How the fuck am I STILL not pregnant????

[Goinginsane000]

Sorry, I appreciate that this isn’t an AIBU but I am at breaking point and hoping there’s more traffic here.

I have been TTC for 3 years. I was referred for NHS fertility treatment 2 years ago. Tests showed I have PCOS, as suspected. Put on Clomid, had a chemical preg after 3 months. Ovulated probably 10 times out of 12 cycles if I remember correctly. No further BFP for another year. 13 months ago I had a laparoscopy with ovarian drilling. Worked wonders, had a natural period for the first time ever (without needing drugs to bring one on). Continued on Clomid and ovulated every single month without fail. Got pg 6 months later but miscarried at 7 weeks. Was then put on Letrozole. I have ovulated on every one of the 6 cycles I’ve been on this but no fucking BFP. Due to the miscarriage, I had to wait another year for my IVF referral because you need to have not had a pregnancy in the past 12 months.

There must be something else at play, surely???? How can this be happening? Does anyone have any insight or personal experience of a similar history??

For what it’s worth, I am 30. Size 10, have eaten a mainly carb and sugar free diet for 3 years. I don’t smoke or drink much (because I am constantly “possibly pregnant”). I exercise regularly and can run 6 miles in just under 40 mins with zero effort. I take very good care of myself.

Seriously, WTAF!

After 5 rounds of ivf for my first (so I know how much this “journey” sucks), we used preseed when ttc #2. I was in the same boat and ovulating regularly without a bfp. First month we tried preseed I conceived. Doctor thought it could be my own cervical fluid could have been non-sperm friendly so it wasn’t reaching the egg in time.
Have you tried a fertility lubricant?

Op I'm not sure if you have considered the private route. We have been through 3 years of ttc and I fell pregnant in ONE month on fertility treatment at a private fertility clinic. There was an extensive and thorough amount of tests done and we were monitored throughout. If you can afford it maybe consider that.

After 4 years of trying, doggy style seemed to work for us, twice...Could be my weird anatomy due to endometriosis but thought it might be worth a mention 😁

And with all due respect, the fertility consultants don't have all the answers, by their own admission.

That's totes true, weevil. You should absolutely get the OP doing it 'doggy style' instead. Much more scientific.

I mean, Jesus wept.

Oh, other test that's worth getting OP is anti sperm antibodies for your partner

@AynRandTheObjectivist

Do you have a question for me?

@WeevilKnievel

How was doggy style not already in your repetoire??

@Goinginsane000 It is so hard, isn't it.

You are doing all the right things. IVF/ICSI does sound like the obvious thing to try . . . maybe consider going private while you wait? Look into the details, but I think you should still be eligible for the NHS cycle if the private cycle doesn't work, depending on where you are.

I would also recommend coming over to the infertility board to avoid getting the "infertility bingo" responses.

@WeevilKnievel I'm not TTC at the moment but will totally file that away under "endometriosis sex tips"

OP...it does sound really disappointing and frustrating for you , and i do sympathise, but unexplained infertility is sadly a fact of life for some people.
There is not an answer or happy ending for everyone.
you are not pregnant..because you are not pregnant....there are a small minority of women who ovulate every month , have super healthy lifestyles, and super healthy partners who don't get pregnant.
science and medicine do not have answers for everything and everyone.
And if you look at your story, when you ovulated every month following drilling you achieved a pregnancy at 6 months which would not be considered unusual delay in achieving pregnancy, then you were put on letrazole and have ovulated for the next 6 months but have not achieved a pregnancy. So in last 13 months of ovulating you have become pregnant once. I dont point this out to be harsh, rather to try to give you some hope. Since last pregnancy you have effectively been 'ttc' for 6 months, its not that unusual to for couples with no fertility issues to not be pregnant after 6 months either.

oh and i had unexplained anovulation and had clomid for 12 months at high doses, ovulated every month and did not get pregnant. TWICE...each time then achieved successful pregnancy with ivf

Quite normal with pcos sadly.

warwick.ac.uk/newsandevents/pressreleases/womb_natural_killer/

warwick.ac.uk/fac/med/research/biomedical/tem/bru/clinic/

Info on natural killer cells as mentioned by pp. Has to be self funded testing where I am but could be different elsewhere.

No idea if it would help you but has definitely helped some.

Good luck OP

So sorry to hear you’re going through this. I could actually have written it myself. I also have PCOS. 2.5 years of trying which totalled rounds of Clomid, 1 miscarriage at 11 weeks, 3 rounds of Letrozole and 1 failed IUI. We paid for IVF. It will happen for you...eventually. IVF might just be the magic you need though. Please don’t lose hope

• 9 rounds of clomid

It will happen for you...eventually. IVF might just be the magic you need though. Please don’t lose hope

I hope if happens for the op, but this really isn’t a kind or helpful thing to say. Unfortunately, not everyone gets a happy ending to their infertility.

Ah I know how stressful this can be. I had tests and stuff done but nothing ever showed up as the problem, so still have no idea what it was but it took me 6 years to get pregnant (and we were having sex a lot so it wasn't that..) and then I finally got pregnant and had a miscarriage at 12 weeks, right when I thought I was out of the 'danger zone'. I was terrified it would take another 6 years as I was not exactly 'young' but luckily I fell again just the month after m/c. Then after having DD, I fell pregnant with DS a few months afterwards.

I have no advice, besides try not to get yourself down over it all. I know thats hard. But its all I can suggest. As I said, there was never a reason found for us, I was tested and DH was tested too and everything came back ok. Seems it was just one of those random things.

LRDfeministdragon - Bitchy comments, what a disappointing feminist.😆

I know that after four years of trying I would have tried anything, who knows what will work, but the consultants don't know everything obviously or they would have a much higher success rate

@PurpleDasies, when battling infertility, hope is the only thing that you have to keep you going. She has PCOS. IVF tends to be very successful for ladies with PCOS. Don’t be so negative!

Ah an infertility bingo thread 😩

OP, you'd be much better off on the infertility board where you won't have to listen to so much relax/elevate your bum/just adopt crap

I don't know if you've had one but if not, I would recommend requesting an HSG to check for tubal patency and uterine health. I was ovulating every month, husband had excellent sperm and no sign of a BFP, had the HSG and it cleared some mild blockages of my cervix and tubes and boom, pregnant...obviously this may not be your issue because you have got pregnant previously but if even one of your tubes is blocked then it obviously reduces your chances by approximately half (assuming your ovaries alternate releasing an egg which mine didn't)

Infertility is shit, I wish you all the luck

I had similar problems - PCOS, recurrent miscarriage.

"Just relaaaaaaax" didn't work (and a hearty and sincere "go fuck yourself" to the previous poster who suggested it). IVF did.

Hi lass,

We were 10yrs of trying and had zero chance of Clomid or IVF due to our areas strict protocol and funding procedure - hubby was fine and I had PCOS.

My tubes were flushed out mid 2013 and after falling really ill and needing lumbar punctures and blood transfusion etc I fell pregnant and had dd1 in November 2014. That was after being told it would never happen.

Now as people said stress TTC is one of the worst as you think you've failed etc - I get it 100%.

Take a step back, look at your goal and see if your just aiming for the goal dates in conceiving and saying screw it- work that mattress every second day for fun.

It a defo possible, some people just take longer than others and need a little more intervention but take a breath and just go for it.

All the best.

@Teacakesrule yes @PurpleDaisies knows

She and I are long term members of the infertility boards

We both have extensive experience of infertility.

She is well aware of battling infertility!!

I recommend you do investigate auto immune conditions and also your thyroid function

Also I know it was mentioned above but ask your doctors if they recommend you take aspirin

I’d also very strongly recommend you have sex throughout the whole month despite your scans etc.

I am so sorry for your troubles and hope so much that things turn around. Good luck
Op x

I have always been advised to have sex every 3 days rather than 2, as the sperm are better quality if they are if they have longer to develop, but more than 3 days you might miss an egg. This advice has come from GPs rather than fertility specialists but it might be worth a try if you haven't tried this already. I have tried to have sex every three days until I think I've ovulated, and then bonus sex 1-2 days after.