Woman went into my cubicle and locked the door while I showered

[IrisAtwood]

I can’t decide who was BU in this case. I was changing in a cubicle and had all of my belingings in there - as most do at my gym. I went off to the shower (quick shower!) and when I went back I found the door locked! I knocked on the door and a quite stroppy woman opened it reluctantly and said ‘let me get my trousers on.’ All she said to me was ‘I have a baby here.’ When she eventually came out fully dressed she went over to a bench where she had all of her belongings spread out and gave me daggers looks when I went in to change.
Who was BU?

I notice that there's no response from OP because everyone has told her off for cubicle hogging 😂

You were. Frigging hate cubicle hogs

OP was being unreasonable! Unless she comes back to tell us there were in fact twenty spare cubicles and the woman had just decided to go into the one with her clothes in to make a point.

I took the kids to swimming lessons the other day; it is always hell in the changing rooms and this day it was even more so as the "dryside" changing room was closed for repairs so all the adults going to the gym were using the swimming pool changing rooms as well. There was a guy bellowing at a woman in a cubicle, banging on the door and calling her names because she had taken her children to get changed in there and he had left his kids clothes in there to save it. He was definitely being unreasonable and I told him so, although I now have to avoid him every Saturday.

YWBVVVVU

I disagree. I don't think people should go and use a cubicle with clothes already in there. It's like someone sitting on a chair you have already saved for someone. A few years ago, someone did this to me at my child's swimming lesson. I usually go down to the cubicles minutes before the end of the lesson and get a cubicle (as most parents do). This time I put our bags in the cubicle and literally walked two yards away from it to tell my child who was getting out of the pool where to come. When I turned round to go into the cubicle, someone had nipped in and locked the door in my face!. Talk about pinching cubicles!!. He must have literally just seen me come out and stand two yards away!!!

I’d have taken your clothes to reception if you left them in there.

If you don’t try and bag a cubicle in advance then no one will go in it when your stuff is there.

It’s rude to try to reserve cubicles so people will react by ignoring your attempts to queue jump your child.

Odd to say that you shouldn't leave your things in a cubicle when you shower. Most people who use a cubicle do so because they are not comfortable taking clothes on and off in public. I have had a mastectomy and though not self conscious I just don't want to handle other people's reactions (I've had some very odd ones - you wouldn't believe the looks of revulsion, and upset, I have had. I do hope amputees don't have to put up with that all the time). Are people suggesting I take my gym kit off in the cubicle then put it in my locker and then move my stuff into another cubicle, if one is free, after? There are only two cubicles in our gym but everybody leaves their stuff in them when they shower. It would be different if you were gone twenty minutes but I really don't think it is unreasonable for a five minute shower?

YABU. You can't fill a cubicle with your stuff and then walk off.

Depends on the number of cubicles, if there are a lot and there were at least 5 spare then you aren’t being unreasonable but if there was only a couple then I can see why she would go into change. Best thing to do is after you come out, have a shower and then go to a cubicle instead of vice versa. Either way I still find that a bit weird, I would check to make sure everything is still there and maybe double check with a member of staff to make sure what the etiquette is and if she was right to do that

Odd to say that you shouldn't leave your things in a cubicle when you shower. Most people who use a cubicle do so because they are not comfortable taking clothes on and off in public. I have had a mastectomy and though not self conscious I just don't want to handle other people's reactions (I've had some very odd ones - you wouldn't believe the looks of revulsion, and upset, I have had. I do hope amputees don't have to put up with that all the time). Are people suggesting I take my gym kit off in the cubicle then put it in my locker and then move my stuff into another cubicle, if one is free, after? There are only two cubicles in our gym but everybody leaves their stuff in them when they shower. It would be different if you were gone twenty minutes but I really don't think it is unreasonable for a five minute shower?

At every gym I’ve ever been to, there’s room in the shower to take your clothes off, and space to hang them while you shower.

After leaving the shower, I then find a cubicle.

You were. Shower first, grab your things and then find a cubicle.

In our works shower, if you leave your stuff, it gets taken away and stored in Facilities Management as they assume it's suspicious.

I have some really nasty scarring so I'm not going to be wandering about naked in front of anyone anytime soon. In my gym there are only two cubicles in a large open plan changing room.

You don't put your things in a cubicle then go and shower and expect no one to use that facility. I get that you couldn't get in to your things so you could change, but that was your fault as well.

Sorry OP YABU.

Is it a cubicle only changing room?

At my gym there are only 3 cubicles and the rest is open plan.

Though regardless of that, at any other changing room I've been in, it is the norm to grab your towel/shower stuff, shower, return to locker and get your stuff and then find a cubicle. I've never seen anyone leave their things in the cubicle whilst they shower, ever. Even if it is a cubicle only changing room - it wouldn't make sense, efficiency and space wise, to have unused cubicles with clothes sat in them, blocking their use for someone else.

I wouldn't personally use a cubicle where someone had left their stuff. However, I can understand why someone was fed up of waiting outside an unused cubicle when they could be in, out and change din that time.

Why was there a baby at the gym though?

Many gyms have baby friendly areas including the swimming pool and creche areas.

You get your shower stuff from your locker, have a shower then go and get rest of gear and find a cubicle.

This. If cubicles are in short supply or you were using the only one in the changing room with a changing table I don't think she was being unreasonable to use the one with your stuff in it because it shouldn't have been left there in the first place.

However if there were tons of free cubicles and she was just making a point then her unreasonable-ness pips yours

YABU

I hate cubicle huggers, at my local swimming pool there are dozens of lockers but people insist on leaving their things in the changing cubicles whilst they go off for a 40 minute swim. It is absolutely infuriating. Selfish doesn’t even begin to describe this behaviour.

Sorry op but I think yabu. Cubicle hogging s poor form, although I’d not be comfortable using a cubicle that had other people’s clothes in it .

Yabu. The only thing you are entitled to hog is something belonging to you. I don’t understand why you didn’t shower first.

YABU.

Just like the selfish fuckers people who 'reserve' tables in cafes/coffee shops so that people who got their food drinks before them can't sit down.

I agree with Atticusss - if there were other free cubicles and she was being unreasonable but if not you were.

Holding a table is fine.

Holding a cubicle is not.

Panicked That is just not what they do at my gym, there are only a couple of cubicles but hardly anyone uses them unless like me they have a particular reason. I have never known one not be free. The hook in the shower is for your towel, it would be cramped trying to get your gym kit off in there . Perhaps it is a local custom thing but it is just a bog standard Virgin gym, and none of the gyms I have been a member of since surgery were any different, and one of those wasn't even in this country. In fact I struggle to understand why people would want to use a cubicle if they did not have a specific reason like mine. It is claustrophobic anyway and I would much rather be able to relax without people inflicting their own issues on me and change in the main area.

At the public swimming pool it is different, especially if you have children. There are not enough family cubicles and if I left things in the cubicle they would be at risk of getting nicked.

YABU unless there were loads of other free cubicles and she decided to use yours.
How on earth is she supposed to know whether you are going to be in the shower for 5 minutes or 20 minutes or whether you were swimming?

It's completely unreasonable to hog a cubicle. You get your shower things from the locker, go for a shower, then come back and get the rest of your stuff and look for a cubicle.

I'd have moved your stuff out though to use the cubicle rather than locking it in so in that respect she was a bit unreasonable. OTOH maybe she is pig sick of not being able to find a cubicle to use due to cubicle hoggers.

As for the cubicle hoggers, aren't you worried about having your stuff nicked, leaving it lying around in the cubicle? Where are your valuables? In the locker?