I totally get you, OP.
After 20 odd years of marriage, I let my husband have both barrels a couple of years ago. We have a great relationship but sometimes, my husband just doesn’t think.
I spend time working, keeping the home going and making sure that him and our two kids have what they need. I see to birthdays, Christmas, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, easter, I make sure the three of them have eggs and advent calendars which they are thankful for.
He works a long hours job and as I worked part time while the kids were younger, I thought I was taking some of the home stress away from him. But on my birthday, it would be a last minute thing, as was Christmas.
Valentines disappeared, mother’s day was forgotten when the kids stopped doing cards at school, (they did them at home) and I never ever got an Easter egg.
Then I blew my stack. I told him I spent 365 days a year running around after the three of them and all I was asking for was for him to think about me first for four days a year.
The next day he came home with a creme egg for me and I cried.
For the last two christmases, they’ve bought me advent calendars and for the past two years, he’s bought me flowers for valentines and Lindt eggs at easter.
If you don’t tell them, they don’t know!!