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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that RF looked disinterested?

370 replies

Wellthisisawkwardnow · 19/05/2018 16:44

When the couple were making their vows - heads firmly in programmes

OP posts:
Doyoumind · 19/05/2018 22:26

To be fair, when I'm at a wedding I often have to look away or look down so I don't cry. And with the heightened emotions of the day, I can also understand why it was possible they were sniggering. It doesn't look great, but they're human and sometimes being under the spotlight makes you do things you shouldn't.

DadDadDad · 19/05/2018 22:39

I think it's a bit uneducated to call it a misuse, given it's widespread and accepted, and the first dozen or so posters on this thread didn't appear to have a problem understanding it.

millymae · 19/05/2018 22:45

I think a lot of you need to get to Specsavers! I’ve just watched the news with the edited highlights and the Royals didn’t look disinterested when the vows were being said to me.
I had half an eye on the church service live and one of my children did comment that he thought the granny ( the Queen) was a bit rude because when she arrived in church and walked past Harry and William she didn’t even say hello.
FWIW I thought Megan looked lovely, as did the Queen, the brides mum and Camilla although perhaps her hat was a little on the large side. Even Prince Charles looked as though he made an effort.

scaryteacher · 19/05/2018 22:55

I think it's intrusive to gaze during the vows; it's a very personal moment. Bad enough having the camera's there, let alone the eyes of the entire congregation boring into you. The RF could also have been emotional....Harry finally getting what he's wanted.

BurberryIsSo2000 · 19/05/2018 23:00

Did anyone else see, just before they all went outside, Kate looking incredibly Hmm and disapproving of the whole thing?

She looked rather pissed off, like a disapproving mother in law or something Grin

Itscurtainsforyou · 19/05/2018 23:06

Harry was blinking a lot during the ring exchange. I'm trying to work out if it was to stop him getting emotional or because he just felt so awkward with the whole thing. Getting married can be quite nerve wracking let alone on tv with millions watching.

MissEliza · 20/05/2018 00:17

Charles and Wills looked really happy for Harry. Everyone else looked a bit subdued. No actually the D of E was beaming.

Mummyoflittledragon · 20/05/2018 05:20

Burberry
Or maybe just 4 weeks post partum, exhausted and pissed off her bil decided to marry within 4 weeks of her due date. I was bloody shocked about that one. Let alone this poor woman.

Mummyoflittledragon · 20/05/2018 05:25

millymae
I watched the YouTube of the queen arriving at William and Kate’s marriage. She did pretty much the same thing. Walked past almost without smiling. We forget she’s an old lady, she must be steeling herself for the gruelling day ahead. Speaking as a chronically ill person, doing as little as possible including not addressing everyone is energy conservation.

PlumsGalore · 20/05/2018 05:59

So, anyone know where I can watch the full thing on replay? I only watch five minutes, wish I had been more interested now.

AndhowcouldIeverrefuse · 20/05/2018 06:06

curtains I thought he might have been sweating - hot day, warm clothes, nerves.

Mummyoflittledragon · 20/05/2018 06:12

PlumsGalore
It’s probably on sky somewhere. I watched it on sky news yesterday. Otherwise it’s on YouTube. m.youtube.com/watch?v=N42MQJX4KoY

QueenofmyPrinces · 20/05/2018 06:46

I watch it on BBC iPlayer last night and found the whole preacher section very strange - it looked like even Harry and Meghan were stifling giggles.

There was one moment when the camera focused on Zara Phillips and the look on her face was priceless!!! It really was a “Who the hell is this man and WTAF is he on about?!” expression. It was brilliant.

The more I saw of Meghan though the more beautiful I thought she looked.

shouldwestayorshouldwego · 20/05/2018 06:52

AIBU to not be looking forward to BIL wedding? I have a three week old bf baby and although I have someone I can leave him with he is not allowed in the service. I will have to be away from him for a few hours. My older dc are part of the wedding party and they are only little so a bit worried they might misbehave. I am also shattered getting used to having three children. I will go but I am not looking forward to it and worried about what people will think of me.

Even a nest of vipers would surely find it hard to turn on that AIBU. Give Kate a break. Yes she has help but she is still juggling the very different demands of three children. Sitting down for that time without baby and I am surprised she didn't fall asleep.

Mummyoflittledragon · 20/05/2018 07:04

Burberry
I forgot to add, maybe Kate’s boobs were hurting. A lot. Dd was ebf and I took a bottle out with me (first time I did this as a trial) because we were out and about and knew I’d have to stop to feed her and didn’t want to. By the time I got back, I had developed a series of bright purple stretch marks and my boobs were on fire. Dd was 6 weeks old.

BurberryIsSo2000 · 20/05/2018 07:17

Mummy That sounds bloody awful! I'm very lucky, my DS is EBF and has always gone 4/5 hours between feeds so I often forget a lot of people would be bursting Blush

HasAnyoneGotAProblemWithThat · 20/05/2018 07:32

I often look at the order of service as that helps me not to cry during the vows. I think it’s a very personal moment & to me always feels intrusive to watch.

Charles was watching from what I saw. As was Camilla. Kate looked beautiful but unsurprisingly tired to me. PP looked chuffed to bits but looked like he had a black eye. Anyone else notice?

DinosApple · 20/05/2018 07:34

I saw Charles, William and Phillip watching the vows. The cameras weren't facing that side all the time and presumably the rest looked up occasionally when not in shot.

Kate had a baby 3 weeks ago.
She's 3w pp. Emotional, leaky boobs, lochia, sore sat on a hard pew. And millions watching.

And if she'd shed a tear the cameras would have picked it up and made it into something it wasn't. She wore a big hat and kept her head down. Fair play.

GnotherGnu · 20/05/2018 07:35

I was more surprised that the Queen didn't appear to crack a smile at all.

You can't have been looking, there were plenty of smiles. It's not surprising if she takes a church service seriously, however.

GnotherGnu · 20/05/2018 07:39

Did anyone else see, just before they all went outside, Kate looking incredibly hmm and disapproving of the whole thing?

FFS, one fleeting look and you put layers of interpretation onto it. She was probably registering discomfort from her breasts or wondering what George and Charlotte were getting up to, or something.

CasperGutman · 20/05/2018 07:49

In a chapel setup like that, where the congregation face inwards towards one another, it is natural that they look down and inwards, or that their gaze wanders around a bit. Staring off towards the altar at an angle is uncomfortable, and looking straight ahead at the people opposite is awkward.

Even the TV cameras were looking around at the congregation (otherwise we wouldn't know where anyone was looking) so it can't have been that inappropriate to look away from the happy couple!

RoadToRivendell · 20/05/2018 07:51

I thought they showed pretty admirable restraint during the fire and brimstone segment.

Weddings are pretty dull, I don't know what you'd have expected them to do.

I'm sure Kate's mind was on her boobs.

waitingforwombat · 20/05/2018 07:55

Of course it was appropriate to laugh and smile during the sermon. The preacher was laughing and joking. He was trying to be engaging and amusing "let's get y'all married".

In a religious wedding, the solemn moment of a wedding is the marriage, when the royal family were appropriately sombre and sitting with heads bowed etc (couple making deeply personal, solemn, covenant, promises in the sight of God). The sermon is then an address to the couple and the congregation, its a "speech", and completely appropriate to laugh, smile, respond. And 17 minutes? For a sermon, in a church, with the ABC and Queen present.... Absolutely fine! It is a religious ceremony after all.

Feel like people just desperate to find fault. RF look solemn and they are "not interested", RF smile and laugh and they look "disrespectful". Also, if you are sitting in the choir stalls on the same side as the bride and groom you can probably see precisely nothing of them. So guests might have been listening intently, but pretty hard to gaze at them adoringly!

InkSnail · 20/05/2018 08:01

I thought the smirking was very rude. Obviously the sermon was different to the usual royal event here, but surely you respect the couple's choice of speaker and listen politely. How nasty to laugh at someone chosen by the bride and groom, to bring a different tradition into the event. They knew they were on live TV too. How will the couple feel when they see that on the coverage? I was disappointed to see Charles chatting during the performance of the amazing 19 year old cellist too.

ladymariner · 20/05/2018 08:01

Well I think some of you lot must have been watching a different wedding to the rest of us, I thought it was a wonderful day. Perhaps if you stopped looking for imaginary things to find fault with, you would enjoy life more!
Be like George Clooney, now there's someone who knows how to enjoy life Grin