to not contribute to this appeal and potentially embarrass my children?

[SnappedCrackledAndPopped]

School is holding a cake sale and non uniform day for a 'charity appeal' for a terminally ill little girl. The appeal has been featured in local newspaper and radio and they want to raise half a million pounds to go towards seeking alternative therapies abroad and also a memory making Disney family holiday. I'm rather embarrassed to say that I have a few issues with this, due to the following:

The child is terminally ill. There is nothing, absolutely nothing that can be done to save their life or halt progression of this cruel and tragic disease. At best, these quack unproven treatments could only extend their life by a couple of months, at worse it would mean dragging a very sick child half way around the world on several exhausting journeys, which I'm not too sure would be in their best interests.

It is not correct to say this is a charity appeal. It is a crowd funder.

The kids think I'm being unreasonable. I'm ok with donating to one of the charities and foundations that fund research into this disease and I will happily do so. It's just that the crowd funder doesn't sit comfortably with me.

On the other hand I can wholly sympathise with her desperate family and have no idea whether or not I'd do the same in this situation.

Should I just keep my thoughts to myself and ride the wave of love shown to them by our local community, or go with my gut instinct that all this is probably not a very good idea?

Prepared to be told I'm a heartless evil witch.

Birdsgottafly Apologies I was wrong. Everyone I have ever seen dying has been very very ill in the days and often weeks and months before. I didn't know dying could be that easy, because it has not been in my loved ones. It has actually been fairly traumatic for everyone.

This isn't about approving of the choices that the poor family are making for their child. This is about showing love, support, solidarity and community.

I do think that it's Ok to disagree with the choices people make- however desperately sad their circumstances are. I am happy to give money to make life easier, for travel, hotel stays, holidays, fun and luxuries. I am not prepared to give money that will go into the pockets of evil, false hope offering snake oil sailsmen.

Crunchymint, I think for some symptoms palliative treatment is getting excellent. I'd been out of healthcare for five years, so it was a surprise to me that my Mum was a candidate for radiation to relive the symptoms of lung Cancer.

My FIl had systematic Cancer at the end and he was a lot more "well", than he had been 12 months before, because of palliative Care. He even got to go to an away game, driven by his Friends.

My DH went from a volunteer Gardner, to dying within three weeks, but only appearing ill in the last days.

Mine was complex because of an auto-immune condition.

I'm glad my Mum went as fast as she did, her friend next-door-but-one had collapsed in the street and died the same day and she always said she wanted to go the same.

It's tough going when it goes on and on, for everyone.

I can see your point of view OP but I'm not sure what you expect to achieve by not donating or protesting about this. The child is terminally ill, admittedly you are not going to change that by donating to the crowdfunder but you're not going to change that by refusing to donate either but only the latter will cause grief for your children.

Perhaps OP is more interested in showing solidarity and love to the sick child. Which, if there is indeed no hope (and this is possible) is more effectively displayed by not funding quack charlatans to exploit them. And you can't say it's not about approving the family's choices when she's literally being asked to help pay towards them. Giving money is just as much making a judgement, sticking your nose in, making it your business etc.