Do I call the police about my neighbour

[MrsCrabbyTree]

An elderly neighbour has dented my letterbox on purpose and I am not happy.

Background: Monday morning neighbour's dog rushed into my front yard to chase my cat. Luckily the cat managed to get by the screen door and I grabbed the dog by the collar. Neighbour yelled at me, I asked him to go home, then turned to go inside. He then hit me on the back of the head with the stick he carries while walking his dog. I am fine but it did hurt somewhat.

Young neighbour from across the road saw what occurred and backed up this to the police. Police visited old neighbour and told him that he was fortunate that I did not want to press charges and to behave himself.

There are gates across the driveway, which are never closed, but I decided that it was prudent to do so. Tuesday morning the gate was untethered and slightly open. So I tied a tighter knot in the rope thinking the wind blew them open.

Then this morning I saw the neighbour try to untie the rope and then whacked my letterbox lid with that stick leaving a dent in the metal.

I am really pissed off and so deciding whether or not to complain to the police again. One part of me says to leave it and the pissed off side of me doesn't want him to get away with it?

If it's not too late to report the initial assault, please do so. No one should get away with physical assault and verbal abuse.

Hope you get it sorted @MrsCrabbyTree - what a horrible man.

Throw a boomerang at the old codger

Yes! Ambush him!

I can see your point. I was trying to lighten the mood. 😂

Well, Gidday again Mumsnetters. So impressed with all your detective skills trying to figure out which country I live in

Everybody needs good neighbours then?

I don’t know how the law works over there although usually it’s similat to the UK albeit they may be a bit more laid back than us with all the crime recording statistics nonsense we have to abide by

May it be worth calling the officer who dealt with the original allegation and getting their opinion on a way forward?

Never turn your back on this fellow again. Look at the dent - if he raps you again that could be your head. Nasty, nasty man. I would protect myself by getting one of those internet doorbell things at the very least. Truthfully, I would be more likely to invest in a camera covering front yard including the gates. Chaps like this like will never recognise that any fault lies with them. A visual log is your friend if he decides to become an annoyance in teeny tiny ways. These arses get their jollies by engaging and upsetting others. You need to have incontrovertible proof - or it descends into ‘he said, she said” . Tech. up on this tosser !

Throw a boomerang at the old codger

‘With a little understanding, you can build a brighter day’ (or something)

Do let the police know that he's damaged your property because he couldn't open your gate. I know it's a faff but it's likely he is suffering from dementia, which can make people very aggressive. We had to hide the knives when my grandmother came to visit, and our elderly neighbour hit my mum with her car (deliberately drove at her), after hacking our garden tree to pieces, then came at me with the hedgetrimmers. Her dog always used to run loose in her garden, and she actually cut a hole in the fence for it to get through and chase our hens and rabbits. She also used to leave posters of nasty messages up in her garden. Definitely unhinged.

You don't have to press charges but you can ring 101 and have this new information added to the same incident number. There is then a record if it escalates further. Keep a diary too, you don't need to write in a diary, a notebook will do, just record date/time/what happened/how you felt.

Sorry just read the rest and you're not in UK so forget the first bit but the diary part could still be useful.

I would’nt go back to the police but get a security camera for the front door. Any abuse, trespassing or damage from him would therefore be recorded.

I would go back to the police before he continues to escalate. Tell them that in the light of this morning's events, you do wish to press charges. Otherwise, he will carry on.

I'm happy to pop round ( give me 26hrs for the flights) and stand Dirty Harry style at your gate or even Croc Dundee 😁🗡

I agree with PPs saying you should report this second incident, because your neighbour sounds like he's capable of causing you serious harm. I'm also thinking it could be dementia and it might be worth alerting the relevant services. (It would be Social Services in the UK, I don't know about Down Under obviously.)

The two most likely causes of his behaviour are that he's either a nasty, bullying, dangerous bastard and always has been, or he has some form of dementia. If it's the bastard scenario then you'll be doing to world (or at least the neighbourhood and their cats) a favour by pressing charges, if it's the dementia option then there's a good chance that you will be doing him a favour by pressing charges. He could easily progress to the stage where he is a danger to himself if he has dementia, and especially if he doesn't have family around to act in his best interests it would be better to have a diagnosis and for it to come to the attention of an outside agency.

There are some odd and frankly unpleasant people around. Neighbour disputes can escalate and I think you are right in your thinking. This needs damage limitation as I don't think a reasonable conversation is going to happen. you have two choices to manage it. One is to disarm him by being persistently pleasant as if nothing has happened. The other is to be as low profile for your own comfort and that of your cat. It is not unreasonable to keep your gates shut, and he certainly shouldn't open them, if only to keep the dog off your property and the cat safe. He may have mental health problems, or just be nasty. Either way not worth antagonising him. If the gate is always shut he will get used to it.Don't risk another assault or property damage
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Everyone, thank you for your responses, advice, funny quips and sharing of similar experiences. Sorry that some of you have had awful experiences too.

Late this afternoon I visited a lady from around the corner who has lived in the street for many years. My Nasty Neighbour (NN) has a mean temper. He used beat his wife and two sons. Wife died 15 years ago and the sons will not visit. She said that NN will not like me since I called the police on him and to keep out of his way. Great !!

I think it is wise to go to the police to log the letterbox incident and have phoned to find out the next shift of the officer who came out on Monday. At this stage I wont press charges (unless the officer convinces me otherwise). I don't want to chance any retaliation - just want to be off his radar now.

For the time being there will be a lock on the gates and I will try to remember to watch out for NN at walking time and also have camera on the ready. If all is quiet after a week then I will leave the gates open and see what he does then.

A friend's husband installs security systems and I plan to ask him about a camera to cover the gate, driveway and letterbox. My car is always parked inside a locked garage, day and night.

And of course, my cat will not be putting her whiskers past the front door anymore.

You sound like you've got a complete handle on the situation, OP. Good luck!

God, what a dangerous, violent arsehole. So sorry you're having to put up with this. Horrible. xx

Yes, please report it. Report everything. The police should not make you feel like you are wasting their time.

This record of events, however minor, will be invaluable if things don't stop.

I have recently been assaulted by my mad elderly neighbour over her stealing my daughter's cat repeatedly over a 2-3 year period. It has been awful, she was incredibly violent, luckily I am ok. Plus I had part of it filmed on my phone so the police are handling it now.

There seems to be a lot of it about

But the fact that I have reported her on several occasions over the years has helped the police with this new issue of assault.

That all sounds like the right thing to do. Good idea to get the same police officer you had before, and just get the letterbox thing logged.

If you don't fancy the whole camera thing, perhaps your friend's husband can sell you a big sign saying "CCTV" or something! But if you can afford it, I think CCTV is always a good move and might help bring your insurance down (don't tell them about NN!). Just remember, CCTV won't stop him going after you, so watch out. It sounds like he's always been this way, so the police might already know all about him.
Good luck!

Think of it this way OP, the man is clearly unhinged and its likely you're not the only person he has harassed. You'll potentially be saving someone a whack on the head in the future by sorting it now.

I'm all set for tomorrow morning then. Big dog, CCTV and an AK-47.... I'm no pushover!