To think bringing kids up on no money would be misersble

[Strawberryblues]

I earn 35000 or thereabouts. Its not terrible. It means I only get cb.

After bills not much left.

How do people do it?

Nursery costs that for two children.

@ElderflowerWaterIsDelish au pairs really aren't suitable for looking after pre school aged children. They are largely unqualified youngsters who are here to learn English.

I'm raising a child on less, although I'm above entitlement to tax credits. Before she started school we were below the breadline. She doesn't remember how tough it was, because naturally it was me who went without.

Now we manage just fine, and due to budgeting skills she has as much as many dc from homes with twice that income. And except for anything involving gas, or if it came to it any complex electrics, I do all diy myself. And a lot of car maintenance. I/we also have other non cash privileges that allow for an otherwise expensive hobby to be done at a competitive level.

Private school too but that's a red herring, it's a scholarship and bursary, otherwise my cheaper housing would mean the failing secondary.

Fwiw I come from a wealthy background, traditionally it would be described as upper mc. I envied my very poor, but happy best friend her family and home life. And my dd has one hell of a happier childhood than I did. There are far more important things than money to raise happy dc.

@Strawberryblues ok, are you calculating your free childcare hours?

Money def helps a lot. I'm a single parent earning 27k. Rent is my biggest expense by far being 42% of my take home pay.
I only get CB too. After my bills car and food there is very little left.

I'm Unemployed and claiming Universal Credit which is less than £1000 a month.

it covers rent, gas and electric and essentials but there's no room.for extravagant treats, savings or holidays.

we just lower our 'expectations'
instead of eating out regularly, well have a chippy once a month.
no takeaways.
no sky TV.
we have day trips to the seaside and an ice creams or drives out to the country side for walks and picnics etc instead of holidays abroad.
we don't spend much on food and bulk cook Bolognese and chilli.

but, most importantly, we're not miserable.
possessions aren't important, holidays abroad don't matter, having a fancy car or a big house is unimportant to me. I'll wear £7 ASDA jeans cause I'm not bothered about labels. DD is fed, housed, clothed and warm.

DH and I earn £31k between us after tax. At the moment I'm on maternity leave and only qualify for stat so its even less. We have one DS (4 months) and so far we manage just fine. I think because we've been far worse off in the past, this seems like easy living.

£805 rent
£260 food (including formula and nappies)
£50 water
£70 electric & gas
£135 council tax
£80 phonebills combined
£15 spotify (we choose this over a tv license)
£90 debt repayments
£21 car tax

• We get child benefit of £80 a month.

We both end up with about £150 - £200 each spending money for the month.

Elderflower - Au pairs are just untrained teenage babysitters, they're not a replacement for regulated childcare for a baby! Plus their pocket money is just part of the cost, there's also feeding them, taking them on family outings, contributing to their phone/travel/language classes etc.

Forget it.

Signed an overprivileged clueless twonk.

There's a calculator on www.entitledto.com which could help you work out what you would get in tax credits etc. Are you looking to leave your partner?

Jesus Christ, do people really believe that we all steal and have payday loans

We budget, it's not easy but we are happy, the kids are happy.

Some people on MN really have no clue.

I've had income varying from about 30k to much higher now. I have to say I do think you just get accustomed to whatever you have and then it becomes hard to imagine having less. (I don't actually feel my life has changed noticeably having more). I do wonder how people manage on low incomes but I definitely don't assume they just get into debt I think they've just got better at managing finances and spending wisely.

We can't afford childcare costs, its more than one salary, so I am a SAHM and I try and get work at evenings and weekends

MalcolmFucker, people look at their income, imagine halving it, realise they couldn't afford to live, and conclude that the only way to get by is to steal and take out loans.

And the people who do steal and take out payday loans aren't known for their financial security are they? All the people I know who take out payday loans are on the bones

OP do you have 2 children? How old are they?
Most people wait for their funded hours to kick in before having their second, which means it won’t be 2 full time nursery places. I had 2 under 2 which meant it wasn’t financially viable for me to return to work at that point.
You are getting very defensive when people are just answering your question. What are your circumstances? If you give more information people can try and help.

using my outgoings:

Council tax £40
Gas £20
Electric £20
Water £20
TV licence £12
Wi fi £40
Mobile phone contract £6
car so tax (depends on car. mines £0)
mot, (once a year not monthly)
insurance, £35
petrol. £30

Then food costs over a month. £100
Clothing (not monthly outgoing)
Extra curricular activities (unnecessary expenditure)

total: £323

Worse to bring them up when you can't spell miserable imo.

I have 2 children and after childcare a salary of £1945 per month. It’s never been miserable.

You adjust OP....you adjust. So instead of buying packaged biscuits or cakes as a treat, you bake your own muffins a couple of times a week.

You don't buy new clothes...or rarely. You buy them from charity shops...but you enjoy them as much as you would something new.

You don't get regular hairdos...they're rare. Small things but things which you get used to.

Husband earns £36k
I earn around £150 a week, sometimes more

We live well, we have a cleaner every other week and a gardener every week through the summer.

The boys have access to after school clubs if they wish, we have a car. I can buy things to upgrade the house and garden frequently...

We are paying off quite a lot of debt, mostly because we have been quite poor up til now. We are not eligible for anything but CB which is a huge help.

Currently we are putting £200 a month away to buy our home, this goes to my mother, who will put it away for us until January.

I would love to work just a little more... earn just a touch more as it would make life so much easier. But we are comfortable and I’m not sure we would be comfortable on much less

Well it's more than the average earnings, so not impossible

It also depends on where you live. Housing in costs in London are a lot higher than Linconshire for example. If you're thinking of children, then it depends on who you choose to father them, and what he could contribute.

It all to do with priorities says the one that had her house bought for her by her parents and has a term time only job so no holiday childcare costs

Housing and childcare costs are whatcrack up. Also depends on where you live and whether you’re eligible for social housing or not.

I earn similarly to you, OP, and that figure wouldn’t cover rent and bills on a flat in my area of a London, sadly, let alone childcare.

People do it on much less, but those I know have council flats with lower rents and many get benefits.

what rack up

I was never over the poverty line growing up. Nothing miserable about it.