About elderly neighbours and my daughter’s piano

[user1499173618]

My DD is practising for her Grade 4 piano exam, which is due to take in June. We live on the second floor of a very nice apartment building of six apartments. We are the only occupants with a school aged child living at home. DD is very quiet and polite.

Our neighbours on the fourth and fifth floors have complained about DD’s piano playing and asked whether she could wear a headset and use the electronic keyboard. While I understand that they would prefer not to hear the piano at all, DD only plays for 30’ or so a day, apart from on Friday afternoons when her piano teacher gives her an hour’s lesson.

TBH I am quite hurt! DD is beautifully behaved and we work hard to keep her usefully occupied. I would have appreciated a more supportive set of neighbours! AIBU?

I'm jealous. I'd love to experience this in the allotted time. I'd love to gauge the improvement over time. I lived for a few days in an apartment in Venice. Two of the residents practised alto-sax and something else nightly. I loved it? But that's just me. Lots think I'm weird.

OTOH, noise that grates me, others don't have issues with it.

I will move in with you and play my collection of death metal. They will soon be pleading for the piano!

Wow, I’d find somewhere else to live if I were you. I’m 58 and would hate to have that noise for 30 minutes a day plus an hour a week. It’s hardly fair on your daughter that she’s made to be “quiet and beautifully behaved” all the time, she should be able to tear about and shout, be a child!

Personally I don't think it's unreasonable for your daughter to practice her piano playing for the times you have suggested.
You ate very lucky you don't live below my upstairs (bitch of a) neighbour who thinks she owns the block & complained the other other day about me shutting my kitchen door! Yep, shutting the door! Not slamming or banging, just normal run of the mill shutting. She fucking batshit 😡

A piece of hardboard with egg boxes glued all over it, placed in the way of the fireplace will help.....just try it.

Egg boxes will do nothing whatsoever to contribute to soundproofing, and are also a fire hazard when used in this way. Please don't do this.

Would a Chimney balloon work? You would need to check safety!

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B018QRWM90/ref=mpsa15?ie=UTF8&qid=1526664659&sr=8-5&pi=ACSX236SY340_QL65&keywords=chimney+balloon&dpPl=1&dpID=41nzcWZO6QL&ref=plSrch

1. Try blocking up the chimney with something soundproofing, so more than just a board.
2. Give your neighbours some gift wrapped earplugs.

It isn't anti social to play piano, actually I would say it was antisocial to complain about a child in your community learning an instrument. Apartment or terrace living requires mutual respect and tolerance on all sides, not silence!

YANBU This ^^

Can’t believe all these miserable toads who can’t bear a bit of piano practice. I hope I never become so curmudgeonly.

Next-door-neighbours complained about the next road’s afternoon jubilee street party a few years back (loud laughter apparently) and also threatened to call the police about ds’s party. This party was a Star Wars party for an 8-year-old. Also they have actually called the police about “anti-social behaviour” in the mornings, which turned out to be kids chatting on the way to school. They said the talking disturbed their breakfast. Some people should move to Alaska. And get some real problems.

We used to live in an expensive apartment in Birmingham's City Centre. They were new builds, with very thin walls. You have to laugh when you pay £1400 a month to live in shoebox with cardboard thin walls.

Anyway, I was also practicing for my Grade 5. I usually practice at my mums who has a detatched house but she was on holiday. I had to practice at home with an electronic.

Within 10 minutes I had 3 people ask if I could turn it down. One lived 2 floors up. I wasn't convinced they could actually hear it that far up so I went upstairs and took a listen (neighbour invited me). It was audible.

I know it's a bit of inconvenience but I'd advise using the headphones.

Think about it from your own point of view. If you're like me you can tolerate the neighbours having the odd loud party, movie night or gaming night. But what I couldn't tolerate is repetitive noise daily. Most people are the same.

I since relocated to a semi and have a music room on the opposite end of the house. Neighbours can't hear a thing through our thick walls.

I will move in with you and play my collection of death metal. They will soon be pleading for the piano!

You can borrow my son too, he's learning bagpipes!

YANBU & good luck to your dd for her exam

I don’t live in a shoebox with cardboard walls! It’s a VERY solid Victorian era building, one apartment per floor and very spacious apartments.

I,would offer to make sure it is not more than an hour a day on weekdays and no more than two at weekends and not after 9pm at night. . If she continues to play to a reasonably high standard that level of practice (and more) will be needed and might make them realise they are getting off lightly at the moment.

Also (in a genuine attempt to compromise) I might ask if there are days/times when they will be out? If they could give you some notice of those times you could offer to fit some of her practice into those windows.

But really they ABU. 30 minutes music practice a day is perfectly reasonable and noise is part and parcel of apartment living.

My old neighbours had drums. At 2am on a Tuesday!!! Also most of the day and evening. Never answered the door (turns out they already had a noise abatement order from previous renters). Quiet area apart from them! It was hell.

Two floors up is pretty loud to be honest, especially as elderly people generally have hearing trouble. I would speak to them and ask if there are times you can agree on.

What is the relevance of your neighbours' age, OP?

Please fill us in on further descriptive colour, like the colour of their curtains, their race, the name of their dog, what supermarket they like to shop at etc etc

Given the time and duration of practice you and your DD are not being unreasonable at all. All noise is fair game up until 10pm.

"I don’t live in a shoebox with cardboard walls! It’s a VERY solid Victorian era building, one apartment per floor and very spacious apartments."

Oh in that case your neighbours are probably being picky and I wouldn't even worry about it. The Victorian buildings I've lived in have all had very thick walls. You're right, much different to the cardboard thin walls. In which case I honestly wouldn't even worry. An hour a day practicing at a reasonable hour isn't a nosey/nuisance neighbour imho.

Good luck on her exam :)

Your neighbours are assholes
If it’s not between the noise abatement hours of 11pm to 7am there is nothing they can do thoguh I’d say 9pm is a polite time to be quiet during the week .
Tell them to get knotted and that your daughter isn’t messing up her music practice to suit them !
Nosie from tv music kids playing excerising etc is to be expected during days and early evenings and if they don’t like it jsut ignore them

Also as she progresses half an hour won’t be enoguh and it will be longer and that’s totally fine and normal to do in your apartment .
Honestly don’t compromise or apologise or they will likely jsut moan more in future . You need to make it clear they are out of line and you won’t listen to their complaints

A house I used to rent had music teachers move in next door. All day, every day we had to endure very badly played piano, violin, flute, and a 3 piece rock band on s Thursday afternoon. It was about 12 hours per day 6 days per week. Even their own playing that was quite good drove me insane in the end (I work from home). My partner thought I was being overly dramatic until he wfh one day 😂. I know what noise nuisance is and what your daughter is doing, definitely is not. I play brass and woodwind myself and my DD is learning a brass instrument at school so I do believe that I'm more tolerant than most.

You could look at ways of dampening the noise of the piano as it does travel tremendously through chimney breasts. Make sure it's on top of a rug and drape a heavy blanket over the back.

Not at all selfish, we are all entitled to make reasonable noise, at reasonable times in our communities. Our house is detached and we regularly hear a neighbour drumming for hours at a time. It’s always during daytime, and they’re entitled to reasonable enjoyment of their home; we wouldn’t dream of complaining even thought it’s not enjoyable.

Noise travelling up two floors! Is the flat above you empty by chance thus the noise is just going straight up. Or there is a definite lack of soundproofing in the building. As there is an alternative to the piano noise ie keyboard with headphones think I would say that the noise is a nuisance. Son went up to grade 7 on keyboard with no problem and no complaints from neighbours.

YANBU -- I think your neighbours are the unreasonable ones. Piano practicing is hardly 'noise' and if it really bothers them, I imagine other neighbours' noise and street sounds bother them too. It sounds like they are being very petty and should consider moving it they are bothered by other peoples' noise. It sounds like you are already being thoughtful and considerate. They need to be less selfish, expecting neighbours to make no noise.

Another YANBU. No harm in investigating some further options for soundproofing, acoustic matting on the floor might help. Not expensive, might change the tone of the piano though?

This is genuinely part of living in flats though. Being tolerant of people going about their daily lives is a good thing. I'd imagine most people watch TV for more than 30 mins a day, can't imagine anyone suggesting wearing headphones for that!

Might be worth at least suggesting (and giving your neighbours a small break to be neighbourly) asking that you have the lesson at your piano teachers instead of yours. For what its worth, our piano teacher teaches on an electric piano so they must be suitable for learning on. (Plus our teacher has never once said that we have to let her have an audience all the time, thank god