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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Am I that dreaded noisy neighbour?

205 replies

Chuggachugga · 15/04/2018 14:50

I’ll admit that the answer was definitely “yes” 5 years ago as we did weekly karaoke nights at the top of our voices till 4am. But it didn’t matter then because

OP posts:
feathermucker · 15/04/2018 20:54

Pretty much unanimous that you're being VVVVU!!!!!

OP seems to have disappeared......

BitOutOfPractice · 15/04/2018 20:56

Yes. Yes you are

bella2bella · 15/04/2018 21:00

It's not that bad, certainly not ideal but if it were a one off I wouldn't fall out with you over it. I remember my neighbours doing something similar and (and 2am) I was really annoyed but we didn't fall out as it really want a regular occurrence (they were drunk and singing loudly at the top of their voices in the garden along to their phone). An apology and bottle of wine may help (and not doing it again!)

RachelTeeth · 15/04/2018 21:20

absolutely appalling behaviour OP, there’s no excuse for it.

Original poster
Chuggachugga · 15/04/2018 21:26

I’m back again... I finished my song now! Yes I think I have been well and truly flamed here today so yes- I am listening and I have discussed it with hubby and we’ve decided that if the world thinks that you’re an arsehole then you probably are! So we will be keeping it down from now on.

However... (I am sooo getting flamed for this one as well) I’m still feeling a bit miffed about the whole thing. We’re friendly with them, we take in their parcels, I put the bins out for them whenever they’re away, I scoop the cat poop out of their side of the front lawn whenever I cut their side of the grass (neither of us have cats) and (believe it or not) I’m very approachable and friendly. I apologised afterwards and got a funny look but nothing more was said about it. They didn’t knock on our door on the night, they’ve had opportunities since to air their concerns, but they’re choosing the passive aggressive option of mowing up to the boundary line instead of talking to us. It seems a bit ott. Doesn’t it?? (Ducks for cover from ensuing onslaught!)

OP posts:
AtrociousCircumstance · 15/04/2018 21:35

No. You’re lucky they aren’t reacting in a far angrier way. You owe them a huge apology.

Taking in parcels - isn’t that just normal behaviour? You want a medal for that?

You’ve been horribly selfish and thoughtless and you’re pissed off with them for their reaction?

Like the kind of prick who says something insensitive and then, when pulled up o it, says “oooh I can’t aay anything can I!” And gets moody.

Grow the fuck up and apologise again, and assure them it won’t be repeated.

Ditzyitzy · 15/04/2018 21:36

My neighbours do this every few months and it doesn’t bother me at all.

paranoidpammywhammy2 · 15/04/2018 21:42

I imagine it's not just the 2 AM karaoke that's upset them. If you can't work out that it's not great behaviour - then I imagine you've pissed them off in other spontaneous ways.

AccidentallyRunToWindsor · 15/04/2018 21:45

Fair play on acknowledging you've been a bit of a dick OP

Who knows why they haven't come round to say anything? Maybe they are worried about confrontation, maybe they just CBA because they are worried about what reaction they will get. I think it would be the right thing to make the first move and offer an apology along with a caveat that if they feel you are bring noisy again they can knock/text/ poo a head over the fence to say and you will act on it

Original poster
Chuggachugga · 15/04/2018 21:45

“You’ve been horribly selfish and thoughtless and you’re pissed off with them for their reaction”

Very good point.

  1. if we hadn’t have kept them up then they wouldn’t need to react in the first place

  2. Not everyone reacts in the same as you... you can not fault them for not handling something your own way.

Ok. I am adequately shamed. Blush

OP posts:
FluffyWuffy100 · 15/04/2018 21:53

A noisy party twice a year does not make you neighbours from hell.

Slightly annoying, yes.

Lizzie48 · 15/04/2018 22:03

I'm very surprised you didn't anticipate the response you would get on this thread tbh. It is AIBU after all, and the answer is definitely yes you were U. If you'd given notice that you were going to do karaoke on such and such a date, that would have been different as your neighbours could have planned their lives accordingly, eg bought ear plugs, arranged to be away etc.

I do think, though, that 2am is too late for karaoke full stop in a residential setting. Midnight would be ok, but no later than that.

AtrociousCircumstance · 15/04/2018 22:11

Well done for taking this on board OP.

fluffywuffy the kind of person who can’t see a problem with keeping multiple people up past 2am may also be the kind of person who regularly has noisy dinner parties until midnight, and other thoughtless actions.

AnnaHindrer · 15/04/2018 22:13

We tend to be spontaneous...

Here’s a slap for that Hmm

CocoPuffsInGodMode · 15/04/2018 22:20

the kind of person who can’t see a problem with keeping multiple people up past 2am may also be the kind of person who regularly has noisy dinner parties until midnight, and other thoughtless actions

Yes, this! Honestly, if you needed a bunch of strangers on the internet to point out what a pain in the arse you are to do bloody karaoke until 2am then yeah, there is a very high probability that you're oblivious and inconsiderate in numerous other ways Hmm.

Dancingmonkey87 · 15/04/2018 22:23
Biscuit
Extravagant · 15/04/2018 22:25

I would be absolutely furious if you even did that once. Warning is not helpful (why should everyone in the area have a bad night because of you?) - just don't do it!

mogloveseggs · 15/04/2018 22:33

Next door was at it till 2am this morning. Dh has flu, the kids couldn’t sleep. Could hear it over the tv. He’s a twat, you’re being a twat too. Please don’t do it again. After 4 years my nerves are shot. If I could get past the panic attacks I’d have a serious go at him. It’s horrible to live next to no matter how many times it happens as you’re always waiting for the next time.

Inbedbyeight · 15/04/2018 23:24

You had a karaoke party until 4am the day they moved in? The poor people must have been besides themselves with worry on a day that is supposed to be a happy one!
Let’s face it, a karaoke party is a lot more offensive to the ears than a regular party with background music and chatting. It just is. I’ve had previous neighbors do both and the karaoke is a million times worse! I think you are being shockingly self centred and by the sounds of it you’re neighbours are quite rightfully not happy about it, I really hope they call the police next time you decide to ‘spontaneously’ ruin their weekend!

abiveve · 16/04/2018 00:41

You sound like a fucking nightmare.

I'm so glad all my neighbours are elderly people who go to bed at 9.

ChasedByBees · 16/04/2018 01:02

Another YABU. You could have easily finished at an acceptable time (say, 11pm at a push even though that would still be dire). There’s absolutely no need to make so much noise till 2am. Karaoke would be completely horrific to have to listen to. No wonder your neighbours are giving you funny looks. You’re probably ruining their peace and sense of home for them.

tinkerbellax · 16/04/2018 01:07

Sorry OP but I would definitely cut your electric cable. Do you sound like a strangled cat?

desertmum · 16/04/2018 07:13

This thread has made me laugh. All the outrageous indignation that someone made some noise one night. It happens. OP go round with wine, chocolates and flowers. Say sorry. Won't do it again and if we do we'll give you some warning and an invitation Grin

sarcasmisnotthelowestformofwit · 16/04/2018 08:15

God the hysteria!!!

Mulberry72 · 16/04/2018 08:17

@abiveve

I used to think I was lucky to live next door to quiet, peaceful, lovely, elderly people.

Except elderly people have a selfish habit of passing away and that’s when selfish, karaoke “singing” twats move in!