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Original poster

To think only buying teenagers a children’s meal is crap?

132 replies

BinG0wings123 · 16/06/2018 18:11

Ds (15) out with his dad, step mum and her two young teens for lunch today. Again, as soon as he can home his nose was in the fridge as he was only allowed a child’s portion.

He’s 5 foot ten.

They aren’t allowed the adult menu until they are 16.

Bloody bonkers.

OP posts:
Original poster
BinG0wings123 · 16/06/2018 19:15

Ds has said he’s asked lots of times when they go out and said it’s not enough. He gets told not to be greedy and it’s that or nothing.

It’s starting to make him limit the time he spends with his dad over the past couple of years. He won’t stay at his dads house for more than a few days at a time in the holidays because he’s always so hungry so it’s a massive shame.

There seems to be some food issues in the family. Ex h parents were always tight with food (two roast potatoes per person served with a roast dinner!) but ex h was never like that when we were together, so I guess his wife is the same as his family.

OP posts:
EdWinchester · 16/06/2018 19:20

That's ridiculous - especially with the size of him.

My teens would turn their noses up at the crap you normally get on kids' menus. Nuggets and cheap pizza or bland pasta? No way.

blackteasplease · 16/06/2018 19:24

dd9 has the adult menu and has done for years in some places.

At first it was because the children's menu is usually less nice but now it's also portion size.

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 16/06/2018 19:26

Your son is amazingly polite. Mine is about the same age/height and he would be very vocal about a child's meal not being enough for him- he is usually very well-behaved but he needs to eat a lot and I wouldn't like to be the person telling him that he couldn't!
It's worse that the same thing happens at his dad's house and it is bound to affect his relationship with his father.

kateandme · 16/06/2018 19:26

I feel sorry for your dc too because at that age id blood confront my dad.
make sure your dc knows this is disordered eating though.
especially with a dc this age growing and wanting/needing more and random appetities your dc need to know hes not greedy or at fault here.because his dad is treading dangerous grounds to do with food issues.

Matilda15 · 16/06/2018 19:29

How ridiculous. My DS is 7 and has outgrown the kids menu of most places. He either has an adult meal or a kids meal with an adult side. Can’t believe anyone would force a 15 yr old strapping lad to have a kids meal!

One of my best friends is the worlds fussiest eater (veggie but doesn’t like vegetables 🤨) so unless we are at pizza express or similar will order from the kids menu plus a side. But she’s too embarrassed to actually do it so my DS orders hers and she orders his and they swap when it arrives and swaps the empty plates at the end!!

DickTERFin · 16/06/2018 19:32

Christ on a bike, my five foot six thirteen year old, streak of piss can eat me under the table. If I made him order from the kids menu, I’m not sure he would ever speak to me again.

Even my eleven year old orders from the adult menu (although he can’t always finish it, but DS1 is usually there to save the leftovers from the bin) as he doesn’t like nuggets/pizza type food, which is usually what is on offer.

It does sound like food issues. Unfortunately people with extreme food rules are often immovable. I feel for your DS. Will it improve once he’s sixteen or will his portion sizes still be policed?

Lovemusic33 · 16/06/2018 19:38

My ex won’t let my dc’s have a adult meal when he takes them to McDonald’s, they are 14 and 12. Apparently it’s too expensive.

Today I took the dd’s Out and my 14 year old chose a child’s meal from the menu, she has Aspergers and is a picky eater and couldn’t find anything on the adult menu, I felt silly ordering a child’s meal, her 12 year old sister had a adults meal, if we eat out they can chose what ever they like, if I can’t afford to buy them a adult meal we don’t go out.

Pinkprincess1978 · 16/06/2018 19:40

My 10 year old DS has a melt down if we buy from the children menu now so can't imagine how a 15 year old would feel. Most places we go to say it's for under 12s only.

Original poster
BinG0wings123 · 16/06/2018 19:42

I don’t know what will happen when he’s older to be honest. I think he will probably stop going to stay there all together which I don’t want to happen at all.

He knows they are extreme with food portions and that he’s not greedy. He’s got a great diet, there’s nothing he won’t eat and I’ve never made issues out of food so thankfully, he’s got a good head on him.

The only time his stepmother has spoken to me about food issues is when ds was younger and saying he was hungry but turning down the fruit - ds said that her kids took bites out of apples and put them back and that they were the ones they were all told to eat later, so yuk.

I really do want him to have a good relationship with them, they are his family, but this food thing is nuts.

OP posts:
SneakyGremlins · 16/06/2018 19:44

Can he refuse to go for a meal?

SneakyGremlins · 16/06/2018 19:45

I know you're trying to avoid conflict OP but they need to see this is unacceptable.

Original poster
BinG0wings123 · 16/06/2018 19:45

He always says he won’t go, but his dad works away a lot so sometimes going for a lunch on a weekend is the only time he gets to see him.

OP posts:
kateandme · 16/06/2018 19:47

sounds like your doing all the right things and its great you still support and want him to be with his family.we all have I sure those in th family with some issues whether we agree or not with them we can still be family as long as it doesn't get damaging.

Starlight345 · 16/06/2018 19:47

How long till he is 16 ?

While ridiculous for your Ds . I wonder about s children to who never get to escape this regime

LiteraryDevil1 · 16/06/2018 19:48

My stbexh and his gf serve my 11 and 9 year olds the same size portions as they serve their 2 year old. Pudding is 2 chocolate biscuits HmmThey come home starving so I get your frustration. I've told them to ask for bigger portions but apparently they are told there isn't any more so I've now said to tell whoever is cooking that they are really hungry before they start cooking so they can cook more. So far nothing has changed. Both kids are naturally thin and always hungry so they can't afford to be given a toddler sized portion.

kateandme · 16/06/2018 19:49

has anyone stood up to them and told them they are being UR

MissCharleyP · 16/06/2018 19:50

Crazy! Like pp said I’m surprised they get away with it as most places it’s under 12. Could your DS suggest one of those Chinese buffet places? They often limit kids meals to those under 4’10” and at least he could eat as much as he wanted! Could you not speak to EXH and tell him how much DS eats at home or when you go out? And stress he’s not “greedy” (terrible for them to say IMHO) but he’s a growing lad who’s as tall as a full grown man and so his nutritional requirements are much more than that of a young child.

DontDribbleOnTheCarpet · 16/06/2018 19:53

They often limit kids meals to those under 4’10” and at least he could eat as much as he wanted!
That idea really tickled me, because about half of the adult women in my family are under 4'10! I'm imagining my 75 year old mother insisting on being measured so she could pay kids prices!

Original poster
BinG0wings123 · 16/06/2018 19:53

He’ll be 16 in January.

I’ve tried talking to ex h about it before. He knows it’s the reason that ds won’t stay with him for longer than a few days in the holidays but he won’t listen. It’s so frustrating.

Ex MIL was the same, told me I was greedy for wanting 2 slices of toast for breakfast instead of 1 when I was 8 months pregnant!

OP posts:
TwoGinScentedTears · 16/06/2018 19:54

God, what a strange way to treat your children. And what a funny battle ground to choose really, because your ds is going to remember this and he's going to stop wanting to spend time at their house/with them and all because they won't feed him properly when they have the means to.

SneakyGremlins · 16/06/2018 19:54

Can he go but not eat anything? Maybe lay on a guilt trip about not wanting to as clearly he's not allowed to enjoy a big meal?

I was screamed at once aged 14 for eating a big tin of ravioli for dinner Confused that was far too much apparently and I should have been ashamed of myself.

drinkyourmilk · 16/06/2018 19:56

That's disgraceful. My 9th centile whippet of a 14 month old can down a child's portion (not off child's menu btw!) In one sitting if she's hungry enough.
I'd say blow the consequences and tell your ex that ds avoids staying because he's hungry there. Offer to send him with extra cash for meals out. Remind him that biologically ds will eat massive amounts of food over the next few years.
The if it doesn't change and ds stops going you know you've done everything you can.

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 16/06/2018 19:58

That’s crap. I hate seeing people being stingy with their children’s food at restaurants.

RainbowGlitterFairy · 16/06/2018 19:58

It is pretty crap to decide portions by age. Dsis and my DS are both 14 (6 weeks difference) Dsis is tiny, she's 4'6" and most days a kids portion is plenty, DS is 5' 11" and plays a lot of sport, he's still peckish after an adult portion in some places. Both are the right weight for their height.

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