To ask for the benefits of living alone

[TheScandinavian]

This is me soon, after leaving a abusive relationship. I have a DD, never lived alone before. Went straight from my parents home to marriage.

Please tell me the perks of living alone

Not feeling like you HAVE to speak to the OH.

I remember that! 😂 when I've put DD to bed, I would just look forward to sit on the sofa and relax.

He would then come and sit next to me and show me YouTube videos, I would have to fake pretend I was interested and nod, when in reality I couldn't care less and just wanted to eat my bloody chocolate in peace.

It's fabulous, I'm so much happier now. I had a crisp sandwich for dinner 😁

All of the above. You will love it once you get used to it.

I was a lone parent for 8/9 years and while I love my now DP, reading all of the replies has made me reminisce about the lovely years on my own!

Someone mentioned Yellow Man Syndrome above. Why is it only men that turn the pillows this colour 😷

Go on holiday where you want, when you want, with your DC, with a friend or on your own. Cheaper and more fun without having to cater to a man's wants!

What is yellow man syndrome? 🙈

Am I the only one who reads threads such as these and think that none of those things were factors in my relationship / household with late-DH??
I really miss living with him, hell I missed him if he was away for a night.
Maybe it's a reaction to an abusive relationship?

Not having to share your bed
Watching what you want on TV
can do what you want when you want.
It's the best!

I miss living alone, I actually prefer it when my husband works nights so I have the bed to myself.

It is the sweat and the drool that makes the pillows that colour.
You won't miss the moaning , negativity, the manflu. the snout picking , teeth picking, not washing their hands after going to the toilet, leaving empty packets of everything in the cupboards, the bad breath, refusing to go to the Drs , acting like a dickhead behind the wheel, behaving like a spoil child .Wanting their own way all the time. Going on about elderly Parents , Family etc Sulking , showing off and generally being a CF . I may have missed a few .

I’m guessing a major perk is no one telling you what to do and not getting hit or abused would be a major perk! But living alone is great, you can have all the food you want whenever you want, you can see who you want when you want and you are free :) was there a lot of things you wanted to do or wear that he stopped you from doing/wearing well now is your chance!

You don't have to wear clothes.

So many of these I don't understand. Eat what you want and watch what you want on TV? Surely every adult can do that.

Lived on my own for 5 years after abusive ex left.
I cannot think of a single negative thing.
I loved it. I think the best thing for me was just the space to find out who I was again and doing everything that made me happy without anyone judging or sneering or questioning my motives.
Honestly living alone is the best.

It’s that you do not have to negotiate what to watch/eat with someone. Especially not someone who’ll just be an arse about it.

I’m really looking forward to doing things my way and not having ex complain about it being ‘wrong’.

Not every adult no gwen. Living with my ex I was treated like a child and everything I enjoyed watching on tv, everything I read, every hobby I showed an interest in, all the music i loved was ridiculed and sneered at. Some people just can't live their lives.

@Gwenhwyfar - you've never been in an abusive relationship I presume.

Farting in bed
The remote control
Never having to clean anyone else’s shit out of the toilet
Loud music
Walking around naked without breathing in
Not shaving
Cutting your toenails in bed
Long baths with no one wanting the toilet
Only ever having to pack for yourself
Quiet when you want it
Being able to invite friends round anytime
‘Self love’

Less mess , less laundry , and all the things the others have said.
Also my bond with my ds has intensified 100% we are so much closer not just because it's only the 2 of us but also because it's a calm happy atmosphere where I can give him all my attention and not be worrying/ arguing / being stressed and upset

I used to look at my bins and think "I can't divorce him - who would put the bins out?" OMG!!! Some weeks, I don't even need to put the bins out!

My cleaner comes once a week and she can't believe how little cleaning there is to do.

My food bill is minimal. Some days I just fancy noodles, and it is just that.

More child-free time. He has to pull his weight. I am more productive. Our children get twice as much attention. I actually look forward to being with them.

Having friends over. No worries that they are boring him, or him them.

Most nights are like a sleepover with myself! My house is beautifully tidy, and I love coming home

Oh yes - packing for oneself, baths as long as I like, only putting the dishwasher on every other day, laundry every few days, no-one cares. It is bliss!

But mostly - the sensory stuff. It is beauuuutiful quiet. No banging around! No TV buzzing. No horrible icky spatters on my bathroom mirrors... No stinky smells.

Um- I can pretty much do all of those liberated things in my own home, too. Despite sharing it with 2 DSs, 17/19, and a DH (58!).

However, I totally 'get' that I am in the fortunate position of being with a good bloke, not a tosser'.

My only fear for me, were I suddenly single, is that I might become a bit of a slob! Ideally I'd get up at 11am every day, having gone to bed at 2am, but that doesn't get you to work at 9! 😊

Tansie The OP is not asking about what you can do in your house, with your kids.

And believe me, the quiet of being by oneself when there has been a shit husband is amazing.

Happiness and company via others gives you a motivation to get up nice and early As do hunky lovers

I wonder if men have a list like this? About living alone, I mean? My DH misses me when I’m away, and would hate to live alone. I never miss him, and would love to live alone! If I had enough money I’d buy a house where we could live ‘together’ but with separate wings...

I've asked my exh, Nosquirrels and yes, for some things he quite likes being along (or rather, without me!) but I was more of an asset to me, than he is to me. We already lived separately in the big house and it was still crap. Maybe when your marriage is over, it's over...

Whoops - I meant ' I was more of an asset to HIM than he was to me'

I lived alone for a few years now... I'm nearly always naked or in my undies, never have to shut the bathroom door, can't eat what I want when I want and star fishing is great