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Original poster

To wonder why people only do their own washing?

563 replies

sweeneytoddsrazor · 14/05/2018 01:03

Just that really.

I see so many posts where people say DP's or any child over the age of about 12 do their own washing. Surely it's easier to just empty the laundry basket and do one wash of everyones washing rather than have 4 people do 4 washes with not much in it.

OP posts:
WaxOnFeckOff · 15/05/2018 14:51

Jeez, there is a halfway house between being a martyr to the washing and everyone doing their own randomly. In fact there are many half-way houses depending on lots of factors. Whether you both work, how old DC are, where you live in terms of weather, how many clothes people have, what size your machine is, what types of jobs/sports people do, how other chores are shared out etc etc etc.

It never fails that some people don't seem to get that other people do things differently because it suits them and their household to do so.

PuppetOnAString · 15/05/2018 14:57

We do ours together, why would I do washing separately? We have one wash basket and DH or I will put on a load when we need to. We do our own work uniforms though.

speakout · 15/05/2018 14:59

WaxOnFeckOff exactly.

A snapshot of laundry procedures tells you very little of family dynamics.

WinnersClub · 15/05/2018 15:09

WaxOn - Great post! Its very odd isn't it? its either you do things my way, OR if not, there must be something wrong with your family, never mind perhaps there's more than one way to reach the same goal?

Keiki · 15/05/2018 15:11

I do all the washing, however DPs likes his done entirely differently to how I like mine done, so I wouldn't mind if he preferred to do his own!
So:
his (bio, softener, mostly not tumbled)
mine (non-bio, no softener, tumbled unless I can hang out)
Everything else is done how I like, seeing as I'm the one doing the washing. If it's not in the basket, it's not getting washed. He's getting better at this.

mirime · 15/05/2018 15:38

@tabulahrasa

So if someone needs to wash work clothes and it’s only half a wash they can tell whoever is in that they’re doing that wash and see what they have needing washed that will fill it up, or if they want one t shirt washed they can ask if anyone is putting a wash on they can put it in.

And if DH comes to me and asks and I say you can't push a wash on today because there's nowhere to dry it?

Everyone has to do what works for them, we had a system that worked for us based on the difficulties we had getting things dry in a reasonable time while also avoiding unnecessarily high levels of condensation and the problems that causes.

Then we got a dehumidifier and that made it all a lot easier, but I still stuck to the routine because it worked for us.

Dieu · 15/05/2018 15:42

Really bizarre for co-habiting adults (or ones in relationship anyway) to do their own separate washing. It just seems such a misery guts thing to do.

HushabyeMountainGoat · 15/05/2018 15:51

One wash most days for us. Everything goes in. We all just muck in with whatever needs doing really.

tabulahrasa · 15/05/2018 15:54

“And if DH comes to me and asks and I say you can't push a wash on today because there's nowhere to dry it?“

It’s just a case of different things working for different households though, it’s not that how we do it is better for everyone, just explaining how it works fine for us without having to do loads of half empty washes or buying extra clothes.

We do mostly tumble dry, so drying space isn’t a huge issue.

BestZebbie · 15/05/2018 15:58

When my DH and I moved in together we each owned a laundry basket and had been doing our own washing. We just carried on.
There was never a point where there was a conversation saying "now I live with you, and seeing as you are a woman, you'll do my laundry too, right?" and if there had been it would have been an extremely short one!

AtLeastThreeDrinks · 15/05/2018 16:21

Me and DP each have our own laundry baskets, because he owns ALL THE CLOTHES and that means he only does a load of washing once every few weeks.

I run out of pants more frequently, but my clothes still constitute a full load. His giant man clothes fill the machine so there's no room to do it together anyway. Plus, owning fewer clothes mean I'd be putting the washing on way more than him, and that's not fair is it Grin

speakout · 15/05/2018 16:28

There was never a point where there was a conversation saying "now I live with you, and seeing as you are a woman, you'll do my laundry too, right?" and if there had been it would have been an extremely short one!

Has anyone had that conversation though?

jellyshoeswithdiamonds · 15/05/2018 16:29

Four of us here, I do all loads separately for each of us.

We all have our own laundry bins in our rooms, plus a whites in the bathroom.

When one bin is full I do that persons wash.

Doing it this way saves me masses of time sorting, other than whites. It all gets pegged out then when dry put back in a basket for ironing. Smalls are tumbled, they sort out their own socks etc.

As they have their own named ironing baskets in the utility room, once off the line I plonk them in there until I iron them or if they want something they can easily find it themselves to iron it.

WrenDouglas · 15/05/2018 16:34

Most things get put in the laundry basket and done together by either me or DH, I'd say we have a pretty even split on who does the laundry.

Exceptions for things with special washing instructions or that need a special load. DH does his own shirts for work at the end of the week and whatever other whites are knocking around; I'll do a load of my work dresses and a load of delicates. We'll ask if the other has anything to go in one of these 'special' washes, but we each take responsibility for getting our own work stuff ready for the following week.
If we go to the gym on different days then we'll do our own gym stuff rather than wait to make up a load (small flat, I don't want sweaty gym stuff hanging around stinking the place up Envy

speakout · 15/05/2018 16:35

As a PP said it is often to do with logistics.

I don't have a tumble drier.
As a family we have the need for 12 loads a week between us.
Although I have 2 large drying racks drying space can be limited .
Drying outdoors - which I do all year round, even when there is frost on the ground- keeps humidity levels down and gets clothes drier more quickly.
OH is out of the house every day from 7.30 am until 7.30 pm.
I am at home all day, so can take advantage of good sunny or windy days and take clothes in if there is a shower of rain.

Plus I am not afraid to admit that laundry is one of the few household tasks I enjoy.

WaxOnFeckOff · 15/05/2018 17:20

Sorry I know my post was a wee bit of a rant but I think it's true that people have different dynamics and as long as one person isn't feeling (or being) put upon then it's fine.

My DH could legitimately come on here and state that I never did any ironing and it was all left to him and teenagers and I would be decreed a lazy fecker (only if I was a man right enough..).

Yes, he does all the ironing but it's his chore of choice. Teen DSs do their own stuff most of the time. However I do loads of other things that he'd prefer not to, just as I'd prefer not to do the ironing...

speakout · 15/05/2018 17:25

WaxOnFeckOff absolutely.

My OH could come on here and say he has to empty all the bins, that he comes home to a cluttered kitchen and has to clear up and wash up every night.
That his wife does zero cooking, shopping, clearing or dishes from Friday until Monday morning.

All that is true.

But I do all the laundry.

EllenMP · 15/05/2018 17:30

I do everyone's laundry except for one of my grown stepson's. He prefers to do it on his own schedule and he works politely around my laundry routine. Frankly I like things done a certain way, and don't want six other people using my laundry room and leaving their things everywhere. I am sure that everyone would wait until all their clothes were dirty and then all want to wash everything at once. It's much easier to put on one or two loads a day for six of us combined. Plus, folding it is my excuse to watch bad television.

MrBennOfFestiveRoad · 15/05/2018 17:31

DH does his own as he works from home more than me, so is around to run the machine in the daytime, but he likes to mix all the colours together and wash everything at 40 degrees Hmm so I prefer to do mine and the DC’s. He does sometimes hang what I do on the washing line though.

Victoriaspongecake1 · 15/05/2018 17:32

When I lived at home with my mum and brother I used to do my own washing. I liked a different smell of fabric conditioner and I always knew what I washed so never had to ask ‘has anyone seen my jeans’ when I know I had washed, ironed and put them away.

Now I live with DP I do all the washing together

Icanttakemuchmore · 15/05/2018 17:32

I do my washing and Dh's and 24 Yr old Dd when she comes home at weekends from work and I also did my 19 yr old dds and her baby's washing.

Roversandrhodes · 15/05/2018 17:33

There’s just me and my toddler but when she’s older I’ll just bung it all in together .I wouldn’t expect family members to be separating their clothes and doing their own washing .It will all go In together .Id rather teach her how to operate the washing machine and separate colours so she can put a full load in herself .Surely that makes more sense ?

Athena18 · 15/05/2018 17:34

Completely agree with the discipline of laundry not being done if it’s not in the laundry basket. Apart from that I do all the family washing. Allows me to sort and use the machine efficiently. Good for home economy , better for the PLANET! I put away mine and his. Children have been convinced that it is better that they put away their own the way they like it.

wallowinwater · 15/05/2018 17:45

We’ve recently adopted this method due to having a large household- including 6 kids- avoids the need for endless washing sorting as the clean washing built up into an enormous washing mountain. It’s working really well- wish we’d done it years ago.

TellerTuesday4EVA · 15/05/2018 17:46

I think it's strange too. Whilst I understand the 'learning to do it yourself / life skills' thing I have to admit that DM did all my washing until I left home at 18 & I'm fully able to do my own now