to ask which one of this women has the most desirable life?

[pancakesarebetterthanwaffles]

Just curious :) All are in their 40s.

Woman 1:
Earns 70K, works full time in a fairly flexible job from 8-5. Happy in her marriage, DH has a similar wage and job, 2 kids (13 year old and 15 year old.) Has at least 2 holidays a year, drives a BMW, has a lot of close friends but wished she worked less and had more time to herself.

Woman 2:
SAHM, spends all day at clubs, the gym, walking the dog, baking. DH earns 90K, her children are teens so no childcare involved. Has an amazing life with 2 family holidays a year and goes away with her friends once a year too. Is unhappy as she has a degree and used to earn 60K but wants the lovely life she has but feels bored and is constantly paranoid about her DH as he works away a lot.

I'm not either of them! Asking out of curiosity.

Definitely 1

I can't for the life of me fathom why anyone with teenage kids and older would want to be a SAHM tbh.

I studied for 5 years to have the career I have, I'm a single parent and nothing like as well paid as woman 1 but my job is fulfilling as I am able to make a real, tangible difference to peoples quality of life - I'm not just 'making someone else rich'.

Spending the day going to the gym and going for massages or whatever sounds tedious as fuck. Especially when in the back your mind you're thinking that if you let yourself go your husbands gonna be shagging his colleagues in a posh hotel somewhere.

That sounds like a horrible life. Money and having nice things is not what's important in life to me.

2

I didn’t bother to read the definitions as they’re irrelevant. The most desirable life is the happiest one. So out of your examples, the happiest.

Few life situations are fixed so I'd rather be option 1 as there is potentially room to reduce hours, take extra unpaid leave, make lifestyle adjustments to have financial independance, a career and enjoy family.

For me option2 ladies mental health is a concern. Her paranoia paralleled by apparent lack of financial independence makes her world quite fragile. If her DH did decide the relationship was over she'd potentially be in a very vulnerable position with DC older she'd potentially be having to find a house/ flat just for herself and get back I to a field of work that she's not done for years. Doable but an uphill battle.

You’ve told us in your post. You said one is happy and barely described any issues except wanting more free time, it was all great stuff. You said two is unhappy, insinuated about her dh having an affair, gets bored, and had actually planned on a different life to that (she has qualifications and used to have career.)

You’ve answered for us.

Is this just another chance for people to rain down their feelings on sahms? Like psychedelic ? Because not all sahms have a life like number 2. 🤦🏼‍♀️ Smh.