WTF is wrong with people?!

[itsallgravybaby]

Been out tonight for the first time in ages.
It was a friends birthday and we did a fancy dress pub crawl it was fun even though I'm nearly 30!

In between two pubs someone shouts "oh look it's X!" To the person walking next to me and praises him on his costume, then goes "oh look it's a fat cunt" about me.

I just don't get how people can be so cruel. I'm a size 18, and wasn't trying to be sexy or attract attention. Was literally walking down the fucking street. Totally ruined my night and I spent the next 15 mins crying in the pub toilets :(

Back home now feeling shite and so so upset, wtf is wrong with people, I didn't do anything :(

I reckon that comment wasn't anything at all to do with you and everything to do with him. You could have been anybody.

What he wanted was to feel dominant and in control because he knows he is neither.

I've seen this kind of behaviour so many time and it's always the self-loathing types that do it.

Feel anger, it's justified but I feel pity. You cried for a moment but he hates himself forever. But also feel proud to know that one of the reasons this shocks you is because it's a million miles from who YOU are or what you do.

To me fat is not much off an insult when held against say selfish, vacuous, spiteful, cruel. Fat is hardly a character flaw and says nothing about your worth as a human being. But being someone who intends to degrade another person in such a flyby manner speaks volumes.

Only one cunt and that's him. I have copped a load of verbal abuse off men on nights out too. I am not overweight but still been called fat, ugly, a minger etc. I have no idea why, because, like you, I have done nothing to try to attract attention. Maybe that's the thing they don't like- that you're not pretending like they are God. I once bumped into a guy by accident and got a mouthful about how I was a fat bitch.

Tell X their mate is a cunt and they should have fucking stuck up for you.

I think OP's friend was dressed up in costume, for example as Little Red Riding Hood, and the guy was a stranger who yelled 'oh look, it's Little Red Riding Hood' and then went on to insult the OP. Don't think her friend knew him at all so can't see why blame should fall on her/him.

Also, the best thing is not to engage in a slanging match but to simply ignore the guy. I wouldn't want my friends to start yelling insults back at some bloke who might then escalate it and get even nastier. I would just want to get the fuck out of there.

Believe me, what he said had nothing to do with your size! I'm a size 10 and men have called me fat! Unfortunately we live in a day and age where some men expect nothing but what they believe is perfection

I bet you looked great :)

Op it's pure misogyny not even connected to you or your size. I actually got worse abuse when I was attractive (size 8 twenties regular featured). Was on my bike and a man in an open top car pulled up, face twisted with hate to call me "a fucking cunt". My sister and I were sitting on a tube platform dressed to go out (jeans and nice tops) and aman started ranting that we were whores etc. I can think of more.

Great being 40 plus it pretty much stops x

I had this on a night out too, my friend was seeing me out of the pub we were in as I was going home, we were holding hands, as you do in a busy pub while trying to squish passed groups of people. Friend was leading the way and a group of guys made space for us to go by, she is tall and stunning so got comments like "I'll take you up the road, gorgeous" etc, and then i got but you can stay here love, wouldn't want to wake up next to that in the morning.

It was my first night out in ages, and I thought I looked presentable, hadn't been drinking as I was on medication for anxiety, so got into my car and sobbed. Really knocked my confidence.

Those guys didn't mean anything to me in the end, just grateful I'm not with a guy like that.

for you OP

Yet another example of how some men think it's acceptable to verbally abuse a woman based on how she looks and then no doubt expects to be patted on the back by his mates for his witty "repartee.

On that note, I'm willing to bet the idiot was no oil painting.

Ignorant scum. Chin up Lovely 💐💝

I came here to say the same thing as catfromjapan. It’s ‘negging’, done intentionally or not, remains to be seen and don’t give it the headspace.
I’ve been size 8 and was still called fat. My usual reply was insulting them back, if I was in the mood. But mostly I used to say “I won’t fuck you mate, in a million years. You’re wasting your compliments! Leave” not once anyone said a word more and most zipped it and fucked off my view.

You could have been anyone. That comment wasn’t really about you. It was about his own low ego.

I've also been called "fat" by strange men. I've always been confident, not sensitive about my weight or anything else but even so, each time I've been hurt and questioned my weight before giving myself a mental kick. Im a size 8. It's utterly disgraceful and nothing to do with you personally even tho it obviously feels like it. Not surprised it ruined your night - er, of course it did!! - but please try not to let that gobshite dickweed ruin another minute of your day. Hopefully he's suffering the hangover from hell after being rejected by every poor woman he tried it on with last night . Nobhead.

@thecatfromjapan brilliant

Hope you're okay this morning OP. I agree you'd have been insulted no matter what you looked like, and it wasn't at all about you.

If you'd been super-skinny the mate would have yelled something about sluts, whores or bitches instead. It's pretty easy for them to guess women's insecurities.

But on the plus side, you sound really nice. You went out and about and had a fun party with lots of friends and that's more than I could do. I really hope you're not valuing your worth on some shithead's throwaway insult too much today.

This has happened to me and more than once. I remember standing at the bar in a pub waiting to get served and this bloke next to me, sitting on a bar stool, just looked at me and said loudly, “Eugh you fat cunt!”.

To the previous poster who suggested this was ‘negging’ - I can see where you’re coming from, but it’s not. These men have absolutely no interest in establishing a relationship with the person they are abusing, they are being nasty because they think the woman who dares to be unattractive to them, is worthless.

I’m both ashamed and proud to tell you that the exchange above terminated with me giving the barstool bloke a smack in the face, knocking him off his perch. I was furious that he would be so utterly dismissive of me and I wanted to put him off doing it to anyone else. He certainly didn’t expect it and I hope he thought twice before opening his filthy mouth to any woman like that again.

Ah, you cried for 10 minutes, but he is sad wanker for life

Did your friends stand up for you? How did they handle it? I'd hope if someone singled out a friend of mine for no reason, I'd say something (even if just a "well you're no Romeo" or "why don't you shut up?!")

fireballl I've been called the same as OP too and I'm a size 10. Its just an utter dickwad default phrase designed to try and hurt/dominate and 'impress' their equally dickish mates.

What a horrid man!
Sorry that happened to you op

you should have slapped him girl.

once i had just dropped my small children off to meet their dad, was really hungry and got a kebab on the way back down the road to the bus stops..
'do you want chilli sauce?' said the kebab man, holding a ladle of it over my kebab...
i thought about it for a minute and said no.
Then i was walking down the road eating my kebab..
Guy walks past me, young guy with two older people, says to me 'youre ugly' in a really horrible voice.
He walks on, i follow him, grab his jumper, and as he turns round, i push the whole kebab directly into his face....
'be grateful tankgirl doesnt like chilli sauce' I said..(OK i didnt, not really)

I’d have looked him in the face raised my eyebrows head tilted and said loudly ( so everyone can hear)
‘I can loose weight but you’ll always have a tiny willy’

I’ve had this, size 12 & more importantly I walk with a stick as I’m limited mobility. I get a lot of comments. I always use the MN “did you mean to be so rude?”. It’s them not you.

Fat is just the go-to insult for a woman, regardless of size.

@thecatfromjapan has it perfectly!

Mentioning his willy is just playing to him. He will take it as an invitation to show you how large it is

The middle finger is the only correct response in this situation.

There's one cunt involved in that interaction op, and it wasn't you!

Console yourself with the thought that if that's the level he has to stoop to to impress his mates, he must have massive issues himself.

There's one cunt involved in that interaction op, and it wasn't you!

Console yourself with the thought that if that's the level he has to stoop to to impress his mates, he must have massive issues himself.

Best put down I've heard was from my friends aunt. She was called a fucking man on a night out. Yes she said and my balls are bigger than yours and my strap on is bigger than your cock.
All his mates laughed at him and took this piss.
That guy who insulted you is just pathetic.