Softzilla, the police

[Unreasonableunreasonableness]

I can't update just now but here's the new thread. I will update later when I can.

Any posters who aren’t interested/think OP is to blame (ridiculous imo) just don’t read any more. Why get nippy with OP? She’s posting because some of us do want updates and are supporting her, not attention seeking. Attention seeking would be numerous unanswered posts, which is absolutely not the case here given the sheer number of threads. OP isn’t filling them by herself and only starts new ones when requested.

What conclusion @Cambionome ?

I open it maybe every 3 days when it's still On my "threads I'm on" list. And my mind boggles that so many people are still wanting the op to keep this going and "awaiting updates".

Cross post a bit there. I haven't 'met up to discuss' anything with anyone. I met up with a friend yesterday. I had some worries about that and 'updated' here as people had been giving me great advice so if I'd had a resounding NO DON'T GO I might have changed plans.
When asked how things have been and what I've been doing I told that friend about this pretty major thing that had happened to me. We talked about it for maybe 5 mins. Then she showed me some holiday pics, we did some shopping and had lunch.
This is the first time I have spoken about softzilla in real life since the day after I called the police when I saw group leader. Please remember you only get a snap shot of this part of my life, I'm not filling you in on EVERYTHING else so you don't know how heavily weighted it is.

Teddy are you also getting the "failed to post thing"? I keep getting it even though it clearly has posted. Most annoying

Dammit OP, you know full well that as a bigger gorilla has pissed over your chips you are now meant to never talk to anyone ever again in case they also know SZ. Otherwise you're in the wrong. FFS

The amount of threads on here where people are told to speak face to face with friends to clear up issues, and when someone does it they're apparently a shit stirrer. Not a battle you can win.

Op I don’t think you’re fanning the flames at all. It’s a massive and totally unnerving unusual situation. You have asked here for advice and support. And if we can still help/provide an impartial ear to listen then please post here.

@BitOutOfPractice 👏👏👏👏

Very well said.

You all know you can hide threads you don't like don't you? MN made a button for it. Unless of course not seeing the posts is not your aim.

OP good luck today at your activity. I hope you go early and help set up.

I like the 'updates' as too many people ask for help/advice and never let us know the outcome.

Happy Friday!

SIL friend messaged once when she was on holiday asking if I'd called the police. I sent one text back saying 'yes unfortunately I had no choice' and that was it.
5 mins was too long for the phrase YOU feel was necessary. I wanted to tell my friend a tad bit more, she is quite a close friend after all.
Party mum has done nothing wrong. I said to her that I was meeting up with SIL friend and where in a conversation about what we have planned for the week. Because she is a kind person she anticipated I'd be nervous and said she needed to do some shopping so would do it that time incase I needed anything. No mention of softzilla at all.

OP I like the updates too - not sure why others need to criticise, there are plenty of other threads on this site they can read - hope all goes well today.

Fair enough op. Carry on doing what you're doing and entertaining the people here. But don't kid yourself that you're not enjoying this and that you haven't had a part to play in keeping it alive in RL.

Offended? Where have I said I'm offended?

Gosh theses a lot of people really got over invested in this isn't there. Not happy to hear a dissenting voice.

Oh right ok, it’s AIBU. In which case, wind your neck in. You have presumably read the threads, know that people want to support OP and read updates. If you don’t like that, that’s your problem. Being shitty with OP and sneery about other posters just makes you look a bit ridiculous tbh.
Fuck off, don’t fuck off, I don’t really care. Carry on making a show of yourself if you must. I just can’t understand why it gives you kicks to do that, very strange.

And, quite ironically, it seems you are now very much enjoying this thread being about you. What a hypocrite.

Kicks? Nope. Though it's clearly rattled your cage!

Anyway, off to work now. I've said my piece and I hope the op thinks at least a bit about scaling all this back a bit

Madness. Ignore those two. The story isn't over yet and lots of us are waiting to see how you get on today. It's a pretty major thing that has happened so I'm not surprised the OP has had some rl convos recently about it. No way is she fanning the flame. So anyone who doesn't want to see any updates can just hide the thread and leave it to the rest of us to cheer the OP on.

No one is fanning any flames except Softzilla. Most of the OPs posts have been about things Softzilla has done and to ask advice on what to do.

Ignore the negative posters OP and I hope SZ has seen sense now and stops hassling you.

I think these threads have been useful and important.

Stalking and harassment are serious, harmful and, in fact, criminal.

In this case the stalking behaviour is being carried out by a woman on another woman. But men also perpetrate stalking behaviour against women with often deadly consequences.

This thread is important because it shows that there is nothing the victim can do to change the stalker’s behaviour. So victim blaming is pointless. It shows that these sorts of behaviours should be reported, not pandered to.

All the posters saying that OP should have nipped it in the bud ages ago and is making a mountain out of a molehill are missing the seriousness of the impact of stalking. And are also perpetuating the myth that ‘it’s not that bad’ and is something that can be reasoned out of if only the victim can find the right approach.

That myth is dangerous. The only response to stalking and harassment is to gather evidence, report and block. It is not the victim’s responsibility to stop a crime being committed against them.

why should she scale it back bit?

because you say youve had enough-go away then

How very unpleasant and frankly bonkers you sound Bit. And the other one.