Softzilla, the police

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

I can't update just now but here's the new thread. I will update later when I can.

It was difficult when it was my ex, because he never actually threatened me. This was about 10 years ago now though.

Can someone give me the in a nutshell version of why the police have now got involved? I've been reading these threads from the very beginning but I'm now really confused!

Sorry guys for the delay. Only reason I opened this thread so soon was that I had a couple of emails come through from mumsnet so thought I'd check the thread quickly. I saw there were only a couple of spaces left and people asking for a new thread so I did it quickly. However I didn't want to be typing for ages as party mum had come over for a favour (I got so upset when the police came over they asked me to call someone to come over before they left) and that would be rude. If you bare with me a minute I will update what was said (But I'll leave out the streaming snotty mess).
As always feel free to report, totally happy for mumsnet to take a look at me and these threads. I wish it were fake.

Oh yes, the growling is the best bit!

Wow, just wow

Big hugs, and much and and

” But I think this has become ridiculous now and could easily have been stopped with a determined effort at the beginning!”

With the benefit of hindsight, you are right, @NorthernKnickers - however, I don’t think the OP was wrong to try a more softly-softly approach - I suspect that in the vast majority of cases, just saying “Let’s forget it and move on” (I think that is the gist of what the OP said) would have drawn a line under the whole thing.

The OP was not to know, back then, how Softzilla was going to react.

Glad you had party friend over. Don't feel.any pressure to update until you're ready.

Bless you OP x I’d be a snotty mess too x

Blimey. Can't believe how this has escalated. Hope you're OK.

Oh, I hope it's all OK Unreasonable.

Sending you and good wishes.

And, trollhunters, MNHQ has repeatedly checked OP out and found her genuine. This mad stalking cunt has been pestering OP on and off for months, and this is the way that stalkers behave. It starts off so slow, and so trivial, that you sort of have a laugh about how tiresome the person is, and want to let it go (OP has repeatedly refused to engage with the mad cunt beyond 'There is nothing to discuss, let's drop it and move on' months ago). And when the stalker crosses line after line, you start to realise that it's worth compiling a log of events for when you have to inform the police, or take it to court. I think these threads might be helpful to OP in the long run, too.

Hope you’re ok op x

I hope you're feeling a bit better now what an awful time you've had.

Hope you are ok OP

Take care and Yay for party friend.
Hope the police were helpful

Just what is Softzilla getting out of all this? OP has made it quite clear that she’s done, and just wants to get on with life, but I really don’t understand why SZ just doesn’t let go.

Ok ill try to answer some queries first.
I had let them know about the mumsnet thread and reminded them. They said as long as I am happy to take the risk it could be brought up if it goes to court I can continue however if this goes that way they will ask I stop/ for it to be taken down. Also they wanted the evidence of contact til they had done an initial visit. Now I am free to block her, which I have done. Tho they have shown me a way that I can do this but still get one message a day that basically collates any contact into one message? So no detail just x no. of calls x no. of texts.
The text to me she appears to have been quite brazen about. She asked if she could send a message to her dp to ask him to come home. They believe she messaged me then too.

Is this the one about moving a party an hour so other kids could go as parties overlap ?

All this and the police are still not recommending not to discuss it online?

In reply to "if you'd just blocked her earlier ..." posts. When? Something's a bit annoying, do you block then? Something gets a bit more annoying, but you're all part of a big group and you don't want to create a drama, do you block then and cause the drama? The thing is that by the time you think "enough is enough, I should block" you're already in a situation where you're worried that if you do it might make things worse and escalate the situation and then you get advice not to block, which is the right thing to do by then, i.e. not block.

To people who think that the police wouldn't go round there without going round to OP first. That's the way it happens at least some of the time. A few years back my stepfather's partner, who has serious mental health issues, started calling me with the most horrific abuse, I mean nasty beyond belief. I called him when she wasn't there to let him know what was happening and he said he was sorry and thought I should call the police. I did, they listened to a bit of one recording I had - I'd kept the voice messages - and went round to hers. They told me afterwards what had happened and what would happen if she contacted me again. That was exactly how it happened to what is happening with SZ and the police and OP sounds spot on to me.

Op, I don't know exactly how you feel, but I know a bit of it. I really hope that this brings an end to it all, but know that if it doesn't the police will take it further. I'd also expect the soft play group to kick her out as well.

No not the party one.

No, it isn’t, @SheilaTurnip - there are links to the previous threads upthread.

What a nut job.