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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that no one is as dumb as me?

100 replies

Babababababybel14 · 22/03/2018 22:11

When I was about 11 I decided to bleach my hair. This was before the internet. So I thought bleaching your hair meant exactly that. As in the stuff you put down the loo. So I poured half a bottle of bleach on my head. Screamed the house down and had to be carted off to a and e. Very painful burns for weeks.
No one can beat that level of idiocy

OP posts:
MissionItsPossible · 22/03/2018 22:12

YANBU

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 22/03/2018 22:13

Not me but my sister as a kid thought she could get holes in her hair by hole punching it...::Hmm

UpstartCrow · 22/03/2018 22:13

You were 11 and didn't know any different. My brother made exactly the same mistake except he got it all over the new bathroom carpet. So YABU.

FissionChips · 22/03/2018 22:15

Well, my mother thinks “imbalance of the humors” is an actually thing Hmm.

Willthisdoo · 22/03/2018 22:15

Who puts carpet in a toilet though??? Shock

FissionChips · 22/03/2018 22:15

Actual*!

Juells · 22/03/2018 22:15

I don't think that's a particularly outlandish mistake for a child to make.

Spanneroo · 22/03/2018 22:17

My sister got something in her eye as a kid and squirted detol in it because she thought it would help to clean it. It did not. Thankfully, no lasting damage.

FlatKraken · 22/03/2018 22:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Aprilmightmemynewname · 22/03/2018 22:27

My adult dd warmed a Greggs chocolate muffin for 5 mins.
It was a glowing ember in the microwave!!

OwlinaTree · 22/03/2018 22:28

I thought sprouts grew in little rows like cabbages.

Spanneroo · 22/03/2018 22:29

Owl they would be so adorable!

Urubu · 22/03/2018 22:31

My sister and I tried to smoke grass, as in actual grass from the garden rolled in a piece of actual paper...

Aquamarine1029 · 22/03/2018 22:33

One time I went to microwave a bag of popcorn. The correct amount of time was 3:33. I accidentally punched in 33:33. By the time I realised what I had done, the bag was on fire and smoke was filling the house. It took days to get rid of the hideous smell, and I had to throw away the microwave because the stench permeated the whole damn thing.

kimanda · 22/03/2018 22:34

@FlatKraken

I love Orphan Black, but that storyline where Helena having her hair bleached, turned it yellow-blonde and frizzy for life was a bit silly. Grin

Unless it was meant to be the shock that did it!

CaffeineAndCrochet · 22/03/2018 22:36

As an adult, I decided to test the cigarette lighter in my car. With my thumb.

PavlovaPrincess · 22/03/2018 22:36

This was before the internet

Yeah, even in the age of internet, I'm sure you could find a website that suggests, nay, recommends that method.

See PP's Orphan Black comments for evidence.

kimanda · 22/03/2018 22:36

Did you not wonder why the microwave was carrying on past 3-4 minutes @aquamarine1029?

WhitePhantom · 22/03/2018 22:38

My mum's bottle of perfume looked empty, so I peeped into the tiny hole where the perfume sprays out, and pressed... It wasn't empty Confused Ouch!

I didn't want to go to the hairdressers because I wanted to grow my hair long, but was told that I had to get the ends cut so that it would grow longer - I also wanted to have long eyelashes, so guess what I did...? Grin

And I couldn't understand why if I stood on the scales with only one foot I still weighed the full amount - I thought I should only weigh half.

Also (when I was very young) I couldn't understand why if I wrapped my arms around myself I couldn't pick myself up Hmm Grin

Katedotness1963 · 22/03/2018 22:47

Tested the iron with my index finger, no fingerprint for a while...
Put foil covered cardboard into the electric fire to try and get a light for a cig, it was really bright...
Thought I was too short to worry about closing the upper kitchen cabinet, black eye...
My brother asked what "high tea" was. I said its when you pour it like this, held teapot at arms length, lid came of, got scalded...
Couldn't understand the fuss about the menopause as had it in my mind it lasted exactly 15 minutes...
Decided to repack my hospital bag while in labour and ready to go to hospital. Arrived in the hospital with no toothbrush, no hair brush, no birth plan...

I could go on, but you get the picture...

Sprogletsmuvva · 22/03/2018 22:48

When I was a student, there was a bit of ‘faux-poor’ stuff going on with my fellow students (who were generally better off than I was). Anyway, one claimed to have used household bleach on her hair as she “couldn’t afford hair bleach”. I tried the same and to my surprise found it made no difference to the colour (light brown). But it also did nothing to my skin...maybe 11yos are a bit more sensitive than 21yos.

MissClareRemembers · 22/03/2018 22:52

When I was about 11 I decided to check to see whether the electric ring on the cooker was heating up. By placing my entire hand flat on it. It was indeed heating up!

Ouch.

ShirleyPhallus · 22/03/2018 22:56

I turned the tap on and couldn’t tell if it was hot or cold (mixer tap). So instead of putting my finger under I put my tongue under. It was fucking hot. This was only the other week....

RosaRosaRose · 22/03/2018 22:56

I once changed the fuse on a plug and decided to test it before putting the back on. Pushed the open plug into the mains with my thumb. It hurt. Lots.

LyannaStarktheWolfMaid · 22/03/2018 22:56

I think that no adult human could be held to account for how dumb they were as a child, that’s the whole point of childhood, surely? I shaved my whole legs in secret in the bathroom with my mums razor, completely dry. Ouch. I also have two very questionable, fortunately invisible tattoos. And numerous laughable exes. We live and learn!