carrot I know. I've been there. It's so unfair isn't it? 
Food ( &
) has been my comfort throughout many difficult and challenging times of my life. I just could NOT see how I would let it go! Plus I had a sweet tooth. How else would I treat myself?
Thing is. My life was now out of my hands. I searched for and waited years for a magic wand. To get me out of bed. To get me out of a wheelchair. To get me out of the house. To make me fit into my clothes again. etc. I think I was in a spiral of misery (& poss self-pity)
At rock bottom, I had to start with Acceptance of this life and looking at the things I could change. I could not stand up, leave the house, get back to work etc but I COULD be kind to my body on the inside and treat it well. Eating daily chocolate, a packet of biscuits or crisps was empty calories and not helping my nutrition, waistline, teeth or self-esteem. I mean I was fat now too
.
Taking control of my nutrition meant I felt more confident I could influence some things at least. When the weight started dropping off, I was doing this myself! At last. After years or promising. It gave me such a boost. If I could manage this, what else could I improve? By myself!
I have never had any willpower and I expected to fail. BUT once you get past 2 weeks and your taste buds change it is unlikely you will miss it. I've lost the taste for 'tasty stuff' now. I just see long lists of ingredients of god knows what. My health & energy has even improved. Who'd have thought 
But, I do cheat. I still reward myself with food in a way. I always have a cup of tea in the afternoon with a little dark chocolate! Yum. Used to hate it, now love it. (Had a small Cadbury's easter egg back in April and it was sickly, cloying, over-sweet and stuck all over the inside of my mouth. Bleurgh.)
I'm sorry you're feeling so low carrot. It won't always feel like this. Look ahead. YOU can do this too. I agree with pp's. It helps if you have companionship and support whilst life is dealing you a crock of shit
. Are there any support groups in the same situation as you? Either local or online. Sharing the shit stuff with someone who gets it is very therapeutic!
Wishing you all the best 