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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think men put your nips away

148 replies

jnfrrss · 06/05/2018 18:53

I know from previous experience that many here live in a naice area. But I don't and I've seen several guys with their nips out around town and even one guy in asda.

Surely beach yes that's fine, but around town really? It's not even that hot.

OP posts:
OohMavis · 07/05/2018 07:50

I won’t let my DH wear shorts.

Goodness. Does he dictate to you what you may or may not wear, or is it just a one-way street?

Belindabauer · 07/05/2018 07:50

If it's hot for men then it's hot for women too.
Absolutely no need ever to be topless in the supermarket. It's air conditioned for Pete's sake.
If men do it then so too can women burden you imagine the outcry?

Kimlek · 07/05/2018 07:51

What’s your problem @RestEntries?
What annoys Dragon is the double standards. That’s fair enough.
You’ve also no idea how the ‘eeewww’ was said by @tailendcharlie and her DDs - it’s likely the tone was very lighthearted and jovial. Given that he mowed the lawn regardless suggests HE wasn’t upset. Chill!

Belindabauer · 07/05/2018 07:52

Totally agree about the can in hand, along with eirher:
A, a fat, hairy beer gut or
B, a skinny translucent chest.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 07/05/2018 07:53

So I cross the road in my t-shirt and pull a jumper on as I walk through the door of Sainsbury's? What a faff!

adaline · 07/05/2018 07:55

I don't get the posters dictating what their husbands can and can't wear!

Imagine if a man came on here and said "my wife went topless in the garden yesterday - I didn't approve so my sons and I both told her it was gross and went "eww". Then her favourite t-shirt got destroyed - I love karma!"

Or "I would never let DW wear shorts in the summer - it's either jeans or dresses. Shorts on women are awful".

They'd get called abusive within 0.3 seconds of posting, but it's okay (and even funny) for women to make the same comments about their husbands?

Belindabauer · 07/05/2018 08:11

Perfectly- no just keep your t-shirt on.
What's the problem with that?
Would you find it acceptable for your gp to be sat topless because it's hot?
Or child's teacher?

Ardant · 07/05/2018 08:13

I wonder if his OW treats him better than you do. Bet she does.

Well that escalated quickly.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 07/05/2018 08:21

I'm making a point. Men take their shirts off because it's baking hot outside, so they get hot walking to and from the supermarket. Are they expected to pull a t-shirt on at the threshold? As it's airconditioned? Outside isn't airconditioned.

Lethaldrizzle · 07/05/2018 08:26

Happy to see a nice fit torso - not so much the moob look - the 'double standards' do not piss me off in the least. Why would I want to walk around braless?

Sparklingbrook · 07/05/2018 08:29

It is grim. I don't really understand why they do it.
In your own garden fine.

user1471517900 · 07/05/2018 08:33

If a woman did go topless I actually think most judgement would come from other women. Men probably wouldn't care.... They might stare a bit but doubt they'd judge as much as other women would.

Sparklingbrook · 07/05/2018 08:34

I don't want to see anyone topless while out shopping.

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks · 07/05/2018 08:38

Belinda presumably GP's surgeries are airconditioned, and DD complains about her classroom being cold in summer. It's the only time she'll wear a jumper, except when she's made to for PE in winter.

As it is, I think it's slightly different, doing your job as opposed to going to the supermarket. I really wouldn't be horrified if my GP or my DC's teachers went topless in 25°. They're nipples, get over it.

I've just remembered, I've seen DD's teacher's legs. Last summer they went on a residential trip and he came back in shorts, because it was hot. Zero fucks given.

Katinkka · 07/05/2018 08:54

It’s very uncouth.

DragonMummy1418 · 07/05/2018 09:02

Reset - what are you talking about? ConfusedHmm

MaisyPops · 07/05/2018 09:07

Totally agree about the can in hand, along with eirher:
A, a fat, hairy beer gut or
B, a skinny translucent chest
I hadn't realised this til DH pointed it out last year. His theory is that the scrawny little late teens/20s lads who wander around half naked turn into the half naked beer gut men who stand outside the social club with a pint in their hand at 1130am.

I thinm he might be right.

60sname · 07/05/2018 09:12

I actually find the ripped ones worst, depending on how much of a swagger they have... Nope, that's not lust I'm looking at you with.

topcat2014 · 07/05/2018 09:14

As a teen, I was, for some reason, embarrassed about my body. Looking back now on photos it was no different to anyone else thin so I always wore long sleeves and jeans.

These days I re-dress the balance with shorts and short sleeved shirts, and enjoy having no top on on the beach or in my garden

Agree though that elsewhere is gross.

Will never fit into 32" jeans again though..

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 07/05/2018 09:15

Nips out means sweaty hairy armpits out too, for that reason I hate those gym style vests with overly large armholes as well

jaseyraex · 07/05/2018 09:20

My husband practically lives in shorts when he's not at work. He's that person who is always hot, whether it be sun or snow outside! He draws the line at taking his top off though unless we're in the garden.

I can't say it really bother me if people are topless out and about. In shops I find it a bit grim, only because I remember seeing one man holding loose apples between his arm and chest and then he went and put them back. I know most people would wash the apples first anyway but made me feel a bit ill thinking of someone's chest sweat all over them! I wouldn't want that from anyone, man or woman.

I do think woman should be able to be topless if they wish without it being indecent but I don't think that will ever happen. I don't wear a bra so that will have to do, I dare say some people probably find that a bit grim too Grin

DonutWorryBeHappy · 07/05/2018 09:29

I hate seeing hairy torsos around too. In many Spanish seaside towns they've banned all toplessness but for on the beach. We should have this here. Contain the nipple!!

IcedPurple · 07/05/2018 09:38

It's a very British thing that hot weather = stripping off.

Look at how people dress in really hot countries (India, Middle East, much of Africa) - we're talking long, loose garments for both men and women, often with some form of headdress. There really is never any need to remove a light shirt because it's 'too hot' - certainly not in even the 'hottest' British weather. It's not going to make you feel any cooler.

So yes, ladz. Put it away.

Northernparent68 · 07/05/2018 09:44

I see your point dragon, but you are adding to double standards by body shaming men.

MandalaYogaTapestry · 07/05/2018 09:52

I wouldn't necessarily like it if my husband took his shirt off in the garden. He is not the fittest and I think it is not nice to be naked around women if it doesn't look very good, even if the women are his own wife and daughter. If he were very fit then it's ok. Same applies to me.