To be fucked off at being so pale

[BrightonCalling]

Sick of it!

Going to a party with in laws tomorrow night and its either try and gradual tan my legs a bit or wear trousers. Its so fucking annoying.

And before anyone goes down the pale and elegant/pale and interesting route, we're talking a dead corpse blueish clammy shade of pale here, not a gorgeous opaque creamy pale.

Its so annoying. I dont even want to be a bronzed goddess just to have legs that look slightly coloured. You cant just slip on a dress you have to actually prep, do the exfoliating thing, then assess whether the rest of your body matches up, blah blah blah. Couldnt my mother have chosen someone swarthier to mate with?

Just needed to rant. If anyone would like to unleash their rage at their fish flesh coloured legs or another body part nemesis, feel free.

Off to gradual tan me legs now. Or ponder my collection of jeans.

/rant over

Neither of my parents are that pale - I don't know what happened with me! They've also both got brown hair - I'm now dark blonde, which makes me look even more washed out! I always get asked if I'm ill because I'm so pale. I quite like it sometimes, though - at least I can be camouflaged against the walls!

I'm thin and pale. I also stay out of the sun as it gives me migraines

I've been called Casper and vampire by my lovely dad

However tbh I don't care anymore. I just get on with it and ignore any comments now

Anyone considering the expensive brand st Tropez, st moritz is a dupe. Its just as good as but way cheaper. A mit is a must, one with a plastic liner stops your hands from staining.
I dont exfoliate, st moritz mousse is streak free and amazing.

You want to try having white legs with stunning vericose veins!
My legs haven't seen the sun for at least 15 years.

Yep! I also love Sally Hansen leg stuff. Unfortunately I got really bad eczema from a spray tan a few years ago and have to be really careful with it now. I think my legs are actually reflective. I was on holiday in Greece a few (20!) years ago and on the last day we went to this really lovely beach, my friend and I angled the parasols so our upper body was in shade and our legs in the sun all day with no cream on. Didn’t even burn! I must have no pigment in my legs at all. I used to use sun beds a lot but stopped as every time I went to go, I’d read horror stories. I know they’re dangerous but I hate being this colour.

Halloween soon anyway

Mwahhahhhhaaahahah

If your scared of a permanent fake tan, soap and glory do an amazing make up style fake tan, it will just rinse off.

Another Casper here, I just put a little Rimmel on my legs and arms, the exposed areas only a small amount.

No-one but no-one sees my upper arms, ever but my torso has not seen the sun since the last millennium.

We are never happy are we.....

I have just discovered palmers coco butter with gradual tanner in. I’m impressed. I look alright, now, for a fat lass 😂

I’m raw poultry white too. The look is further complimented by my chubby ankles and blue veins. Tan support tights are the way forward. You will feel better, look tanned, and even if anyone ever notices you are wearing them with sandals, they never have the nerve to comment. 🤣

Surprise surprise knees are now fucking orange! Skinny jeans it is tomorrow then

What a lovely thread of fellow English roses

Can I put forward a word for both the in shower tans from St T and Rimmel? Especially good for those who dislike the sweatiness and clamminess of moisturisers. The St Tropez is really straightforward and rinses off clean. Just work it in really well for three minutes with the shower off. The Rimmel one is a bit different- like a wax that leaves an oily residue on skin. I found the best way with that one was to apply an even layer, not try to rinse too much, pat dry and work over with a dry tanning mitt. Comes up a lovely colour and I'm sure they're less stinky. Bondi sands oil one in the dark brown bottle is also excellent and non sweaty!

I know exactly what you mean about the pale opaque skin OP - like Kate Winslet in Titanic. I’d be fine getting my legs out if they looked like that. Instead they are just... blueish.
Don’t bother with gradual tanner - use the wash off stuff. Seriously. Easy, quick and the colour look way better.

My mother is dark skinned and my father is very pale. My siblings are olive skinned, I'm like five day old skimmed milk. When I get a tan I do go dark but getting there takes ages and fake tan for some reason won't stick to my shins! Infuriating. I feel your pain.

@BrightonCalling
I use boots own NO7 range. The mousse and it works like a dream. I don't exfoliate either but then I use gradual inbetween to keep up and keep it hydrated.
When I can be arsed that is...

I've just had the pleasure of applying the ball ache tonight for a party tommorrow. I'll be damped if I'm the pale person LOL! Sad i know.

I wore the most amazing tights to a wedding last year- they were gorgeous.. I still have two pairs but have lost the packaging.
I am not big into tights but these gave a stunning effect. I can;t remember the name or brand, but a nude colour, slight tan, and they had the name lotion or silk in the name, they gave the impression of tanned legs with a glow of moisturiser, and hid any little imperfections.
Only £5 a pair or so- maybe someone has tried them.

Interesting to read all the different tips here. I am also a ghost face and always on the lookout for a non streaky non orange option to just take the edge off.

For those of you saying the lightest shade of foundation/powder is still too dark...i had this problem for ages until I realised it's because most makeup is orange based, so even the lightest shade is still orangey. I need a pink based foundation and powder. They're not the easiest to find but it's worth going to a department store and asking around on the makeup counters (it's been a long time since I last wore any so I can't remember exact brands now...). Made a huge difference!

Yes for foundation I've found the only one that really matches my skin is NARS sheer glow in the shade Siberia. It can be a bit heavy but I apply it with a beauty blender and that helps. It's a really nice neutral pale.

I am mostly shit with fake tan. No matter how much those on QVC whitter on about how the many self tan products do not leave tide marks and go on smoothly it is down to the expertise of the operator (klutzy me). The bits that tan on me best are the knuckles and palms. No matter how well I was it off.

Those tanning mits let the stuff through on to your palms. I tried a foundation brush to paint it on and got magnificently stripey legs. My arms looked good though apart from a bald patch where my watch strap would be but I hadn't worn it so it looked like I had patchy skin.

No matter what they say about self tan not smelling biscuity it all does on me once my skin warms up, even the tan luxe stuff that supposedly smells of raspberry. And of course an even better tan can be seen on my sheets! Ffs.

Revlon colorstay is actually amazing. The lightest tone has pink undertones I think. It has amazing coverage and has been hailed a dupe for estee lauded double wear !

I'm invisible without make up. My legs are always white and never take a tan. I also now have lovely red mottling on them due to standing at work all the time and nothing helps. I have nice legs and am quite happy to flash them and if anyone mentions how pale I am, I just agree. Gradual tanning stuff doesn't work on me at all. It simply does nothing.

@little I also embrace the pale far too lazy for tanning