To think that having kids over 60 is odd

[Ineedaginandtonic]

So this woman who I know through some friends is 64 and decided to have another child, she has 2 older children who are in their late twenties now..

Obviously wishing her the best with her pregnancy, I’m not interfering just generally thought that it is a bit unfair on the child how when they are 10 their mother is going to be 75 and at 30, she will be 95 years old..

Aibu or is it a bit unfair on the child?

Each to their own.
Wouldn't be for me though!

If she has a young partner then it's a very similar set up as many old men who have kids in their 60s and 70s.

I don't think it is very fair. Also no child wants to go to school and have other children mistake their mum for their granny.

How is that even possible? Surely even the most fittest 60 year olds body couldn't cope with that sort of strain on their body?

And his is she planning to achieve this pregnancy when she's post menopausal?

I may be a little slow but how is that even possible?!?!

Totally unfair to the child I think.
There must be a lot of medical procedures (and money) involved in getting pregnant at this age too.
I am nearly that age. I wouldn't want the sleepless nights etc. You just don't have the same energy you had when you were younger.

She's actually pregnant?

Jeez Louise nope not for me.
I also think that nature takes it's course (menopause) for a reason.
(Not talking about early menopause or anything like that, just the usual one in your 40's ish)

I'm assuming she will have to go abroad for treatment as I don't believe a British medical team would agree to it.

I think it's selfish. If she is still fit and healthy why not look into fostering and care for children who need to be loved and cared for.

It would be a huge strain on her body... then she's got a year of night feeds / wakening, probably longer. It could be very dangerous. And how would it even be possible??

Yes I think it’s very unfair, and completely selfish. Of course people can die anytime - my dad just died suddenly at 60 - but the older you get the less time you know you’ll be around for your child.

Personally, I think it's selfish. Even the most fit bodies would struggle, will she have the energy to run around after a toddler all day? How long will it take her to have this baby? She may be 70 running after a toddler, it doesn't sound right.

I agree it's a q of how many people on average are entirely healthy after a certain age. Most people i know over 60 have /had something.
Having said that we are going to be expected to work till 68+++. My mum (and dad) are both not entirely with it mentally at 70 they cant keep up with the dc, get too tired. My mum will take the toddler and then let go of their hand when near danger water etc. With no effort to run after them.
Not sure how common on average dementia kicks in.

This isn't each to their own, this is utterly selfish

My DGF passed away in his early 70s, all of my DP's DGP passed away in their 70s too, it's not uncommon. Has she even considered that she could be leaving a child under 10 without a mother? I know it's always a possibility at any age, but this is high risk and really irresponsible in my opinion. If she expects her own kids to raise her child in that event, just stick to having grandkids...

Isn't Brigitte Neilsson currently 64 & pregnant? Sure I read about it recently....

Madamegerbil She’s 54 and pregnant. Looks like quite near to full term going by the photos.

Er did she have IVF?!

Are you just posting this to garner opinions for a news story? Because that's how this reads. Anyway if this is a true scenario, the chances of her becoming pregnant at that age are so vanishingly small that I just couldn't waste head space thinking about it.

How? By adoption surely? If so she may not get a newborn?

My mum is in her 60's and she says that looking after a toddler is so hard now. She has spent her entire adult life working with kids but retired from it a couple of years ago cause she no longer had the energy. I dunno how someone in their 60's Would cope full time with a baby. I also don't see how it's medically possible.

A post menopausal woman has a baby the same way lots of younger women who can't use their own eggs, or who have been through premature ovarian failure, get pregnant. They use donor eggs. This woman will have had to go to Cyprus as most clinics have a cut off of 50, however there is one clinic in Cyprus who don't.

Come on! We agree that women should be able to choose to have kids in and out of wedlock, so why not over 60s? Why is it more 'embarrassing' to have an older mum, than a single mum or a poor mum? We wouldn't criticize a women with terminal cancer for having a child she may not see grow up, so why an older woman?

Either you support choice, or you don't.

@Madamegerbil, she’s 54 not 64 and, yes, has recently announced she is pregnant. As is Rachel Weisz at 48. Both have enough money to be able to employ suitable support to manage being older mothers. However, I think 64 is too old.

You can have IVF and lots of hormones pumped into you throughout the pregnancy to maintain it (as a post-menopausal body is simply not supposed to be pregnant - so it's quite a major intervention).

It wouldn't be for me either - I wouldn't want another baby now, let alone when I'm retirement age. Sleepless nights, toddler tantrums, noise, mess, potty training, starting school all over again - bleugh!