To wonder why people only do their own washing?

[sweeneytoddsrazor]

Just that really.

I see so many posts where people say DP's or any child over the age of about 12 do their own washing. Surely it's easier to just empty the laundry basket and do one wash of everyones washing rather than have 4 people do 4 washes with not much in it.

@Gonegirlfriday

I really wouldn't worry about your DS. I don't think teenagers washing their own clothes exists outside this thread and some posters' imaginations.

@Gwenhwyfar I’m baffled as to why some people cant grasp this doesn’t use more water or electric either!

And how one person who does all the washing can argue everyone doing it separately is more time consuming for them is also beyond me! I suspect it’s because they wouldn’t be able to trust their teens to do it to their standard and would spend more time hovering over them than it would take to do it themselves, but I may be wrong.

I never forget how useless I felt going to uni without even knowing how to operate a washing machine (sounds silly I know).

My dm was the type of woman who wouldn't ALLOW anybody else to do the laundry as she felt we'd not be able to do it properly/it was her job/it would be mayhem if others did it.

She followed on from her dm who wouldn't let my grandfather even boil an egg telling him that the kitchen was her domain and he wasn't to enter as he would only muck things up or break things!

So when my grandmother got ill my grandfather didn't even know how to cook for himself. How disempowering is that!

Suffice to say I never want my dc to feel so incompetent, useless and disempowered!

My 11 year old ds is very proud of his appearance and that extends to ironing his own uniform and doing his own laundry. As we have a compact washing machine in the bathroom it is very practical, economical and easy even for a child to use . Everybody helps each other out by washing, hanging out or folding and putting away.

Calling life skills 'chores' has a negative connotation. We call household 'chores' teamwork in our home and everybody helps each other out so that it is not all lumbered on one person.

It also gives an appreciation of how the home runs so that no one gets treated like a doormat or is taken for granted.

Win win

I never forget how useless I felt going to uni without even knowing how to operate a washing machine

Serioulsy?

How long does it take to learn how to use a washing machine?

You got into university but the complexities of a washing machine edluded you??

Jesus wept.

How fucking complicated are washing machines?

Am I missing something?

They all work in a similar way- clothes in, powder in, press go.

And everyone has to read the instruction manual with a new machine anyway, controls are different with each one, so we are all in the same boat ultimately.

Err no, it was an old fashioned one (many years ago) and unfortunately left my clothes ripped to shreds and didn't seem to have a button for temperature so everything shrunk .

Washed everything by hand after that

Call, it's not true teeangers never do their own washing. For example I have two away at university and they are definitely doing their own washing there for example. When they were home and younger one had special shirts he wanted washed in ways I could not be bothered with and he did those. Before that my teenage daughter who is very good with clothes and likes to keep them nice (not my speciality) decided the only way to protect them from the cleaner's bleach and my poor washing skills was to take over washing all her own clothes.

It seems to depend on how you store your dirty washing! We on't have bedroom laundry hampers, we have laundry baskets in the utility room (pull-out ones inside a row of cupboards). One for whites, one for delicates, two for darks, one for towels. Laundry all gets put in there. I put on the washes and DH usually hangs out. Kids still little, so may change in time. Works well, I don't like hampers in bedrooms.

@speakout as one who had to direct lots of 18 year old boys into how to use washing machine at university as a similarly aged girl some people think it's complicated if they have never done it before.

As teenagers all my siblings and I did our own washing and ironing. My siblings then followed this with their own children who are now adults. It was amusing to go round to their houses and see my 13/14 year old proudly ironing their own clothes plus frequently offering to iron a top for their mother if she was working on the weekend.

Household chores are life skills and not learning them until you leave home - like the boys above didn't - means those you share with end up disliking you.

@Gwenhwyfar it might mean more washes if people are only putting half a load on - and don't you separate things out? I do, jeans only go in with other jeans, wool jumpers go in together on a wool wash, some things need to go in on a hand wash and so on.

I still don't understand how people can be so dense! It's not more piles nor water FFS!
5 people in a house. You either have 5 loads mixed people or 5 loads per person. The number of loads of washing doesn't change. It doesn't use any more water as each person has a full load

Ok humour me. You have five individuals in the house capable of their own washing. I’m assuming some are teenagers. My teen DS does PE three times a week and an extra sport 2/3 times a week. If he washed his own load once a week I’d have to buy six lots of sports kit, instead I get away with three. So I save money on sport kit and only wash 4 times a week for the whole household. I also get away with 3 school polos instead of 5.

What happens when your teen wants to wear their favourite T-shirt more than once in 7 days? Do they have to go round the household finding the next person who is due to “do their wash” and ask nicely?

Do the five washes never clash? What happens if one wants to wash and another got there first. Do they also run a drying programme which would take up the washer for 3 hours at least? I wash on days when the weather is good, or allocate a wash a day so I don’t have the cost of running a dryer. All because we combine our washes and space them out. My DS still puts his stuff in the laundry basket and puts away both our things so the task is shared.

Please yes that's my thinking. I'm not dense but my son only has three school jumpers, one outdoor and one indoor pe top and one pair of shorts between both kits, two pairs of school trousers. So just for him alone to do his own washing would mean a massive spend on kit and uniform (all branded with school emblem so £££'s) just for him to outgrow it 🙄 Dense indeed...

Yep, unless each individual has wash that all goes in together or can wait a week then it just makes more sense to wash stuff together and yes to the timing as well. I don't like to use the tumble drier, we have an indoor ceiling airer thing or outside. the airer will hold more or less one full load and it mostly will dry completely overnight. If someone else the puts a load on and it's raining and the airer is full then where does it go?

Various loads get done during the week, but I know as a minimum at the weekend we need to have school trousers (teenagers) and work trousers (me) done with whatever else dark there is and a white wash with school shirts and whatever else, plus one of uniforms for DH which gets washed on it's own. That way all essential school/work stuff is available on a Monday for the week with the minimum available drying space of one wash a day if the outside weather is poor. Things such as towels and bedding and other laundry of which we have a bigger supply (casual wear, jeans, work tops etc) gets done during the week.

Yes, just do it all yourselves and don't ask your dc if you or your dc haven't got the nous to work out a sensible, cost efficient, practical and efficient method of doing the family laundry!

I need never worry about how much uniform/pe kit my dc uses as from age 11 they are perfectly capable of planning ahead to make sure they have enough for the week ahead.

Rules we have are underwear and shirts : change daily, school trousers: 3 changes a week. Towels twice a week, bedding every 10 days or changed each time we have guests (which is every weekend).

Plenty of clothes, towels, bedding and they just get on with it so when we have their friends staying my dc know where the spare bedding is so that they just sort out all that side of things too.

I used to watch my own mother run ragged with the laundry and other domestic expectations, like many of her generation she was on Valium.

I vowed never to be like her and luckily, as many of the slightly more intelligent people on here who can think beyond the box, there are other solutions that don't automatically tie women to domestic drudgery.

Slutty No one said you were dense. The thread properly.

Don’t understand this at all. Dh or I just pop whatever washing needs washed into the machine (as long as the colours are vaguely similar)

'read the thread' infact.

Mama what is it after 15 pages that you don't understand?

Our 2 year old does join in the fun by loading the washing machine with us and helping me empty it (closely supervised of course). He also puts his own clothes in the washing basket (he gets a bit over enthusiastic and any item of clothing not in a wardrobe or drawer will be put into the washing basket!)

Winners. Chill the beans hen

“Yep, unless each individual has wash that all goes in together or can wait a week then it just makes more sense to wash stuff together”

But you can do that and also be responsible for your own washing...

So if someone needs to wash work clothes and it’s only half a wash they can tell whoever is in that they’re doing that wash and see what they have needing washed that will fill it up, or if they want one t shirt washed they can ask if anyone is putting a wash on they can put it in.

It’s hardly a big hardship to spend 30 seconds talking to other family members...

When I say we all do our own washing, I mean we’re responsible for making sure our own clothes are washed, not that they must never be washed together.

If DD has certain things she wants/needs to be washed, she sorts it out and doesn’t just give them to me to sort out for her.

Winners. Chill the beans hen

Says the exasperated poster of "Don't understand this at all"

Thanks Winners for that helpful piece of advice 🤔 I have been reading the thread because I commented near the beginning (or at least I think it was somewhere near the beginning)

But I'm still convinced that for my family at least, without buying a gazillion extra items of clothing that dd18 will get fed up with after 4weeks I'm better off doing a mixed wash of everyoneswashing due to having a 9kg machine 😉

Slutty - The thread is questioning why people do their own washing? What you are doing is fine (everyone's washing), you are doing what works for your family and no one is questioning that. So what is the issue? can you not understand that other people have a different set up in their homes?

Says the exasperated poster of "Don't understand this at all"

You read that as exasperated? I took it as more mildly bemused.

It seems odd to me to have everyone do their own laundry but I suppose if your DH or DCs can't be trusted to do their part then it's a simple way to force them in to it.