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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

My neighbor is having loud sex at 8:30 in the morning!

161 replies

Serendipite · 22/06/2018 23:48

They usually have loud sex (it's the woman we hear often) but this time, it's at bloody 8:30 in the morning!

What would you do?

OP posts:

HushabyeMountainGoat · 23/06/2018 11:25

It is good for them. I'd far rather that than hear them arguing with eachother.

I've lived in a terraced with thin walls so if it was likely to be long term i'd be thinking of ways to soundproof. Not just because i could hear them but because I wouldn't want to live knowing they could hear everything i did as well. Sometimes i like to sing, or have people over, or vacuum, or shag!

People shouldn't have to live in silence.

helacells · 23/06/2018 11:29

Once had neighbors like this and I confronted them and told them to stop the wailing. Never heard them again

harriethoyle · 23/06/2018 11:33

Absolutely right @sendintheArdwolves . A woman who has sex with different men is a "slapper"? The 1950s called, they want their casual misogyny back.

CantankerousCamel · 23/06/2018 11:57

I’ve just been called ‘the dirty whore next door’ by my neighbour in the street. I assume because I had sex with my husband at 9pm last night

Branleuse · 23/06/2018 12:00

@CantankerousCamel thats horrible . I wish we didnt have such a prudish culture. Its so fucking British. Its nearly always directed at women

Vitalogy · 23/06/2018 12:08

Of course they did Camel

Obviously non of you have kids about listening. Well, hopefully not anyway

MariaMadita · 23/06/2018 12:12

the dirty whore next door’

That's horrible.

I feel like I'd moan extra loudly if I were you... but then again, you probably have other (presumably decent) neighbours, they don't deserve that. Or else it might end up being a marcello marcello situation... (With the loud rooster )

I hope you gave him hell for that comment.

Andthatsthat · 23/06/2018 12:12

Hmmm....personally it makes me very uncomfortable hearing others at it. It’s bad enough hearing the odd occasion whilst away, so if I had to live next door to it, it would affect me. Especially if my children had to listen to it. I’m always mindful of others nearby when I dtd, I do think it’s inconsiderate to be overly noisy when you know others can hear, if no one is near however knock yourself out!

Not sure I agree with shaming anyone for it, but if this was happening regularly who knows.

So I guess I’m a prude but I’d rather that than having to avoid eye contact with the neighbours! I’m looking like the minority here though.

GladAllOver · 23/06/2018 12:34

He said this very loudly and was looking across at the other couple whose faces were a picture.

That's a bit mean-spirited imo.

It wasn't meant that way. He said it with a broad smile.
And we weren't the least offended by their morning enjoyment. Good luck to them. We had been equally pleasurable the previous evening, but our bed was on the hard ground floor so were unlikely to have been noticed.

Vitalogy · 23/06/2018 12:37

Sounds perfectly reasonable to me Andthatsthat

Laiste · 23/06/2018 12:46

So why did he feel the need to say it very loudly glad?

GladAllOver · 23/06/2018 12:58

I'll have to ask him.
But from their reaction they were not upset as they both looked up and smiled. In fact it broke the ice as we hadn't spoken previously other than 'good morning', but we then chatted about where we were going.

2blueshoes · 23/06/2018 13:03

If I was trying to have a lie in, it might be mildly annoying.

Sitting in the kitchen, drinking coffee, you're up and about. I genuinely don't see the problem.

Kittykat93 · 23/06/2018 13:47

I agree people have the right to make noise in their own homes, and there's no need for silent sex. But I really hate listening to porn-like moaning and screaming, it sounds like a performance. I've had extremely pleasurable sex in the past and have never felt the need to literally scream. especially not if there are kids next door.

Ethylred · 23/06/2018 13:55

Draw up a "loud sex" rota for them.
Including a bum sex slot.

Branleuse · 23/06/2018 14:02

Ive also had sex where i didnt need to make much noise, and ive also had sex where I wanted to scream, and have had to fucking muffle myself, which actually ruined my orgasm tbh.

What the fuck are you supposed to do if you like to make a bit of noise, but your neighbours are cunts about it? Ive seen threads like this hundreds of times and everyone thinks theyre oh so hilarious about changing wifi passwords to something PA or doing a round of applause. Youre not. Youre unfunny and cliched and need to unclench.
I have sympathy if its every night, but I highly doubt thats in most cases.

CantankerousCamel · 23/06/2018 14:51

She has form for being utterly nuts.

I don’t think we are particularly loud, we stay in the lounge so the kids are upstairs and we are down, they can probably hear us a little through the wall.

I don’t know that it does kids much harm anyway tbh

Deathraystare · 23/06/2018 15:45

Now we’ve got 2 kids and a dog in bed with us and Paw Patrol on the telly.

Not quite the same, is it??!!

SendintheArdwolves · 23/06/2018 16:37

@GladAllOver

But from their reaction they were not upset as they both looked up and smiled

Ah. So when you said "their faces were a picture" you meant "...of delight and joy that a stranger had heard them have sex and then decided to comment on it at breakfast"?

Cos you made it sound in your first post like you were pleased your husband had made them feel embarrassed.

GorgonLondon · 23/06/2018 16:40

Hilarious idea that 8.30am is early morning.

And people had to ask if OP has kids?

SendintheArdwolves · 23/06/2018 16:43

@Vitalogy

Did you not notice the man was called "slap"

Yeah, that's not really a thing though, is it? We don't call men we deem to be too sexually active a "slap" so it doesn't carry much sting. "Slapper" on the other hand is a really unpleasant word for a woman who is considered promiscuous.

So I don't think we can say that the disdain was shared equally in this case - it was mostly aimed at the woman.

ShinyMe · 23/06/2018 16:50

I used to have some very loud neighbours who made really squeally noises at 2 or 3am. It sounded like a pig being slaughtered. I once got so frustrated I played some Chas and Dave at them through the wall, and I never heard them again after that. They moved out a few months later.

CantankerousCamel · 23/06/2018 17:14

We are still co-sleeping hence the downstairs activities...

Neighbours will have to deal with occasional noise through the wall because it’s that or nothing

GladAllOver · 23/06/2018 17:20

Ah. So when you said "their faces were a picture" you meant "...of delight and joy that a stranger had heard them have sex and then decided to comment on it at breakfast"?

I said no more than that their faces were a picture. The rest is just your imagination.

Cos you made it sound in your first post like you were pleased your husband had made them feel embarrassed.

Again, that is just your imagination. I didn't say they were embarrassed - they seemed to take it in their stride.

MrsClutterworth · 23/06/2018 17:21

Definitely clap and cheer when they're done. That would be hilarious.

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