Leaving London

[Sonotcivil]

Hi in a serious mess about this, I'm so confused on whether to leave London or not.
Background : grew up in small insular town in lincolnshire. Left at 18 and moved to London working with the civil service.
I'm now 24, in a relationship on about 35k a year in the civil service.

My issue is I want to start a family in a few years time and London is just so expensive. Me and my partner both earn ok money but renting in London is he'll, and would struggle to get a mortgage and the I don't want to be in my eyeballs in debt worth millions the.
However I love all London has to offer and think it could be an amazing place for a kid to grow up and live.
My job restricts me to some cities if I move, it can be Norwich, Leeds, Manchester, Sheffield, Cardiff or Edinburgh.

Any help appreciated

Dartford?

Essex, thanks for your story. I do agree Manchester is a great city too.
I wouldn't struggle as such affording Milton Keynes prices egg, but you go get a lot more for the same price in the places I've listed. Also I would be an hour ish from London when nth I don't see the point in that.

Just to counter Lifeaback, DH and I moved (with our three DC's) from London to North Yorkshire four years ago - and we are having an absolute ball! We're in a 5-bed house with three reception rooms, masses of space in the garden - and the kids have just had the time of their lives in the Easter holidays, out with their friends on the village green, in the playpark, going exploring up the stream and through the fields. It's a right good "Swallows and Amazons" upbringing, and I honestly wish we'd made the move years ago. My London friends scoff at the thought of being Oop North, but they don't know what they're missing - they can keep their cramped little flats in zone 3, with their 'cultural capital'. And keep on believing that York and Leeds etc have nothing cultural on offer

Oh, and I can do York to London on the train in 1hour 50 minutes - if I ever felt the desire to visit again. Which I dont!

Thanks jock. Don't worry I do know there's a lot of culture oop north.
I also agree growing up like that but mere minutes from a city is amazing.

It's such a hard choice, live in London which I absolutely love but rent for life. Live in commutersville, add loads to my day, feel left out of London life. Or live in a northern city where I can buy a house and still be close to the city centre.

The way I solved the problem was buying shared ownership. 10 years on and we've got enough equity to move to a non shared ownership house (in a cheaper bit of London).

I want my kids to be city people too, but then I also want them to be able to do send and long walks in stunning countryside.

For that reason alone I’d take a lot NF weekend in Sheffield and see what you think.

Long^

Battleax. Yes I think I should go and do a big visit of these places to see. I'm leaning to Leeds but London is just pulling me back. London is such an amazing place and can't be compared to but then the cost is insane and the lack of countryside and the pollution would upset me as a parent.

Just to let everyone know partner is happy to be anywhere that has a bit of hustle and bustle and he has never really settled and I don't think ever will . He went London 18 to 19. Glasgow 19 to 20. Estonia 20 to 22. Thailand 22 to 23. And now London 😂😂

It’s only really amazing until the cost outweighs that. Then it’s a poisoned chalice. I didn’t leave until my 30s but wish id bitten the bullet much sooner.

In London and surrounds it is just so hard to get your children the kind of wrap around care required to work. Names for school have to be down before the kid is born and there are waiting lists for any activity unless you have the cash or elbows to push yourself forward in the queue ...

It also so depends on what you want - I would love a situation of having proximity/access to a big city without the stress of trying to live in one.

I grew up in Leeds ( village outskirts not city centre) and had an incredible childhood (I now live in London).

The air, the views, the people are wonderful .... but public transport, shop opening times, etc are much more rural. Even just not having to tube is a shock to me when I go back home now. The lack of transport can be isolating If you don’t drive so keep that in mind too.

I love Yorkshire, and being from Yorkshire, but I’m not sure I could leave London now.

Although ofc that is is you choose rural Leeds over city ( it’s a sprawling city) and I see you wouldn’t do that in your later posts.

Battleax. You're right. At the moment it is affordable. But then were flat sharing. If we want a family no way in he'll is it affordable.
Lemony, I'm also worried about that, I love I can get nearly anywhere I want easily with the 24hr tube and night buses etc. Do you mind me asking how you afford it?

Well off to sleep but keep the advice coming

Move to a cheaper commuter town outside London!

We all love London but few can afford to raise families theee. For the price of a two bed flat we have 3 bed detached house with garage and garden 8 min walk to station that is 30 mins to Euston. I miss London Lots but it is still available to me!

I’m a Londoner that rents and can emphasise with your post SO much. Unless I become CEO at my company, it seems impossible that I would ever buy a house here; I’ll probably be 30 before it’s even a possibility. But at the same time I love London so much and nowhere else feels the same! I’ll instantly miss it

Annoying that your job means that you’d need to consider areas so far outside of London / commuter belt. If you do stay near London, that would be such a blessing for your kids. They will have a wealth of experiences and opportunities. I’m jealous of my friends that still live with their parents as they have London living with virtually no rent.

If I had my time over I wouldn’t leave.

I LOVED living in London, but I moved out a bit to buy a house. I regret it.

I think it’s a fabulous place to bring up kids.

It’s seriously difficult to move back once you leave.

Think carefully.

What's your actual job? Can you do the same job for a private company as you'll be paid more ?

City wise - how about Nottingham or Bristol?

Hi all. Job wise I can stay in London at Whitehall or transfer to one of those cities.

Thanks for the suggestions so far, I find the commuter belt scary . I don't know why I just feel like it is just letting go of London, and if I'm letting go I Mays well go the whole way and move to another city.

Flumpybear. I'm a procurement officer for the home office.

If you have children in Edinburgh they will possibly still be able to go to university in Scotland for freenwhen they teach 18.

And with children, you are unlikely to be taking the Tube or buses all night.