerting others to the very real dangers in sharing naked photographs are NOT sexualising children. We are not disturbed FFS. And at the other end of the scale nor are we "pearl-clutching"

The OP was misleading - but the information shared on this thread is still relevant.

At any rate, OP, she's your little girl and if you're not comfortable with something, you should stick to your guns.

bringincrazyback
anything that you have on your computer and phone can be hacked easily, even more so than a whatsapp message. It's slightly different to put a photo on a public social media account or send it to family privately. It might get hacked, true, but your house could be burglared too.

Some of the posts on here trying to go into graphic details are completely out of order

What graphic detail?
Are you actually objecting to posts trying to clarify whether or not a photograph might be indecent?

You used the analogy that your house could be burgled just like an account could be hacked.
But sharing a photo just once is like handing out a key to your front door which could be copied and passed on again and again.
You have absolutely no guarantee that a photo will stay in your family group. By sending it once you have made it public property whether you intended to or not.

At any rate, OP, she's your little girl and if you're not comfortable with something, you should stick to your guns.

She is equally her Fathers little girl. By all means discuss your feelings, but he has an equal say in her upbringing.

by making an issue of this we are putting that badness on it.it shouldn't be a problem.

@ikeepaforkinmypurse

The OP said
I'm fuming because my baby is nude in this photo and she has her legs wide open!!
This isn’t nothing of the sort… What do you normally see when a female is naked legs akimbo?

As I’ve already said:
Many of the images shared by paedophiles on dark web software are images just like this. Taken innocently by loving parents.

Suppose
1)A relative the image is shared with is a paedophile and shares the image on dark web.
2)A relative innocently posts it to their facebook and a paedophile sees and shares it.
3)The phone is stolen or sold and ends up in the hands of a paedophile who sees and shares it.
4)The phone breaks and the guy in the shop fixing it is a paedophile who sees and shares it.

Or the guy in the shop sees it and reports you:
www.newshub.co.nz/home/world/2018/01/us-couple-s-kids-taken-away-after-innocent-bath-photos-reported.html

My DF works for social services and has drilled it into me not to take this kind of picture. Once a photo exists, we can’t be certain that we can control what happens with it. Best to just not take the image. How would you feel if it ended up on one of these websites? If you had, however inadvertently, put your child in that position?

And once again @Nopointinnamechanging2018 said it best:
It really makes me angry when someone who is voicing their concerns about children being sexually abused and stating their opinion on how to protect children from that gets accused of sexualising children.
No, my aim is to keep my kids safe from people that actually do sexualise children so please don't put me in the same category as those who I detest.

See I can repeat myself too! I won’t being engaging with you anymore because you’re clearly not taking this in. And frankly, I think though dost protest too much.

*thou

For years we have been adverse to talking openly and honestly about things that are distasteful. But not talking about the reality of these things leaves children vunerable to abuse and exploitation.
People who abuse children or view and distribute indecent images/child pornography aren't likely to shout about it are they?
It's dangerous to assume that just because someone is a member of your family then they can't be a threat to your children. And to say that if you think that members of your family could abuse or exploit your children then your sick is just naive. These things are almost always close to home.
All that those of us who are apparently "disturbed" or "sick" or "sexualising children" are trying to say is to BE CAREFUL and never rule anyone out as a possible danger to your children because you never can truly know.

Apparently I liked gardening naked in those days (well naked apart from welly boots)

There is this exact picture of me! Watering can, welly boots and (inexplicably) a pink elasticated bow tie.

LeighaJ
My MIL tried to take some of those sleepy newborn type photos of our daughter and didn't do well with it. She told us she made sure she covered up our daughter's vagina in all the pics. Then sent me like 20 pics and 75% of them showed her vagina
Really? I think you need to check your biology

HoneyBadgerApparently

This isn’t nothing of the sort… What do you normally see when a female is naked legs akimbo?
we are all clear on that, what I am questioning are the many posts who need to go into further details? How are they necessary exactly?

You don't share pics of your kids, I share pics of mine with my family, we will never agree. What I have a problem with are the weirdos above who are clearly enjoying making things up and twisting things around.

No one is accusing anyone to sexualise their children just because they keep their photos private. It's the insane comments that are disturbing.

On that fact we probably agree, that there are pedophiles everywhere, and this is a public forum so anyone can read everything on it.

“clearly enjoying“

Is that what they call projection?

Oh, I remember times when people took pictures like this of their children, than went to a shop, got them developed and then happily let these be passed around during family gatherings enjoying all the "Awwwww" s. No issue there at all. Family WhatsApp is just a modern version of it imho.

Family WhatsApp is just a modern version of it imho.

Except it isn’t. If you had sent copies home with every family member after the gathering, then you’re getting closer to a comparison.

YANBU

I would be uncomfortable with the sharing of the digital photo. Once its out there, it's out there and there is no control of the sharing of the image.

Genuine question here.

Some people fear that someone who harbours sexual thoughts about children will see an image of a naked baby female in a paddling pool and be aroused.

But what bad things are likely to happen?

Obviously it is distressing to think that the widespread sharing of a family photo of a baby might trigger sexual excitement. But surely the baby will remain unaware, untouched and unharmed?

Or do people think that there's a risk that the sharing of a family photo will lead directly to somebody trying to befriend the family and get to know the baby and - disarming all the normal protectiveness of parents - manage to get time alone with the baby?

I also think it is impossible to stop people having sexual thoughts about children. (It might be that just glancing at clothed children playing in a park would trigger desire in somebody who was that way inclined. But we don't keep our children veiled and hidden away. Quite the reverse, we disapprove of those who veil and seclude children.)