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Original poster

To think she’s faking?

670 replies

Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 14:34

One of my team at work is 14 weeks pregnant. She’s been off sick for 5 weeks with severe hyperemesis and still has a week left on her sick note (she’s being signed off for 2 weeks at a time)

By complete coincidence she is Facebook friends with a friend of mine.

My friend has put some pictures on Facebook this morning of her Greek holiday she’s still on, and my work colleague is in most of them - sunbathing, eating, swimming in the sea, playing volleyball. She has obviously blocked me as she is tagged in the pictures but her name is unclickable.

I’m gonna sound like a complete cow but I think she’s faking her sickness.
She’s on full pay from work and we’re having to pay an agency temp to cover her work too. It’s a small company that is struggling and I doubt we’re going to make any profit this month due to this.

My questions are:

Should I tell/show our boss?
What evidence of hyperemesis does a GP need to see to sign you off or Could it just be on her say so?
Is she actually doing anything illegal?
I know that pregnancy sickness is covered separately to normal in terms of disciplinary but if it’s proven she’s faking could it still be gross misconduct?

Thanks

OP posts:
Puzzledandpissedoff · 27/05/2018 15:22

Retired employer here; I've bent over backwards to help out pregnant staff more times than I care to count, but this would drive me mad - so I'm another who agrees you should hand what you've got to management and leave it with them

I'm surprised the flaming hasn't started yet though, and it's a shame you mentioned the bad effect she could have on the business; round these parts the received wisdom is often that any company unable to lie down and hand staff ... well, whatever they want, really ... isn't fit for purpose Hmm

chocnvino · 27/05/2018 15:25

good point though about double checking that the pics are recent. FB can be misleading and you don't wanna make a fool of yourself!

sonjadog · 27/05/2018 15:25

I think you show them to your boss, and then you leave the question of whether to follow it up or not in her hands.

SimonBridges · 27/05/2018 15:25

Even if she spent every day of the holiday lying in bed she was still taking the piss.
My question would be if she had already booked the holiday and the corresponding time off from work.

How could she persuade the doctor to sign the sick note though. My understanding of HG is that you are super ill, not just a bit nauseous.

SoupDragon · 27/05/2018 15:27

So, she had no leave booked for the holiday and present d her last sicknot on the day of her flight...? No way is this genuine HG!

Namechangedtoscream · 27/05/2018 15:29

Also hyperemesis doesn't miraculously stop at the normal stages morning sickness stops at. I stopped actively throwing up at 23 weeks (I'm 25 now!) But struggle to eat and sustain energy due to severe acid reflux (a symptom of hg).

As others have said it's miserable and cancelling life in general becomes the norm. Hospital admissions become the norm (luckily I've escaped that but a few trips to a&e and near misses due to the wards being full were all that stopped me)

I hate piss takers. Gather your evidence and double check it is correct then take it to the boss

DuchyDuke · 27/05/2018 15:29

hyperemesis can magically clear up at any stage of her pregnancy. I’m guessing if she was signed off by her GP it must have been very, very bad at some point and when she was better she decided to treat herself. She was still signed off sick, she still has a sick note, and I presume if you tell your boss this all you will do is foster resentment and be seen as a gossip ESPECIALLY if this results in a stress sick note later on.

I don’t think you should say anything.

Namechangedtoscream · 27/05/2018 15:30

It can stop at any stage but conveniently for a holiday at the same stage most morning sickness clears up? Really?

HeebieJeebies456 · 27/05/2018 15:31

I know that if it gets to the point that one of us has to be let go, it will probably be me as she’s got more rights and protections being pregnant

All the more reason to tell your boss on monday.
If CF thinks she can play the system and use paid sick leave instead of annual leave to go on her jollies then she can face the consequences of that.

The lying/fraud is gross misconduct and grounds for dismissal in itself.

SoupDragon · 27/05/2018 15:31

I’m guessing if she was signed off by her GP it must have been very, very bad at some point and when she was better she decided to treat herself

She handed the current sick note in on the day of her flight. That’s taking the piss.

SoupDragon · 27/05/2018 15:32

And she must have known she would be well enough to go or the holiday would have been cancelled.

LilacIris · 27/05/2018 15:32

First of all, I would make sure that she has definitely been signed off with severe hyperemesis and not anything else or a combination of pregnancy related things.

Hyperemesis is something some women struggle to get diagnosed and usually involves several trips to hospital for fluids and being on medication. It’s possible that she did have it five weeks ago when she was first signed off and a doctor has since continued signing her off without seeing her. However, if she is being signed off fortnightly and still has a week to go on her current note, then the last one was only issued a week ago and I would think it is incredibly unlikely she would have felt up to travelling (going the hospital is an issue with hyperemesis) so I would struggle to believe she is currently suffering (unless her medication has things under control, in which case she could be back at work) and able to be on holiday.

So whilst pregnancy related sickness is exempt from disciplinary action, it still has to be a genuine sickness to be covered. How you would prove otherwise would be another matter - but ultimately she could be called into a disciplinary meeting and the evidence put to her.

Does your company have occupational health?

MinisterforCheekyFuckery · 27/05/2018 15:34

Just make 100% sure the pics are recent and you haven't got your wires crossed before you show your boss or it could be very embarrassing.

ScattyCharly · 27/05/2018 15:34

This kind of thing really pisses me off. I had HG. I was fucking bed bound. I had a sick bucket with me all of the time so that I didn’t have to move. I was the lightest weight I had been since I was about 11 years old. I couldn’t walk more than about 5 steps without someone helping me. I had to go and live with my mum so she could look after me whilst my dh worked because I couldn’t even look after myself. Even so, people at work though I was faking. I was sick up until and including the day of birth.

I’d screenshot the lot and give to the boss.
Basically though you’re screwed. Trying to allege something at work against a pregnant person is very very hard.

Namechangedtoscream · 27/05/2018 15:34

How did she get insurance? Dehydration is a huge risk with HG nevermind in the Greek heat!

HeebieJeebies456 · 27/05/2018 15:34

i doubt she had HG, more like she thought it was a clever way to get annual leave without losing the actual annual leave she's 'saving' Hmm

Plsadvise · 27/05/2018 15:34

I think in certain situations you need to put yourself first - and if you don't do anything about this and then you end up jobless because the firm is struggling financially you will be kicking yourself that you didn't.

In your position I would ask your boss if they had 10 minutes to discuss something with you privately out of earshot of anyone else / out of the office if necessary.

Then I'd say I appreciate that you can't discuss someone elses sick leave with me, and there might be more to this than meets the eye, but just incase I wanted to show you these. It looks from facebook like the holiday began on x date and is in y place. Here are the photos. I haven't told anyone else at work and I don't intend to.

And then leave it completely in your bosses hands. Even if she decides to do nothing now, it'll mean she's fully informed later if there are likely to be redundancies etc.

Original poster
Appleofmypie · 27/05/2018 15:34

Pics are recent. As I said it’s my friend who’s profile I see the pictures on, but my work colleague is friends with her through their dp’s.
I know for a fact when they went away.

I obviously don’t know what is on her sick note but she told me she was signed off with hyperemesis when she brought the first certificate in.

I’ve emailed my boss and attached the photos.

OP posts:
LilacIris · 27/05/2018 15:37

I would imagine your boss will call her in for a meeting now, unless her sick note covers something else. If she has been signed off for something like prenatal depression, but was embarrassed to say so and told you she had hyperemesis, then be prepared for things to be quite awkward in work.

KickAssAngel · 27/05/2018 15:38

I was signed off for 2 weeks just on my own account of how I felt. But - the doctor could see that I was mildly dehydrated and I couldn't walk fast (or it made me sick) so she saw how I looked. She also gave me pills that stopped me throwing up but didn't stop the nausea so after 2 weeks I went back to work and toughed it out.

However - how can anyone prove this? She could just say that she spent all morning throwing up but was OK in the afternoon. At best I think your employer will tell her that a week of the time should be taken as holiday, as it was clearly pre-booked, but even that could leave her open to a law suit that she can't afford.

FuckPants · 27/05/2018 15:38

Well done for reporting her, it's people like her that fuck it up for the rest of us.

BlueJava · 27/05/2018 15:40

I'd screenshot, show the boss and let him decide what he wants to do.

Icklepickle101 · 27/05/2018 15:40

With HG I was in hospital many many times. A trip to Tesco was draining enough, a forgein holiday would have just not happened even on heavy duty anti sickness

Namechangedtoscream · 27/05/2018 15:42

However - how can anyone prove this? She could just say that she spent all morning throwing up but was OK in the afternoon.

Dry lips, abnormal bp, ketones in the urine which will be very dark, general drained appearance... my lips were visibly split they were so dry. It's difficult to take being that unwell

Namechangedtoscream · 27/05/2018 15:42

Fake not take

Also over time my skin has totally dried out and is cracked and painful