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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

My neighbour is having sex in his car outside my house

96 replies

Jonsey79 · 31/05/2018 23:38

I was having a lovely, early night and was fast asleep until about 15 minutes ago when I was awoken by a car engine idling away right outside. It's my neighbour.

The parents are away and the 17 year old son is being dropped off by his girlfriend, except they are having sex in the car.

I've got the windows open because it's warm and I can't very well shut them now because they'll see me.

Effing engine is idling away, which is what woke me and why I looked out. Obviously I quickly hid on the floor when I saw them and haven't looked back since.

Bleurgh.

Also, how impractical must it be? It's only a Fiesta, it's hardly roomy.

Dh is asleep so I can't discuss it with him.

OP posts:
Jigglyguff · 31/05/2018 23:49

Or shout out the window "hi! (randy teenagers mum's name)! You're back early!"

Original poster
Jonsey79 · 31/05/2018 23:50

They've finished! I heard his gate bang (no pun intended) and she drove off. Bit of an anticlimax really.

Next time I see him I'll raise my eyebrow disapprovingly I think. Or wink or something.

OP posts:
Original poster
Jonsey79 · 31/05/2018 23:50

Some of your suggestions are hilarious GrinGrin

OP posts:
Original poster
Jonsey79 · 31/05/2018 23:53

Deep down I'm probably jealous because when I was that age my then boyfriend had a scooter with L plates throughout our entire relationship, so I never had the opportunity. I'm too old and sensible now.

OP posts:
blaaake · 31/05/2018 23:53

I used to get up to all sorts in my fiesta aged 18 Blush they are roomy!!

Timeissliplingaway · 31/05/2018 23:54

Next time you see him judt say turn the engine off next time son, some of us were trying to sleep.

Littlechocola · 31/05/2018 23:55

Ask if you can borrow the car?

Bouledeneige · 31/05/2018 23:57

Well, I say....

RomeoBunny · 31/05/2018 23:58

Fiesta back seats are huge. Especially the 3dr mk6s. Like 6ft and 14st & 5ft6 and 12st is still comfy 😁

They're well padded too. Extra bonus for tinted windows.

ShellyBoobs · 31/05/2018 23:59

Ask if you can borrow the car?

With spunky seats?

BloodyBosch · 01/06/2018 00:03

Stop him and ask him questions about the size of her car, innocently of course... he will be squirming as he won't be certain but he will definitely think you know!! Even more points if you do it in front of his parents, who will be oblivious!!

Original poster
Jonsey79 · 01/06/2018 00:03

I can only hope it was her car and she hasn't borrowed it from her parents!

OP posts:
InsomniacAnonymous · 01/06/2018 00:05

I can't understand why on earth you were worried about them seeing you!

TheDishRanAwayWithTheSpoon · 01/06/2018 00:06

I've got a fiesta advert at the bottom of this page, maybe mn is trying tell me something

I think you should just give him a little raised eyebrow and a smirk next time you see him, nothing too obvious just enough to make him worry

BlueEyedBengal · 01/06/2018 00:08

Go out and give the bonnet a good banging and tell them to piss off and get a room you randy bastards. Married people are trying to sleep.ShockHmmWink

PurpleTigerLove · 01/06/2018 00:09

Go out and knock on their window

BonnieF · 01/06/2018 00:10

This brings back happy memories of steamy windows my boyfriend’s old Peugeot 205.

Happy days Wink.

KeepServingTheDrinks · 01/06/2018 00:10

DAMMIT! if she's driven off, it's too late for my suggestion.

Which was a polite note on the windscreen advising of the poor environmental affects of leaving your engine idling.

MargotLovedTom1 · 01/06/2018 00:12

Next time you see him start singing "Why Don't We Do It In The Road?" by The Beatles Wink.

Cel982 · 01/06/2018 00:13

Oh, to be young again...

MargotLovedTom1 · 01/06/2018 00:15

And yes, I had plenty of shenanigans in my then boyfriend's XR2 when I was a 17 year old - he was raring to go and I was a hell of a lot more flexible than I am now. Happy days.

ProudThrilledHappy · 01/06/2018 00:16

Fyi for next time OP mumsnet law dictates you supply a diagram GrinWink

liverbird10 · 01/06/2018 00:18

Am I the only one who could never be arsed with shagging in a car?

Well, clearly I am. Grin

salsmum · 01/06/2018 00:19

Shuffle out with the wheelie bin or the glass recycling bin Grin

CatOwned · 01/06/2018 00:29

Next time you see him:

"Don't worry, NDN, your secret is safe with me." And wink.

or maybe, if you are feeling especially evil:

"Gosh, aren't my other NDN inconsiderate? I could hear them! Thank god the poor lad was a virgin and it was over before I could blink."