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AIBU?

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To think that if you don't want people to use the N word, don't put it in the lyrics of your songs

301 replies

PatriarchyPersonified · 22/05/2018 14:38

Just that really. Kendrick Lamar invited a fan out of the audience at a recent gig to rap along to the lyrics of one of his songs.

The fan (a white lady) repeatedly used the N word, because it's in the lyrics. He stopped her and told her she couldn't say it. She was also booed and abused by the crowd.

🤔

If you don't want people to say a certain word, then don't put it in the lyrics of your songs.

It's either not acceptable, or it's ok. You can't have it both ways.

I personally don't think the N word is an acceptable word to be used full stop, and that doesn't change based on the race of the person using it.

www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-44209141

OP posts:
summersmith · 22/05/2018 17:44

There are any number of 2 syllable words that woman could have used. I really don’t know what she was thinking. This thread is begging for what would be an incredibly simple flow chart of acceptable use.

Aeroflotgirl · 22/05/2018 17:47

Home2018 wasen't the woman singing his lyrics Confused. If you don't want people to sing them, don't put them in your songs right!

muttmad · 22/05/2018 17:50

In this case the artist was the one in the wrong, this poor lady got invited onto the stage and was asked to sing along, which she did.
He either set her up on purpose or is incredibly stupid. Whilst its an awful word to use, she was singing along as instructed not directing the word at anyone.

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 17:50

*@Aeroflotgirl Tue 22-May-18 17:41:24

I find the words hoes and bitches used by rappers highly offensive.*

Lol so all white people are not one large homogeneous group but all black people and even rappers are?

What is the point in this post?

I find both terms offensive too.

It doesn't mean that I want to use the N word.

This displays something about you!

ImKait · 22/05/2018 17:50

Hey @thor86 you loved a black artist and their music and sang along to their own words. Probably spending a fair bit of money on their music or to see their shows.

You massive racist!

Hmm
GalwayWayfarer · 22/05/2018 17:59

I think the key question is one we probably won't know the answer to - was he hoping she would use the wrong word so he could publicly humiliate her,

I think we can safely assume this option was not the intention, given KL's credentials. It's not something he would do.

Do you not think there is a possibility that he did 'use his forms of privilege against her

I thought about this when I wrote that comment. My view is that he didn't. He was sharing his power by inviting her to participate in an experience that any fan would find meaningful and which only he could enable. I can see why KL would feel betrayed that in the face of that sharing, she so willingly and thoughtlessly used the n word.

Had KL financially or physically coerced her in any way, it would be an abuse of privilege. Had he mocked her for being a woman or pressured her in some way it would have been an abuse of privilege. But he didn't. He invited her to share an experience, and then called her out when she participated in a way which is near-universally deemed unacceptable.

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 18:03

And, are we considering the offence caused to billion or so other black people that didn't make the song and that may also not agree with the use of the N-word?

They may also agree that they don't think rappers should use it.

But, they will also agree that that word received from a white person will be different. I.e. you could literally be talking to someone that sees you less than human because you are black. Just like intended on the invention of the word.

How are we just happily skipping through history?

HOW DO YOU THINK IT FEELS TO BE AT THE END OF THAT WORD?

Why would you as a non-racist (so you say) want to inflict that on someone because some rapper that you call stupid in the same breath also uses it?

Black people are not one, and no one gave him the right to use it. In that same breath, him using it does not give you the right to use it and therefore cause offence to all the other black people in the world.

I still don't get why people would WANT to use it and nobody has explained it to me.

With all the knowledge that has been shared so far in this thread, I'm confident in saying anyone still defending their right to use the term is either racist or more interested in protecting their white privilege then understanding how their actions hurt, demean and offend another group, and I'm in no rush to explore whether the latter doesn't equal racisim in itself.

UserV · 22/05/2018 18:04

Double standards of the highest order.

ReanimatedSGB · 22/05/2018 18:07

GalwayWayfarer - fair enough. I don't know very much about him (I'm in my 50s and rap/hip hop music is a genre I don't know a lot about in general).
FWIW I think the woman shouldn't have used the word, but I can see how she made that error, and I very much doubt it was done maliciously (if she was actively racist, she probably wouldn't have a) paid to go and see him and b) know all the words to his songs.)

wendiwoowho · 22/05/2018 18:08

Words don't offend me, however how they are used do.

This lady standing up singing along to a songs lyrics I would say is clear she didn't mean any offence. She wasn't directing that particular word towards anyone. She wasn't using the word in a derogatory manner.

GalwayWayfarer · 22/05/2018 18:08

Double standards of the highest order.

The entire history of world wide race relations is a double standard and one of a slightly higher order than this.

Aeroflotgirl · 22/05/2018 18:10

What do you mean Home, displays something about me, what might that be then!

ImKait · 22/05/2018 18:11

So it comes back to she can't sing it because she's a white woman.

So my original question stands - at what skin tone does it become acceptable? At what point would she have been "black enough"?

As to why she wanted to sing it? Because it's the lyrics to a song she presumably likes by an artist she presumably admires!

thor86 · 22/05/2018 18:13

@Home2018

I've given you a reason why I might need to use it (which is not necessarily the same as want to, true), to avoid censoring a quote. Equally if I'm singing a song and it is part of the lyrics I'll sing it because it is part of the lyrics.

Everyone has a right to be offended by a word, but that doesn't give you the right to decide no one (or only certain people) can use it.

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 18:13

How are we just happily skipping through history?

HOW DO YOU THINK IT FEELS TO BE AT THE END OF THAT WORD?

Why would you as a non-racist (so you say) want to inflict that on someone because some rapper that you call stupid in the same breath also uses it?

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 18:15

*@thor86

Equally if I'm singing a song and it is part of the lyrics I'll sing it because it is part of the lyrics.

Everyone has a right to be offended by a word, but that doesn't give you the right to decide no one (or only certain people) can use it.*

Yep, just as it gives me the right to call anyone that wants to use it a racist. Do sing it out loud in public won't you. It's always better to know who people really are!

Moonkissedlegs · 22/05/2018 18:18

If he didn't want a white woman singing that word from his song, then he shouldn't have invited a white woman up on stage to sing the song with him.

Its not that hard.

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 18:19

There is some real racism and stupidity on display here. I'm out for my own mental health.

@VauxhallVectra @GalwayWayfarer see you at the pub, this crap is driving me to want to drink on a weekday!

thor86 · 22/05/2018 18:19

@Home2018

You do have the right to use the word racist, though in this context I'd be inclined to think you lose that right to use it in reference to me as you're being libelous.

Aeroflotgirl · 22/05/2018 18:20

Home2018 I do agree with you on that one, I listen to Eminem, if I am singing along at home minus kids, I do sing the swearing bits to, its party of the lyrics. He asked her to sing along to his songs, which she did.

strixowl · 22/05/2018 18:21

I'll use the N word if in listening to rap or hip-hop when I'm alone. Never in public.

But yeah, if Kendrick had a problem with a white woman rapping the lyrics to his song then he should have invited a POC up there instead Hmm

strixowl · 22/05/2018 18:24

Have to admit I wouldn't have felt comfortable singing like she did that word in front of all those people. She could have said "jigga" "hitta" "brother" anything...

Home2018 · 22/05/2018 18:24

thor86 Tue 22-May-18 18:19:31

@Home2018

You do have the right to use the word racist, though in this context I'd be inclined to think you lose that right to use it in reference to me as you're being libelous.

Ha ha ha, look at this shit right here. You get to sing N because some random rapper gave you the right, but I don't get to call you a racist because it's libellous.

You have made me so sure that all of my assumptions about you are correct.

I am definitely out, you've just let me leave on a morally superior high.

I will literally remember the stupidity in this comment forever. Thank you! Wink

thor86 · 22/05/2018 18:27

@Home2018

Where did I say a rapper gave me the right? What I actually said was I don't need your permission. I also don't need a rappers permission and he doesn't need mine.

And yes it is libelous to call me a racist. As it happens I'm not bothered, even though you're wrong, so it's fine.

BoneyBackJefferson · 22/05/2018 18:33

GalwayWayfarer

It would be equally wrong for him to use his forms of privilege against her, but that isn't what happened in this situation

Seems to me that he did use his forms of privilege against her, more so as he had the power in the room.

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