To think the lift is for anyone who needs it

[EeyoresEars]

Queuing up to use the lift at a busy station this week. There were about 6-8 people in front of me and I’m not sure how many behind. I waited for lift as I’m pregnant and couldn’t have carried my buggy down the long flight of stairs.

A woman who was using a wheelchair was a couple of people behind me in the queue and I heard her starting to complain, not directed at anyone, just talking loudly so everyone could hear. She kept saying she was going to miss her train because of all the lazy people who should carry their cases down the stairs instead of using the lift.

Then she started complaining about people not carrying buggies down the stairs. I kept ignoring her, as did everyone else, which I think made her more angry. She shouted to a staff member and asked what she was going to do about the lazy people in the queue. The staff member said there isn’t priority access for the lift and it’s safest for people not to carry heavy luggage on stairs if they don’t feel able to. The woman using the wheelchair kept on complaining and saying she was taking it further.

Aibu to think anyone who needs the lift can use it and if you have to queue then that’s just life?

She has to book and organise access for her train. If she missed her train, she would have been left quite literally stranded.

I don’t believe she had booked assistance as there were no station staff with her and she appeared to have a friend or relative providing her with help. The train has step free access so there wouldn’t have been a ramp required.

Had she missed the train she would have waited 15 minutes for the next one, so hopefully not stranded for too long.

Yanbu

Since injuring myself badly 6 months ago (waiting for second surgery) I really struggle to go downstairs so will use a lift if there is one. Looking at me you wouldn't think there was anything wrong with me so might wonder why I was waiting for a lift.
Not everyone with difficulties wears a sign saying so. I'd be upset if anyone said I was lazy for needing the lift.

What Sirzy said.
On one occasion so many people pushed in front of me when I was trying to wheel DS I to a lift so he could get to the loo he soiled himself. But on that occasion there wasn't a queue, I was right by the doors but people just kept shoving past. Three lifts came and went - I'm not joking.

I'm now a wheelchair user myself and find the lack of available lifts extremely frustrating. It's taken me an hour to get to the car park in a shopping centre as there was only one lift before.

I think it's the fact that for me there is absolutely no other option. I can't bump my chair up or down stairs like I used to with the kids' buggies. And it's all the time, Day in day out.

Ywnbu

But in that scenario whoever was successful getting into the lift should say to the train dispatcher on the platform - "there were at least 3 people up on the bridge who couldn't fit in the lift just now all desperate to catch this train". You could even stand in the train doorway for the 60 seconds needed for the lift to make a 2nd journey.

But yes she was certainly rude and unreasonable.

I offered to let a man in a wheelchair ahead of my buggy a few years ago and he screamed abuse at me for the whole time it took the lift to arrive. So never again, sorry.

I agree with @AuntieStella - if you are running late and need to jump to the front of the queue to avoid missing your trains you should ask nicely. People seem to forget that manners cost nothing and can get you a long way a lot of the time.

So no, YANBU at all.

You shouldn't be carrying a pushchair on stairs whilst pregnant! Imagine if you slipped and fell!

I would have had to say something!

If she's able to leave the house on her own in her wheelchair and is not relying on anyone else then she should have left earlier like anyone else to make sure she didn't miss her train!

The woman was completely unreasonable.

Ever time at a major train station in London the escalators aren't working I've seen a person, normally elderly, with a large suitcase being attended to due to falling down the stairs. On some occasions there has been blood everywhere.

Just because you are in a wheelchair you cannot presume other people don't have mobility issues or hidden disabilities.

Oh and buggy pushers have to frequently rely on other passengers to help them get the buggy of the train and up/down stairs, and that's if they aren't pregnant.

She was being completely unreasonable and sounds entitled. As far as I know there is no priority with who can use the lift, you had every right to be in that queue and keep your place in the queue.
.

Exactly bishops

And at shopping centres and similar the other issue is when whole parties use the lift at busy times rather than splitting and meeting at the bottom!

I see your rude and entitled and raise you this.

On an average day I encounter many things that are thoughtless and make my life unnecessarily more difficult.

Cars parking on the pavement so I can't get past. If no dropped kerb sometimes I have to go all the way back along the pavement then go up the road. Dangerous and unnecessary.

Shop aisles placed too close together so I can't get through.

Someone parked in a disabled bay 'just for a few minutes' to use a cash point or collect a pizza. No other bays available.

When I go to pay in a shop the card machine has been glued to the mount as "it keeps falling off" so I can't use it.

Disabled loos being used for cleaning storage so I can't get my chair in. Nice, that. I'll just wet myself then. Ditto at my local Wetherspoons where someone decided leaving a knife by the disabled loo which anyone can use to operate the RADAR lock so I have to queue for ages so some piss heads done have to go to the loos upstairs.

They're a few things off the top of my head. There's plenty more. So after encountering this stuff all day every day I'm not exactly sweetness and light.

No YANBU. The lift is for all those that need it including people with heavy luggage, pregnant and wheelchair users.

Everyone was aiming for the same train and everyone ran the risk of being late in that queue.

I think the whole queue bar you was a bit rude for not giving her priority. Wheelchair users have to use lifts all the time. why didn't you tell her she was rude? I would of turned round and told her she was being unreasonable pointed out i was pregnant with a buggy.

She was very rude and entitled. You had just as much right to use tge lift as her. Your safety and tgat of yiur unborn baby comes first. She shoukd leave earlier next time.

yay another wheelchair user bashing thread..... what joy

@FierceDragonMother if the platforms are like at most of the stations I get trains from with massive gaps, then she would need assistance to get on and off the train. While I've seen other passengers helping wheelchair users on and off trains by carrying them and the chair separately when assistance isn't available it is dangerous.

In short train stations in the UK aren't built for anyone who has mobility problems, heavy luggage or buggies.

My point was that there were people in that queue that could have used the stairs. It may have taken them longer than normal to use the stairs because they were carrying stuff or whatever. But they COULD use the stairs. A wheelchair user simply doesn’t have that option.

She's rude.

And Samcro I totally agree. The lack of care and compassion we get on a daily basis is often crushing.

Kaytee
I do understand. After 10 years of chronic pain and predominantly back pain I recently got a disabled badge. I didn’t want one but I was just too ill. Turns out I have a lot of gynaecological issues, my uterus was poisoning me and I have just had a hysterectomy and lots of cleaning for adhesions etc.

Of course you’re not lazy. And of course not all disabilities are visible. Some stupid disabled woman on crutches nearly rammed into me a couple of weeks ago because I didn’t move out of her way (wasn’t able). She is far more mobile than me and in better health. Assumptions hurt.

Eeyore
Spd is painful. But you’re only pregnant. Not disabled. There is a world of difference between disability and a painful pregnancy. Carpal tunnel syndrome is in your hand doesn’t apply in this instance. Your attitude shows you really don’t have the first clue about what it is to be disabled.

I think people like this woman in the wheelchair have to accept that lifts are not always prioritised for disabled people. And also some disabilities aren't obvious. You might see someone without a suitcase queuing for a lift. Maybe they have MS and are really tired and struggling that day. It's one of those things where you should take a deep breath if it bothers you and assume people are queuing because they need to use it, not because they're selfish/ lazy/ etc.

What so you think pregnant op should be carrying a buggy down the stairs then. It is not a wheelchair bashing thread, the woman was rude. Everyone can be rude whatever!

I think you (and the other people there) should have let her go first. One day, you won't be pregnant and the SPD will go. She may well be in a wheelchair for the rest of her days. However, I'm not sure I'd want to be quite so considerate to someone who was rude to me.

Transport is a complete nightmare for people who need extra help. They book the help and it doesn't materialise. Also if there are delays what do they do, they can't just run from one platform to another when they change them.

Yesterday evening I was leaving London and a guy in a wheelchair was waiting on the platform, the train before mine had been cancelled and there was nobody to help him onto the train. He got aggressive too, but I can understand it - he said the train wasn't leaving without him on it. Fortunately the platform staff got the ramp and then let hi on. But he shouldn't have had to have got like that.

When he got off the guard made a huge song and dance about the delay while he got the ramp and apologised to the train for the delay caused because he was helping the guy off the train. Why the hell should you be apologising for doing your job to help someone with a disability? It was only a few minutes and if he'd been prepared, would have been even less than that.