Is she stealing?

[Gracie2906]

LO plays football for local team, lovely little team who did train with older boys until around a year ago when a set of parents from my LO age group took the team on.

The Dad trains the children (I use the world loosely, however he does his best and I appreciate that!) and mother takes the money & organises social events with the help of all us Mums when asked; although our suggestions go ignored.

I'm not convinced this set of parents haven't been 'dipping into' the kitty over the last year, but I have no proof other than a quick calculation of my figures don't match hers - but I can't prove it! So will have to let that slide for the mo!

Anyhow, it's the boys presentation this weekend and this mother has organised a DJ at the cost of £90 which will be paid from the kitty; my issue is our boys have no official kit (they just play in blue!), no training gear (DH asked could be buy some bibs this week for training and was told no, we don't have the funds), no training tracksuits, and some weeks during the winter not even the basic costs of hiring a venue were being covered so consequently it was paid out of the kitty. I said to Mum in question I think we should revisit the DJ idea, ultimately it's a presentation not a party and that's £90 that is the parents money so to speak which could be used towards the children not entertaining the adults - issue is she disagrees with me, she stated both her and husband want the DJ there to help keep the adults there later so more of a night out than presentation. She booked a Bouncy Castle for the children using £30 from kitty for the deposit and £70 of her own money to front the costs with the intention of claiming it back, then decided to cancel it when she realised it needed to be manned at all times consequently losing the £30 deposit paid from the boys kitty but ensuring she had her £70 back. I questioned this and asked her what we are gonna do about the missing £30 now as it's unfair the boys lose it, her response was "nothing we can do, we will live and learn "

I've asked on several occasions for a club bank account to be set up as it would be easier for many parents to pay DD but each time my request has been declined - is she hiding something? I'm concerned!

I don't mind helping at all, but don't want others to think I'm involved in this situ!

Any advice about the DJ would be greatly appreciated - how Can I say I think you're wasting the boys money? Or do you feel she's not? xx

Personally I'd go somewhere more organised if my child wanted to learn a sport. You need a proper coach

Leave them to and it and find a proper club, who needs that kind of hassle.

If the money's not properly accounted for it'll come to a sticky end

Are they insured? Sounds dodgy!

No no insurance, I've also raised this several times but no notice taken of me.

I would love LO to move teams, however, all the boys in his friendship group from school play for this team so easier said than done!

Can you offer your help to run it too ?

Yes and this past two weeks I've really been involved, and DH has also helped train them and took them for a match last week, but the money thing doesn't sit right more so with him but because I have very little knowledge of how football teams run so to speak; I wasn't aware of the issue with money til he brought it to my attention really.

I've tried making suggestions but it falls on deaf ears cos ultimately I think she feels her and her husband are in charge x

Do they play in a league? Do they come under the FA (or whoever runs kids football)? If so I think id be contacting the local body. Without insurance there's no way my kid would be playing and without proper financial organisation and rules they are leaving themselves wide open to suggestions of financial shenanigans. Id be having a mass defection to another team tbh.

Have you spoken to any of the other parents? You can't be the only one who is concerned. You may find that the entire friendship group would be happy to move to a properly organised club.

Spoke to one other Mum who I can trust, she's agreed to help me go through incomings since April.

I'll ask DH about your questions RE FA now x

DH says not part of a league or FA until this September when they will become U6s- the games they play are also just friendlies x

From team grassroots site:

Finance – income and expenditure to run the club

As a new club it will be important to raise funds to run the club and initially these will probably be from player memberships and subscriptions. It is also advisable to produce a list of costs to run your team which will help you create a budget of income and expenditure for the season.

Is the team registered with the county's FA?

www.teamgrassroots.co.uk/setup-your-own-club/

RE: kits so slightly off topic to the stealing, but would any local businesses be willing to sponsor their kit?

As parents we have raised a lot from rutter cards etc, but if I'm honest I'm the only one who seems to be fundraising.

To date I've sold;

3 rutter cards,
Gained 15 raffle prizes from local business'
DH has organised a World Cup sweep

Nobody else seems to be doing much!

May I add I know no other raffle prizes have been sought. Last weekend I was the one walking around a pitch selling raffle tickets for a bottle of wine!

It sounds as if the group does not have an official Treasurer function.

You need to suggest this. They don't need to be an accountant, but should be good with numbers & understand how to do spreadsheets.

Perhaps you can take on this role?

Also there should be a committee which should vote on any spending decisions. That should avoid issues like this cropping up in the future.

It's not hard to organise.

DH has his own business so is willing to sponsor them, however, he's reluctant to do so now cos so much money has gone awol.

From April to last week 10 boys have trained outside weekly being charged £2 a week, which equates to £220, I took £47 last weekend with raffle and rutter card plus subs - when I asked how much money was in the kitty she told me £38. Where the hell has all this money gone? Xx

You can't prove anything about theft and shouldn't make any accusation. But what you can do is ask for the kitty balance sheet to be issued say quarterly. See how your request is met. Say, you were talking to a friend and their club issues a kitty balance each quarter to contributing members, that way it's easier for members to make collective decisions with regards to kit, socials etc.
If the request is met with disinterest and they just don't do it, leave. Write them a letter saying why you are leaving - due to a lack of financial transparency.

i think you need to get your money back from the deposit for the non existent bouncy castle

do they have meetings?
AGMs?

Excellent ideas Extinct. I suggested these to DH last night. X

Great idea. Offer to be the treasurer. Simples.

Never any meetings, or AGMs. No financial transparency at all.

I need to make these suggestions, fully expect to be greeted with her thinking I'm accusing her.

Don't get me started on bouncy castle, they had actually booked the bouncy castle from our friends, and I can't see how our friends can be expected to return the £30 deposit ultimately they are operating a business and that's a non refundable deposit, however, I know the couple in question can't afford to put the £30 in they lost so to speak, yet; why should the children lose it?

Awkward all around! X

well she can think you are accusing her op or she can be more open, it is her problem if she thinks this.

Realistically, what is most likely to be happening is that they are using the club kitty box as a sort of dip in family loan pot for window cleaning, emergencies etc. It's probably got no cash left in it but is stuffed full of well-intended IOU's !!!!!! But that is their problem, and someone will need to go to the cash point and reinstate the correct balance.
I say this from experience, I hated being a club treasurer as my bloody DH was always dipping in for emergency tenners, so I stopped doing it! 😁

Don't coaches etc need to be DBS checked too?
I'd steer clear of the current set up if I were you....

I know parents mean well by running football teams but in this-day—and-age, clubs need to be properly structured, have safeguardimg policies, accounts, be insured etc. It is a bit of a minefield.

I,would also prefer a properly organised group and would consider moving this summer, (and boys move between clubs a lot over the summer) or see if a more established team would consider taking your team under their wings.

so the deposit never came back anyway,?