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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

3 year old going to see the new avengers film.

404 replies

NotUmbongoUnchained · 25/04/2018 21:44

Would you judge?

OP posts:
Strugglingtodomybest · 26/04/2018 13:18

I admit, I would judge.

PasstheStarmix · 26/04/2018 13:20

OP dh is going to see it tomorrow, he’s a massive marvel fan. I’m annoyed I can’t go with him as i have to stay home and take care of our 1 year old and we don’t have luxury of capable baby sitters in the family!! Sad

toboldlygo · 26/04/2018 13:54

I've already responded once and it's hard to specific without spoilers but I think it bears repeating - this is NOT like the other Marvel films. It would be complete madness to take a small child to see it.

FisherQueen · 26/04/2018 14:07

I've already responded once and it's hard to specific without spoilers but I think it bears repeating - this is NOT like the other Marvel films. It would be complete madness to take a small child to see it.

I have to agree with this (saw it last night at a midnight showing). It's tone is much more in line with civil war and winter soldier then the previous avengers films. It's tense throughout and there are some specific scenes that I can think of that a young child would find upsetting that just aren't like anything that has been in a previous marvel film.

Adayindisney67 · 26/04/2018 14:12

Okay well I'm taking my 6,8 and 10 year old boys.. they've seen all of them, they've also seen all the Jurassic park franchise (which is alot more gory)
They are dead excited and have never been "terrified"
Each to there own I suppose.
A 12a means its the parents decision...
I wouldn't judge at all..

Quartz2208 · 26/04/2018 14:21

Yes but it should be an informed parental decision - I was thinking of it with my 9 year old and 6 year old (who can watch Jurassic Park/Harry Potter no issue) but having looked into it it is too much for them at this point - I will probably get the DVD at the time the second one comes out so they watch it as one complete film

Read reviews look into the content and decide from there

m0therofdragons · 26/04/2018 14:22

12a gives parents the right to make badly advised decisions 🙄

So many people on here who have seen the film saying it's not appropriate yet you want to take a 6yo? Why do people insist on their dc growing up so fast?

Faultymain5 · 26/04/2018 14:34

I wouldn't even look at you.
Do what you want to do. I'm taking my 16 and soon to be 10 year old to watch it. We're really excited.

Why judge unless you're perfect.

Adayindisney67 · 26/04/2018 14:38

Oh get lost M0therofdragons...
A lot of parents are precious and judgmental as well. If it was that bad they wouldn't make it a 12a, rather a 12..

Yes I'll take my 6 year old boy who sits through dinosaurs eating people because he knows real and fake. You have no idea what my child can and can't withstand. But here you are with the rest of the parents making massive judgements. Which btw if any parent tried judging in the cinema I would seriously laugh. How sad!X

I'm not taking him to see IT or some other film that would keep him up weeks. I'm taking him to see a superhero film that is a tad dark at times. Because you know that's life.

Now if I had said deadpool....

Get over yourself!

Skinnyboneylittlepony · 26/04/2018 14:40

As you get past your teens, mid twenties you get to see that every ‘good film’ turns up on TV sooner or later. Then you can pause, rewind, have subtitles, and not traumatise your children.

As pp said. The lack of distress in a preschooler at a violent scene is actually disturbing. Desensitised at best.

Quartz2208 · 26/04/2018 14:44

she is making the point that a lot of reviews and people who have seen it are saying it is too much (and adults have come out feeling that way).

Have you properly looked into it and are aware of what it is - its not Spiderman/Ironman and its more than a tad dark. Having done so I decided not to take my 6 year old who sounds a lot like yours (and he happily sits through Jurassic Park and Harry Potter as I said) because I think its best to see them both as one film and that will lessen the impact for him.

Willow2017 · 26/04/2018 14:47

There is a hell of a difference between a 10yr old and a 3yr old!
Why would anyone consider subjecting a 3yr old to a film with violent deaths and other violence, nightmareish creatures and adult content in it is ok?

EventNotInData · 26/04/2018 14:51

Dayindisney, the reason why they’ve made it a 12A rather than a 12 isn’t because it’s not that bad, it’s because a 12A certificate exists and a 12 doesn’t.

The OP at least is going to see it herself first, so will be able to judge whether she thinks it’s advisable for her DD to watch her all time favourite character get eaten to death by killer spiders (or whatever - I’m unspoiled but putting money on deaths - probably involving my personal fave).

pinkflamingo121318 · 26/04/2018 15:00

I would've taken mine at that age if they were interested.
DD watched Jurassic World around that age.

DS is 6, DD is nearly 5.
They both love Marvel films. DS especially. His favourite is Gotg2.. he rewinds the part where Rocket throws the men up and down repeatedly.

Although - we do watch them before they do. We wouldn't let them watch without having seen it first, just in case it is too much.

DannyConcannon · 26/04/2018 15:08

Ah, Mumsnet:

"If you don't think what I think and do what I do, you're doing it wrong"

Tringley · 26/04/2018 15:13

Tbh, I do think that this movie may be different from the preceding movies. This isn't a spoiler as I haven't seen it and have read very little on it, but a good few actors are nearing the end of their movie appearance contracts, so I'm that major characters may die in this movie. (And then come back to life in another movie because comic book characters don't stay dead.)

Summerisdone · 26/04/2018 15:21

Nope, I've actually just been to see it with my 3 1/2 year old. He loves all of the superhero movies and has been on countdown for this release... it was totally amazing by the way.

Summerisdone · 26/04/2018 15:26

She’s seen all the other films. I won’t take her then.

If your child has watched all of the other movies leading up to this then I don't think she will have a problem with this one. It was a little more full on in terms of violence, but only slightly.
I watched all of the other films with DS in run up to this one, and he was fine with all of them which is why I decided to take him to see this one, and not a problem, we've just finished watching it and he's currently gabbering down my ear about all of it.

It is all very dependent of the child, but as I say, if your child has already seen the other movies then this shouldn't be a problem for them.

stickerrocks · 26/04/2018 15:31

From the BBFC Insight: AVENGERS: INFINITY WAR is a US fantasy film in which an army of superheros must work together to stop an evil foe from destroying the universe.
Violence
There are frequent scenes of moderate fantasy violence in which various characters with special powers fight each other or battle an army of aliens. The violence includes use of shooting with futuristic weapons, punches, kicks and blows from other weaponry.
Threat
There is a scene in which a character is suspended by wires and pulled apart by a villain trying to extract information from her, but the torture is fantastical.
There is a middle finger gesture and incomplete uses of 'mother' and "chill the f out". There are also milder terms such as 'God', 'douche', 'shit', 'crap', 'butt', 'bastards', 'jerk', 'hell', 'ass', 'damn', 'piss' and 'screw'.

I wouldn't want a 3 year old listening to this kind of language, regardless of whether or not they have watched previous films. Your child is still at nursery, presumably with another year to go until they are old enough to go to school. You have obviously already made up your mind that your 3 year old is far older than their years, but I think it's actually really sad that you think it's remotely appropriate for them.

Onelastpage · 26/04/2018 15:36

I’d also warn that, as children’s understanding of violence, loss and conflict grows, they can find it more distressing. For example, DD loved the My Little Pony movie at first but is now really distressed about an argument where her favourite is in the wrong (she’s 3) and demands fast forwarding. She’s developing her own friendships so find that hard to watch.

A friend of mine has a really good reader who devoured Harry Potter at about 7 but got upset about some of the deaths in later books on rereading a few years later.

It isn’t necessarily a straight line of okay/ not okay.

Summerisdone · 26/04/2018 15:40

It saddens me how many judgey people are in these forums. I shouldn't be surprised tbh, I've found this to be the case since I first joined mumsnet, but it's still such a shame.

FWIW, I've didn't get any judgey comments or looks when I walked into the cinema with my 3 year old, and in fact had 2 separate people stop us on the way out to say how well behaved he was and then laughed at how animated he was in talking his face heroes

stickerrocks · 26/04/2018 15:45

It saddens me how many parents don't seem to be able to say "No" to their children. It's very simple, if a toddler says they want to run in front of a bus, you say no. If a toddler wants to see a 12A film, you say no. Film classifications are there for good reason.

DannyConcannon · 26/04/2018 15:48

I remember sitting down with my (then) 3 and 5 year old to watch Jurassic World at home:

3 year old was sound asleep after an hour;

5 year old was a bit scared by the genetically modified dinosaur, but loved the T-Rex, the mosasaur and Chris Pratt (not necessarily in that order);

I was utterly baffled at how such a flat, uninvolving trifle could make so much money, and why an otherwise relatively innocuous family film had such a nasty, jarring and out-of-place (and weirdly misogynistic? Discuss...) moment of violence right in the middle of it.

So, basically, the person who was most negatively affected by it was the 37-year-old...

DannyConcannon · 26/04/2018 15:49

It's very simple, if a toddler says they want to run in front of a bus, you say no. If a toddler wants to see a 12A film, you say no.

Yeah, those two scenarios are totally the same.

Original poster
NotUmbongoUnchained · 26/04/2018 16:25

It was amazing. I know I’ll be going to watch it again!

OP posts: