Is she stealing?

[Gracie2906]

LO plays football for local team, lovely little team who did train with older boys until around a year ago when a set of parents from my LO age group took the team on.

The Dad trains the children (I use the world loosely, however he does his best and I appreciate that!) and mother takes the money & organises social events with the help of all us Mums when asked; although our suggestions go ignored.

I'm not convinced this set of parents haven't been 'dipping into' the kitty over the last year, but I have no proof other than a quick calculation of my figures don't match hers - but I can't prove it! So will have to let that slide for the mo!

Anyhow, it's the boys presentation this weekend and this mother has organised a DJ at the cost of £90 which will be paid from the kitty; my issue is our boys have no official kit (they just play in blue!), no training gear (DH asked could be buy some bibs this week for training and was told no, we don't have the funds), no training tracksuits, and some weeks during the winter not even the basic costs of hiring a venue were being covered so consequently it was paid out of the kitty. I said to Mum in question I think we should revisit the DJ idea, ultimately it's a presentation not a party and that's £90 that is the parents money so to speak which could be used towards the children not entertaining the adults - issue is she disagrees with me, she stated both her and husband want the DJ there to help keep the adults there later so more of a night out than presentation. She booked a Bouncy Castle for the children using £30 from kitty for the deposit and £70 of her own money to front the costs with the intention of claiming it back, then decided to cancel it when she realised it needed to be manned at all times consequently losing the £30 deposit paid from the boys kitty but ensuring she had her £70 back. I questioned this and asked her what we are gonna do about the missing £30 now as it's unfair the boys lose it, her response was "nothing we can do, we will live and learn "

I've asked on several occasions for a club bank account to be set up as it would be easier for many parents to pay DD but each time my request has been declined - is she hiding something? I'm concerned!

I don't mind helping at all, but don't want others to think I'm involved in this situ!

Any advice about the DJ would be greatly appreciated - how Can I say I think you're wasting the boys money? Or do you feel she's not? xx

My response to that would be “that’s cool, would you mind just providing a balance sheet so we can keep an eye on how much we are raising. Then we can think about kit and extras for the boys with the extra cash”

“Obvs you want to be transparent with the money side as it leaves you really open if people ask x”

I'd ask to see a copy of the club accounts.

If you really don't want to move your ds then let him carry on, but remove yourself from any fundraising or money completely. You don't want to be implicated when it all goes tits up.

You should also encourage them to register as a charity or CASC, OP.

www.gov.uk/register-a-community-amateur-sports-club

I'd also make your suggestions publicly on the FB page, they may gain some support.

If they don't take it seriously, I'd leave them to it. I'd also post about why we were leaving.

Did no one ever ask what the £3 and £2 is for, explicitly? Could you say “I’ve hit a friend who wants to join, just wants to know what the fees are for if you have no outgoings.” That would open up the conversation about money so you could then get on to asking where it’s all gone

Answer ok fine, just that we need to be a bit more organised when joining the league but I am sure you and DH have it in hand, let me know if you need any help

I also think you need to look around for other clubs. When mine joined I didn't know any clubs in our area but once you get into the system, they are absolutely everywhere (Ok depending on where you live of course)

I moved my youngest from a poor team with poor organisation to a better club and have not at all regretted it, he fit in easily and very quickly to the new team.

Good luck

I agree with a few suggestions - reply something along the lines suggested above or something like “Ok, excellent! Could you please send over the accounts for the last season? It’s important that we all have transparency so we can assess where and how to save money for kits etc”

If you are a involved fundraiser, can you call a meeting ostensibly to talk about fund raising for kit, then raise the finance issue and ask about the insurance etc, at the meeting in front of everyone. You can ask them in front of people how much of the the subs and fundraising money, is left for the kit.

I'm sure they mean well, but this sort of 'casualness' with managing other people's money is never a good idea. I

Having a treasurer is not the only thing they need. I wouldn't do it, as you'll end up having to sort out a whole load of things e.g. DBS checks, insurance etc. Even supposing they even let you know and control the funds. Which you would have to do.

t sounds very unprofessional, so I'd find somewhere else for your DS to train.

Would you and some of the other mums be able to set up your own team and take the rest on your one? If that's possible.

Im not sure how you could reply to her text as it seems to me that she deffo wants to stay in charge of the money, and if she isn't willing for a treasury etc it sounds like she is stealing, especially as they asked your husband to buy the bibs as surely that's what she should be buying with the money.

Or would it be possible to report her?..sorry I'm not much help.

I wouldn't stick with the team simply because your child's friends are there, he will make new friends in a new team.

The more you post the worse it sounds

You realy ought to have a treasurer and co treasurer that way there is a far reduced risk of anyone doing any nasties it can and does happen someone may feel, I'm a but short this week I'll "borrow" a few quid from the footie funds and then that gets out of control;(

As to the footie shirts why not try to get a local firm to sponser them?

For most business that sort of cost isn't anythiung they'd miss and its good publicity for them

This cricket team have done rather well!

www.mickgeorge.co.uk/burghley-park-cricket-club

As you're contributing to the club, you're absolutely entitled to know exactly what's in the club's bank account and what it's being spent on. They're handling money on behalf of the group of parents, and have to be accountable.

A local group for the elderly that I help out with let the treasurer just get on with her job undisturbed, until they realised she'd been robbing them. They found out that she'd emptied the group's bank account of several thousand pounds in various withdrawals over the year, and was blithely going about her life without a sign that anything was wrong. It took a red final demand for the electricity bill being sent on a day she wasn't in, for anyone to even realise anything was wrong. She'd been brushing off all attempts by anyone to see the accounts, and they let her, despite the club being run properly with board members etc. Now she's been removed entirely and TWO treasurers now have to sign for all withdrawals, payments etc. That's a lot of money to go missing, and all from pensioners who have very little.

If they've nothing to hide, they'll be open and allow all of you to see what's there. If there's any prevarication, you probably have a fraud on your hands.

Can you speak to other parents to see about challenging them?

Is it really their choice to control it?

As a PP said, it sounds like time to organise a fundraising meeting, at which you raise the topic sideways, eg; "In the last quarter we raised £ via subs, £ via donations, £ via cakesale, to a total of £x. We spent £ on X, and CF has informed me that we have £38 left in the kitty. CF, what was the balance spent on?"
Then pause. And don't say anything until she squirms enough to provide an answer.
Probably wise to give a heads up to at least a couple of others, so they don't let it be brushed aside with a distraction.

The following is my opinion. You should research the legalities yourself, but this might be a way forward.

If this is a small non-ofsted activity club put together and run by parents for their own (and others) children, then it does not usually need to be registered with Ofsted.

However there are still regulations that such an activity group needs to abide by ... for example they must have appropriate insurance and relevant DBS checks, among other things.

Employment legislation and national insurance apply to activity clubs, although I'm guessing your club has no employees, just parent volunteers. However, of particular interest to you I would think, the relevant tax laws apply (even if the club does not have enough income to pay tax) so accounts must be kept.

I would think that the easiest way (for the club) to keep track of all these things is by having a small committee.

There is some useful information and links here www.outofschoolalliance.co.uk/activity-clubs

On the other hand, if this club is not a club put together and run by parents for their own (and others) children, but is in fact a small business owned and run by the couple you have mentioned, then they are bound by all the usual legislation affecting small businesses plus all the legislation affecting small businesses who provide a service for children.

Perhaps the first thing is to establish which of these things the club is. Either way, it does sound as if it is already not meeting it's legal requirements, so the couple may welcome help.

I’m way too invested in this I know, but I really want to know where the f the money is and what the f these people have spent it on!

It's not a club and never will be, it's their wee sideline business with a myriad of compliance issues. That's the reality. I'd walk away and find a more structured club for my child.

So do I sausage rolls!

I'm 5 months pregnant too and been in tears over it cos I feel awful if she was to think I was accusing her but I can't see how it's not her?

"No thanks, me and DH took the team on so we shall continue as we are for now, I’m quite happy looking after the money."

She's bold!

"Awkward - what Can I say to that!" How about this >>>

"Oh no, I am sorry! I didn't realise the Club was your own Small Business. I'm so embarrassed, as I've probably been poking my nose in left, right and centre. I just didn't know. That does raise another issue though, as DH's DBS certificate will only then be valid if used in conjunction with your business insurance. Will that be a problem?"

Gracie2906

I would be amazed if they haven’t been swindling funds! And you have every right to ask to see accounts. Particularly after her last response. She also should absolutely put 30£ for the bouncy castle back into the kitty.

Yes to @DeaflySilence !!!

I think I'd be cutting my losses and moving my child to a properly structured and run club, with real accountability (in all respects, not just money - are these people even insured and have their PVG certification?). There are so many legislative hoops regarding working with vulnerable groups nowadays that I'd be looking for some assurance that they're doing things properly.

Seriously get out now. I've been involved in charities and committee for years and there's so much legislation surrounding it all you can get caught up Ina right old shit storm very easily.
She's obviously power crazy and it taking YOUR money and spending it how SHE wants.
There' needs to be a recognised committee, with a chair, secretary and treasurers, a bank account ( I'm assuming she's using her privately bank account, so how does she distinguish between her money and club money?) that requires 2 signatures on cheques and above everything else TOTAL TRANSPARENCY.
She's either a very clever conwoman or thick as shit.
I suggest you find a proper club ( what they being taught by the dads? Each dad's own ideas of how the game should be played?!) and your son will make new friends, he's only young.