WTF is wrong with people?!

[itsallgravybaby]

Been out tonight for the first time in ages.
It was a friends birthday and we did a fancy dress pub crawl it was fun even though I'm nearly 30!

In between two pubs someone shouts "oh look it's X!" To the person walking next to me and praises him on his costume, then goes "oh look it's a fat cunt" about me.

I just don't get how people can be so cruel. I'm a size 18, and wasn't trying to be sexy or attract attention. Was literally walking down the fucking street. Totally ruined my night and I spent the next 15 mins crying in the pub toilets :(

Back home now feeling shite and so so upset, wtf is wrong with people, I didn't do anything :(

I have been called ‘pizza face’ (by teen boys on the bus on the way home from school for years, sounds so stupid but I had awful skin and used to go home and cry about it), fat bitch (I’m a size 10), ginger minger (am not even ginger) a posh cow (When in a city a long way from home so my accent was more noticeable), and once when I’d gone for a drink after work in my work clothes ‘look at that slut. It just hit me that day, those ‘boys at the back of the bus’- they do it to EVERYONE, and it just isn’t about me or you or any other woman it’s some weird fucked up issue they have, and I just honestly stopped caring. I know it’s easy to say and so shit when it’s something you’re insecure about anyway, but they are just not worth a single second of your time, that guy won’t be thinking about you now, he’ll have just moved on to insult the next person. It’s HIS issue, it’s shit you had to listen to that crap, but he’s the one who’s got to be with himself forever- you can move on and never think of him again.

I’m seriously losing faith in all men. Op I’m sorry your night was ruined. I don’t know what to say except all women get judged by a certain sort of sleazebag man when on a night out, you can be too big, too thin, too tall, too short, too old, ugly, fat arsed, no tits, tits too big, if your attractive then your ‘up yourself’ ditto if you ignore them instead of smiling at them like a good girl should. Fuck that.

I’ve had my first experience of negging I think. Got talking to a guy last week, he asked me out for dinner, I said I would think about it as I have a lot on at the moment, he sent me flowers and was texting me constantly to the point of me turning my phone off Friday evening, he asked me out for coffee yesterday, I had already decided that I didn’t want to date him as he was too full on so I worded a nice text saying that I thought he was a lovely guy but I’m not up for dating at the moment as I’m really busy but I’d like to stay in touch. He text back that I must have misunderstood him, he was just being friendly and as well as being too old for him I wasn’t his type

It’s like being back at school.

I can’t believe some of these stories, they are truly awful.

" I can lose the weight mate!, you'll always be a cunt! " Usually shuts the fuckers up.
Don't give the dick anymore head space. He don't deserve it.

Urgh. Horrible behaviour on this thread. I can still remember walking along without a care in the world at 19 when a man crossed the road to tell me I was the ugliest girl he'd ever seen. It is so hard NOT to be upset by such uncalledfor nastiness but it really isn't about you but them.

@Drainedandconfused
Lucky escape!

I’m sorry - people are just awful. His the one with the problem though. I was called thick once and that hurt so I know how you feel. Don’t dwell on it too much - take care x

Shut your mouth, you ignorant fuck, nobody likes you except your mum. Which is undoubtedly true.

OP don't let a cockwomble put you off enjoying yourself. I've had things said me and it stings doesn't it?
I'm broad shouldered, 5ft 8 and a size 16 (mostly on my tummy due to PCOS) so have been called "tranny" "fat" "ugly" amongst other things. I've even had a guy shout "ugly c**t" at me whilst walking with my DD who was about 6 at the time (luckily she didn't hear as she was in a world of her own with an ice cream).
When I was around 15, I was a size 8 but even then, broad daylight in my local high street and some nasty little sod shouted "move you fat slag" at me on his bike. It was entirely unnecessary as there was plenty of space. It was peacocking in front of his equally stupid mates.
Out of nowhere, an older guy, probably old enough to be my granddad, was sitting on a bench behind me. As the guy on his bike went past him, looking behind him to laugh at my upset, the old guy stuck his walking stick out!!!!! Nasty one goes straight over the bike head first, everyone laughing at him.
I hugged that old fella. He was my hero! He said he had a granddaughter and would hate someone doing it to her.

@sameoldsame yeah I think so too, I was starting to feel uncomfortable, he knows where I live and I live remote so I’m keeping my wits about me for a couple of days.

Some men are just cunts, it's as simple as that.
My dd2, 15, was crossing the road to go to her dance class. She was wearing trackie bottoms, trainers, a hoody with the hood up so none of her face of hair was visible and her dance bag slung over her shoulders. As she was crossing some twat leaned out of his car window and shouted at her " are you looking for sex, dressed like that! "
Honestly if I'd have been there I would taken a picture of his reg and face on my phone and plastered it all over face book what a total twat accepting child he was.
My dd2 was gobsmacked. She said he couldn't even see her face!

Years ago I was with a friend in a city centre. Sat minding our own business on a bench. I was wearing loose fitting jeans and a top with flat shoes and no make up.
A group of young men around d the same age approached us and a t first they were friendly. One of them then asked me out. I politely said no. He then turned into a raging animal, called me a fucking whore and a stuck up slag.
He then proceeded to spit at me. I stood up and told him he was a disgusting pig. My friend told me to leave it. He then raised his fist as if to punch me. His friends grabbed him and pulled him away, telling him he had gone too far.I

They dragged him away still frothing at the mouth. I've never forgotten it.
Absolute filth.
No wonder women are choosing to stay single if that's what's on offer.

I can loose weight but you’ll always have a tiny willy

Or I can lose weight but you’ll always be ugly or just a disdainful look, say ‘twat’ and walk away.

It’s unbelievable how men can just come out with this shit to show off or just because they’re nasty wankers. :(

Sorry to hear so many of us have been subjected to this misogyny. Isn’t it sad that we all seem to have the same experiences - where on earth do these ignorant, disgusting pigs come from? And it’s sad that we can all remember these insults years later

When I was about 17 or 18 (and weighing about 8 and a half stone) I remember walking through town on a summer’s day, wearing a loose top, sandals and a pair of shorts. I’m pretty sure I looked nice and I certainly felt happy. An older man stopped me and asked if I could give him directions - did I know the way to Weightwatchers? I said “no, sorry”, and he grinned and said “thought not”. Now, what absolute twat of a man says that to a young girl? All these years later, and I remember how all the pleasure in the day drained away from me. There really are some spiteful, nasty men who go out of their way to make girls and women feel shit. I worry about my daughter and what she will encounter as she goes through life. I think every female I know has been verbally abused by men/boys and sadly most of them have at some point also been physically assaulted.

I've had this in the past, it's an unfortunate part of the kind of job I do, I get abused too often.
It took me a few years and plenty of crying to grow a thick skin but finally now I know that these people are nasty individuals who won't get far in life with an attitude like that and not to waste my own life on a piece of scum like that. Their opinions are literally worthless, they are worthless and I am not going to waste even one tear on something entirely worthless to me.
You will get there with the brush it off attitude eventually but you really have to repeat it to yourself over and over often even when you don't believe it, you eventually will.

Try practicing a factual retort - fat isn't an insult, it's a state of being like being white or red haired or tall etc, just treat it like it is and then reply with...
"And your a brunette, what's your point?" That takes the nasty straight out of the 'insult' and they will look like the ignorant arseholes they are.

I am horrified by the sheer cruelty experienced by everyone on here. A few words are enough to hurt deeply and clearly many remember the hurt years down the line. Absolutely disgusting that men feel entitled to say such things. I just cannot imagine any man I know saying something like that. I think as others as have said, behaviour like this says a lot more about the aggressor than the target.

The poster who mentioned a lady being accused of looking like a man reminded me of that great quip in Aliens:

Man: hey Vasquez have you ever been mistaken for a man?
Woman: No. have you?

once i was wearing an above the knee skirt and bare legs with converse, if you can imagine the look? i was only in my early 20s. anyway i was walking along and this builder whistled at me, which i ignored and continued walking..
next thing he shouts 'farking sluuuttt ' at me!

I went home and told my mother and stepfather who said i shouldnt mind as he was 'just lashing out'...

My DD is 10 and (if her experiences are like mine) it won't be long before blokes are yelling at her in the street as she goes to school. I had countless men asking me what colour my pubes were at age 11.

How can we stop this?

great way of looking at it dragonmummy

When I was young (and slim and attractive) I found comments from male strangers devastating and it worsened my eating disorder. I remember jogging past two boys and one saying ‘big bum’ and the other saying ‘nice bum’. I remember being 16 and about 8 stone and a boy calling me fat. At such times I always just walked away in embarrassment. But now I’m more confident so when a few years ago a man muttered about ‘some fat bitch’ as I was passing, I drove after him in my car. I slowed down, opened the window and shouted ‘ugly loser’ at him, then sped away! Not especially proud of going down to his level but I wanted him to know how it feels.

Funny how popular myth has women down as "bitchy" ime men are a million, trillion times more cruel.

A Canadian friend dealt with this brilliantly, a random man said something vile and she did a sort of quizzical expression and asked really calmly in a friendly way "why did you say that? Thats really strange. Is everything ok?". He totally totally did not know what to do with that response. Took the heat out of it too.