to think these children ARE overweight?

[OkMaybeNot]

The schools in my area have just sent out the results of the National Child Measurement Programme.

There are a number of acquaintances/friends on my social media who have posted their child's result online, along with a picture of their child and an angry rant about how their child is as skinny as a rake, not an ounce of fat on them, 'stocky' not 'fat', perfectly healthy etc etc.

But they are. Some of them are very overweight and plainly so. Others may be a little bit chubby and due for a growth spurt or something, but clearly not slim, either.

There are streams of comments underneath these posts agreeing and expressing their disgust and anger. And I'm wondering if everyone's lying, or they genuinely believe that these children are slim?

I know BMI is notoriously squiffy when it comes to kids, and I have seen genuine cases of it being so totally wrong it's laughable, especially when it comes to strong, athletic children. But that isn't the case for these children, at all.

AIBU to think that you owe it to your child to at least consider the results before going on the defensive?

The norm is now for children to be overweight so our perspectives are skewed. It’s amazing how this varies from region to region though. I live in a prosperous part of London and you just don’t really see fat children or adults.

And yet people deny there’s a link between poverty and obesity.....

Flower littlehampton has the percentage of overweight or very overweight children in the trust.

Highest**

BMI is bullshit but I am constantly shocked at what other parents feed their children. Constant chocolate, biscuits and cake in portions big for an adult. And fizzy drinks. My DS is only 10 months but I’m already worried about nursery feeding him puddings and considering how I’ll stop other parents feeding him crap when he goes round to play etc without seeming snobby?

There's a Mum at my local pre school and during half term we hosted a teddy bears picnic and invited older siblings and family members - we had games, raffles etc and did it as a bit of a fundraiser;

This lady has 3 girls age 4, 6 and 8.

The children are all massively overweight with huge tummys and all of them were out of breath running about but when I saw her picnic bag it was full of junk food and fizzy pop!!!!!!!

Everyone was looking, as she was feeding them complete junk including the other children. I'm on the PTA and when we were clearing up after it was the talk of the staff and all the PTA.

The most bizarre thing was she was eating a pot of salad but obviously doesn't care about her kids being healthy. It's such a shame.

YANBU. Whilst there are a few genuine outliers BMI is an accurate measure for most adults and children. I think people forget that pre-puberty, it is normal and healthy for children to have very little fat on them.

Whether or not 'fat-shaming' is appropriate or useful depends entirely on what is meant by the term. If it means insulting and ridiculing overweight people then no, count me out. But if it means having honest conversations with close friends and loved ones about their health (in the same way many of us would do if they lost a lot of weight), then yes, I think that's needed.

My DD has friends who, aged 6/7 were already overweight and doing everything possible to avoid any sort of physical activity. They'd sit down during their school break times, avoid PE and Sports day where possible, even turn down invitations to parties involving any sorts of physical activity, eg trampolining or roller skating. I know not all children are naturally coordinated or competitive enough to want to participate in proper sports, but most kids love a bounce on a trampoline, surely?!

Sometimes I think it's portion size that makes a big difference and that this is more important for weight gain than whether the food is healthy or not.

Some parents seem completely clueless about how children's portions should be smaller than adults.

I fed on demand and when bottle feeding with expressed milk followed the same mindset. Some friends seemed adamant about ensuring babies finished their bottles. They seem to be the same about children finishing meals.

People seem unable to determine when to stop eating.

the school confirmed that height had not been taken into consideration (WTF!)

This is a big problem imo. Centile wise, my ten year old is above the 99th for weight. But he matches it in height and is markedly taller than all the other boys in his class. To not take height into account is ridiculous.

Ary2017 If they’re anything like the “cakes” they serve at my sons nursery then I wouldn’t worry too much. They have no sugar in and taste so crap that most of the kids pass in favour of fruit (which at least has some flavour)

The NCMP policy is to do height and weight to create a bmi. I find it hard to believe they would only do weight. Also it's worth noting that no member of staff from school should be present when the measurements are taking place and individual results are not shared with schools.

"the school confirmed that height had not been taken into consideration (WTF!)"

That must just be one school, doing it's own thing.

The national measurement programme is hosted by schools but they don't actually do the measuring, so would not be answering questions about that programme (so it must refer to one of their own devising, not the national scheme. Which does measure both height and weight.

I HATE with a passion that school dinner includes a pudding every sodding day. It’s habit forming. Nursery only gives fruit or plain yoghurt with fruit 4 out of 5 days, I wish schools would do the same

It's not all diet. My kids live on terrible food and they are still in the healthy weight. They must burn it off. DS1 eats huge portions too and is very lean.

School dinners had puddings every day back in the 60s and 70s - the time which seems to be held up as when the children were on the whole, not obese.

Don't you think that as a society we seem to have normalised being overweight?

I'm not suggesting day shaming, however someone mentioned the smoking campaigns. One of the most successful things for smoking was also making it socially unacceptable. Perhaps we need that, in a way that doesn't fat shame?

We need to stop calling it puppy fat which sounds cute & call it parent fat. I was overweight years before I was able to buy/cook my own food. There are photos of me at a really young age with adult sized portions of food, ice creams, chocolate bars etc. Quite sad really.

@I also agree that kids do need snacks. Your brain alone uses an incredible amount of energy and DS1 especially has a tender by to get 'hangry' if he doesn't snack regularly

Odd that kids didn't 'need' snacks before 1980 or so. 😒

I'm not suggesting day shaming, however someone mentioned the smoking campaigns. One of the most successful things for smoking was also making it socially unacceptable. Perhaps we need that, in a way that doesn't fat shame?

It was the passive smoking aspect that made it socially unacceptable. The fact that cigarette smoking harmed other people and was unpleasant to be around. Those arguments do not app,y to fat peop,e, though of course some peop,e do find fat people unpleasant to be around.

We had snacks when we were growing up, they just weren't called snacks.

They were called illicit sugar sandwiches when mum wasn't looking

But we did eat between meals when we had the chance, I seem to recall. We were just too busy to bother most of the time. That's the real difference, I think; activity levels.

I really needed a snack when I was younger and wasn't allowed one. One of my over riding memories of my childhood after school is constant hunger and being miserable because of it. My children are ravenous when they come out of school and they have their dinner at 4.30-5pm. Oddly they don't snack at that time on weekends as they seem to eat a better lunch when at home. I think longer than 4hrs is too long between eating. For me too.

I think a lot of children pre 1980 just accepted being hungry and uncomfortable as the norm because complaining was dealt with in a very different way.

If you are burning your calories and hungry then you should eat. I think being active is the key. Our nanny said she looked after a girl who got the 'overweight' letter and she sys she had the healthiest diet of any child she had seen, but she was completely inactive. My kids have the worst (we actually cheer if we can get them to eat a McDonalds) yet are considered healthy. I'd way rather a slightly overweight child who ate vegetables/dairy/fruit than a child who only ate utter shite and had to have vitamins and laxatives, but ticked the right box on the bmi chart. Thin people aren't always healthy people.

Koala my dc are the same. Ravenous after school but on non school days they never have an 'afternoon snack'

They also have a later lunch when at home. They have their breakfast at 8.15am, then school give snacks at 10.30, then they have lunch at 11.45 - noon. So that's quite close together. Then they are expected to go from 12 - 6?pm without food. It's not sensibly/evenly spaced. They don't need a mid morning snack (which mine don't eat anyway), they need a mid afternoon one - which is 3.15pm when they get picked up.